He was sleeping soundly naked, and I was eating leftover sushi. I couldn't help myself. I spread open his cheeks ever so softly, and tucked a slice of Philly roll right next to his puckered asshole. He did not wake up. When he awoke several hours later, he thought he had shit himself. I managed to video him discovering it was in his asshole, and I cannot stop watching him dig salmon, cream cheese, and rice out of his butthole. I also cannot stop laughing. I needed to tell someone.
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
its 3 am and i fucked up really bad
I was hungry so i decided to eat some bbq wings and watch some anime. there was about 6 of it and i ate 3 and a half. that was when i started to feel a bit funky on my hand and mouth, and i thought to myself "wow, these bacteria are extra rough today". i used the flashlight on my phone to see what was going on and there was an army of ants covering my hands and i shit you not, i cough once and my mouth is a shotgun that shoots ants as bullets. i was covered in fear and ants and the urge to scream, but the fear of asian parents is stronger. i can only cry silently in a dark and quiet room, all alone, while being violated by ants.
I'm gonna play this perfectly. Kripp misses lethal.
twitchquotes:
Kripparrian grabs Rania by the scruff of her delicate neck, thrusting her to the Hyper-X Ultra-White High-Def gaming chair. The Krippster's rightfully claimed woman presents her rose-hued folds to her master in submission. "Top deck me and #Shrek me, you Romanian stallion" Rania wails in passion. Kripparadino kicks Cattarrian aside, and towers over the chair, "I'm gonna play this perfectly." Kripp misses lethal.
twitch chat
Kripp
Hearthstone
A game? You think getting the juice is a game?
twitchquotes:
A game? You think getting the juice is a game? The juice is a lifestlye. A way of being. The juice encapsulates all you are and consumes. Taking one look at you I can tell you have never come near the juice. Maybe think about what you say before you try talking to me again, pussy. 
twitch chat
Lea pegging Reynad
twitchquotes:
ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ Google Pegging or RIOT ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ LEA PEGGING REYNAD OR RIOT ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ
twitch chat
Reynad
newbies in Summit's chat
twitchquotes:
wow, I can tell there are some newbies here in Summit's chat. listen, I've been watching him for almost 4 whole months now, and I know what he's about, so listen to me and I'll teach you. when SumSum (that's what vets call him here) plays SoT (that's Sea of Thieves) he plays sneaky and steals look. it's kind of his thing. haha
twitch chat
Summt1g