[Copypasta] I put sushi in my husband’s butthole while he was asleep

He was sleeping soundly naked, and I was eating leftover sushi. I couldn't help myself. I spread open his cheeks ever so softly, and tucked a slice of Philly roll right next to his puckered asshole. He did not wake up. When he awoke several hours later, he thought he had shit himself. I managed to video him discovering it was in his asshole, and I cannot stop watching him dig salmon, cream cheese, and rice out of his butthole. I also cannot stop laughing. I needed to tell someone.
May 2022
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Kripp after the power outage on December 21, 2013

twitch chat
May 2014
Kripp

MY GREETINGS ResidentSleeper

twitchquotes: MY GREETINGS ResidentSleeper SHAPESHIFT ResidentSleeper SHAPESHIFT ResidentSleeper THE CIRCLE OF LIFE IS OVER ResidentSleeper PLAGUE LORD ResidentSleeper MY WINGED CHILDREN FILL THE SKIES ResidentSleeper I AM THE ESSENCE OF MAGIC ResidentSleeper
twitch chat
March 2018
Kripp

Hearthstone

Dragon

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠤⣲⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡠⠖⠋⢀⠞⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠜⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡰⠊⠀⠀⡠⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⠊⡰⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡼⠁⠀⠀⡜⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠤⠚⠁⡜⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⠤⠖⠈⠀⠀⢀⡜⠀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠔⠓⠲⢤⣸⠒⣊⣭⠛⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⢿⡶⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⣹⠎⠀⠀⠑⡄⠀⢀⡠⠔⢊⡥⢺⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⠎⠀⠀⠀⣠⠞⠁⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⠋⠁⣠⠞⠁⠀⢸⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⠃⠀⡠⠊⡜⠁⠀⠀⠀⢀⡊⠁⠁⠀⢊⡀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣉⣓⣦⡤⠤⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⡤⠊⠁⠸⠀⠀⠀⡠⡖⡝⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢉⡩⠭⠒⢋⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡸⠁⠀⠀⠀⠑⠒⠛⠒⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠤⣀⡀⠈⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠜⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⠤⠄⠀⠀⠀⡰⠚⢧⠉⠒⠒⠮⠽⣾⣦⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠋⠁⡠⣖⠂⠀⠀⠀⡠⠋⠉⠀⡀⠀⠀⢀⡴⠁⠀⠸⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠙⢌⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠘⠐⠁⣀⡠⠔⠋⣀⣀⡴⠚⠓⡶⣞⣉⣀⣀⡠⢤⠇⠀⠀⠀⢰⣃⡀⠈⢳⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢧⣀⣠⡊⠁⡀⣠⠞⠁⠀⠀⠀⡜⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡜⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠈⠑⢄⢳⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠰⣽⢻⡏⠁⠀⠀⠀⢀⠞⠑⠦⠤⠤⠤⠄⡸⠁⠀⠀⠀⢸⠉⣆⠀⠀⠘⡾⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⠀⠃⠀⠀⠀⢀⢏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡰⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠘⡄⠀⠀⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠑⠦⠤⠤⠄⢲⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣆⣀⣹
July 2022

Timed out for 525 seconds for typing hahaha

twitchquotes: I got timed out for 525 seconds for typing hahaha, In this time I realized that twitch originated from Nazi Germany and thus I grew the most manly pubic hair in my entire life and ate it to sooth my pains. Please no copy seig heil pasta
twitch chat
December 2014
strifecro

spagootie

sometimes i like to pronounce spaghetti as "spagootie" and it has been working out fantastically so far. honestly, this single change has improved my life more than you could ever imagine. i highly suggest everyone try this out and see where your life goes. probably make all your dreams come true in like 5 business days. next time you have a big bowl of piping hot marina drenched pasta in front of you say "spagootie time!!" or maybe something like "im so ready for this spagootie!" and see where the magic will take you.
April 2022
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