[Copypasta] I put sushi in my husband’s butthole while he was asleep

He was sleeping soundly naked, and I was eating leftover sushi. I couldn't help myself. I spread open his cheeks ever so softly, and tucked a slice of Philly roll right next to his puckered asshole. He did not wake up. When he awoke several hours later, he thought he had shit himself. I managed to video him discovering it was in his asshole, and I cannot stop watching him dig salmon, cream cheese, and rice out of his butthole. I also cannot stop laughing. I needed to tell someone.
May 2022
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

What is copypasta?

twitchquotes: ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ Copypasta is internet slang for any block of text that gets copied and pasted over and over again, typically disseminated by individuals through online discussion forums and social networking sites. It shares some characteristics with spam in the sense they’re both unsolicited (and often considered a nuisance) ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ
twitch chat
January 2015
Forsen

Bungie messages Dr Lupo about Destiny

twitchquotes: Hi DrLupo, it's Cliff, from Bungie. Yea I work two jobs, it's to afford my sick v6 BMW. Heard you were having some issues connecting to our game. Our records show you aren't on our Streamer Prime servers, with the notes 'Fortnite made you' and 'Tarkov Daddy' Flagged on your account. I regret to inform you only real Destiny streamers can play today. Feel free to submit an appeal, loser.
twitch chat
November 2020
DrLupo

If PLTR hits 35 today

If PLTR hits 35 today I will wipe with quarter ply toilet paper and accidentally discover myself
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Incel Revolutionary Party

twitchquotes: I am going to start a new party called "Incel Revolutionary Party" or "IRP". Almost all women will be taken into concentration camps and they get a handpicked incel boyfriend. The uglier the incel is, the better looking the girl is. Incels that are good looking will only get the fattest and ugliest girlfriends. Non-incels (infidels) will be taken into conversion camps and they will be forced to eat junk food, game all day, never go outside, and never work out. They will be converted to incels. Non-incel women that are against the forced girlfriend laws will also be converted into "incel-allies" by watching state-sponsored propaganda videos that are all about how sad incels are and how much they need girlfriends. There will also be some Chads, Brads and Tyrones that will not be converted into incels because the women who are incels (femcels) will not have to be a forced girlfriend. They will get a free boyfriend. If the chosen chads, brads and tyrones are against the laws, they will also be forced to watch propaganda videos about sad femcels are.
twitch chat
November 2020

xqcK

⠀⠀⠀⣀⣴⠟⠛⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡆⠀ ⠀⢴⣿⣿⢯⣤⠾⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀ ⠀⣾⢿⣛⠊⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠙⠛⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀ ⠀⣰⠞⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⣤⣀⡈⢻⣿⣿⣿⠟⠉⠀⣴ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣶⣶⣤⡀⠀⣠⣶⠀⠀⠈⠉⠙⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠀⣀⣾⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣼⣿⣤⡤⠞⠀⠀⠀⢨⣿⡟⠋⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣁⡀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⢣⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡧⣾⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠉⠉⠁⠀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⡇⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠻⠿⢿⣇⣀⣤⣀⠀⠀⢰⣿⣇⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⠿⣿⣿⢿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠀⠀⠀⣴⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⣤⣤⣀⣀⡀⢀⣀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠀⠀⠉⠉⢉⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
December 2020
xQcOW
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