[Copypasta] I put sushi in my husband’s butthole while he was asleep

He was sleeping soundly naked, and I was eating leftover sushi. I couldn't help myself. I spread open his cheeks ever so softly, and tucked a slice of Philly roll right next to his puckered asshole. He did not wake up. When he awoke several hours later, he thought he had shit himself. I managed to video him discovering it was in his asshole, and I cannot stop watching him dig salmon, cream cheese, and rice out of his butthole. I also cannot stop laughing. I needed to tell someone.
May 2022
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

NA at worlds

twitchquotes: 4Head No matter how many imports I choose 4Head I still continue to lose 4Head and then I make an excuse 4Head you guessed it right I'm from NA 4Head my screen is always grey 4Head when at worlds I play 4Head
twitch chat
October 2018

League of Legends

EU vs NA

Any fellers?

⢣⣈⣼⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⣀⡀⠄⠄⡀⠄⠄⠰⣶⣦⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢹⣿⣿ ⣜⣩⣽⣿⣿⣿⣭⣉⡛⠻⢷⣄⠈⢷⣦⣀⠘⠻⠷⡈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡷⣤⣲⠙⠂⣼⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠄⠄⢻⣿⣿⡇⣼⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⡉⢀⣀⣰⠟⠻⢮⣉⠛⠷⠄⢸⣿⣿⢣⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⣿⣿⡉⢰⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⢀⢀⠙⢷⣤⠄⢻⡿⠿⣸⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣽⣿⢿⣿⣿⣧⣿⣿⣷⠄⣿⣇⣀⢠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠟⢻⣿⣷⣦⢰⣭⡻⣯⣈⡙⠰⣭⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡣⢃⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣷⣾⡻⢤⣝⡻⢾⣿⡟⢻⣿⣿⣿⡿⡫⢣⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⡙⠻⢿⣧⣭⣀⣀⢁⣀⣾⣿⡿⢟⣵⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠈⠛⠿⠟⢿⣦⣌⣙⣻⣿⡿⣿⣿⠿⣋⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠛⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣴⢛⣛⠛⣿⡛⢛⠛⠛⣿⠛⢻⡟⢛⣿ ⣷⣦⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣤⣴⣿⣿⡟⢩⡽⢀⣿⠁⣼⡇⢰⣿⠄⣿⠇⢸⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣿⣶⣿⣷⣾⣾⠶⠶⢀⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠏⢰⣦⣾⣿⣿⣷⠂⣸⣷⠄⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡷⠄⣶⠏⠱⠆⣀⡟⢀⣿⡇⢸⡟⠁⠶⢀⣷⠄⣨⣤⡌⠐⠶⣦⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡇⢸⣿⡄⠸⠿⣻⡃⠸⢿⠄⠼⣇⠘⠿⢟⡿⠄⣿⣿⠙⠷⠆⣸⣿⣿ ⡟⢛⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
September 2020

Meanwhile in Forsen's mouth

twitchquotes: Meanwhile in Forsen's mouth: ~ KappaPride     ~ KappaPride         ~ KappaPride        ~ KappaPride     ~ KappaPride    ~ KappaPride       ~ KappaPride     ~ KappaPride          ~ KappaPride ~ KappaPride     ~ KappaPride       ~ KappaPride     ~ KappaPride          ~ KappaPride     ~ KappaPride       ~ KappaPride     ~ KappaPride         ~ KappaPride      ~ KappaPride       ~ KappaPride      ~ KappaPride
twitch chat
March 2016
Forsen

Classic

KappaPride

This is exactly why I hate Twitch chat

twitchquotes: This is exactly why I hate Twitch chat (Kripp specifically). This chat is pure, unadulterated, 100% stupidity. Nobody has a single unique, new thought, all spouting the latest meme after meme, that aren't even good. THIS is why I'm turning off chat and will just watch the professional gameplay. And I swear to god, if any of you copy and paste this, I'm deleting my account forever.
twitch chat
November 2016

I hate Twitch Chat

AITA for wanting to play Fortnite?

My mum (82F) told me (12M) to do the dishes (16) but I (12M) was too busy playing Fortnite (3 kills) so I (12M) grabbed my controller (DualShock 4) and threw it at her (138kph). She fucking died, and I (12M) went to prison (18 years). While in prison I (12M) incited several riots (3) and assumed leadership of a gang responsible for smuggling drugs (cocaine) into the country. I (12M) also ordered the assassination of several celebrities (Michael Jackson, Elvis Presley and Jeffrey Epstein) and planned a terrorist attack (9/11). Reddit, AITA?
March 2021

Fortnite

Am I The Asshole?

Text-to-Speech Playing