[Copypasta] Hey! I noticed you used an emoji.

Hey! I noticed you used an emoji. I don’t know if you’re new here, so I’ll let you off the hook this time. Using emojis is frowned upon here on this great site, and for good reason. Instagram normies often use them, and you don’t want to be a normie, do you? If I catch you using an emoji in the future, I’ll be forced to issue a downvote to your comment. Why should you care, you may ask? Well to begin, you will lose karma on your account, which is a useful social status tool and also a way to show others you know your way around Reddit. If you were to continue the use of emojis, I would be forced to privately message you about your slip-up. Any further offenses past that would leave me no other option than to report your account. I don’t think I have to explain why you don’t want that. But anyways, no harm done yet! Follow these simple rules and you’ll enjoy your future on Reddit! Have a blessed (and hopefully emoji-free) day, stranger.
April 2022
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Your social credit score has increased

中华人民共和国寄语] Great work, Citizen! Your social credit score has increased by [5] Integers. Keep up the good work! [ 中华人民共和国寄语] [ 中华人民共和国寄语] Great work, Citizen! Your social credit score has increased by [100] Integers. You can now have priority transport and can now get into prestigious colleges! Keep up the good work! [ 中华人民共和国寄语] [ 中华人民共和国寄语] Great work, Citzen! Your social credit score has increased by [500] Integers. You can now take up official, government job, where we pay you high salary, unlike America. Keep up the good work! [ 中华人民共和国寄语] [ 中华人民共和国寄语] Great work, Citizen! Your social credit score has increased by [1000] Integers. We will ensure you get great salary, good benefits, and good social standing, no matter the means. Keep up the good work! [ 中华人民共和国寄语]Copied! [ 中华人民共和国寄语] Great work, Celebrity! Your social credit score has increased by [5000] Integers. You will be famous across mainland of China, for what you are currently doing. We will make you celebrity, and even better salary. Keep up the good work! [ 中华人民共和国寄语] [ 中华人民共和国寄语] Great work, Celebrity! Your social credit score has increased by [10000] Integers. Xi Jinping would like to meet you personally at Zhongnanhai to encourage your good work. I am sure you notice that you have gained lot of dislike recently. Do not worry. We will send re-education vans to make sure your figure is in good graces. Keep up the good work! [ 中华人民共和国寄语]
October 2021

What if we all spam the same thing?

twitchquotes: 🤔 what 🤔 if 🤔 we 🤔 all 🤔 spam 🤔 the 🤔 same 🤔 thing? 🤔
twitch chat
May 2017

So I’m an AMC shareholder

So I’m an AMC shareholder, which means I own some of the business. Because the stock kept getting halted today I decided to go to my local AMC and support the stock by buying some concessions. I went up to the stand and told the casher (his nametag said Melvin) that I was a shareholder and wanted to support the business. He looked excited and told me to close my eyes and hold out my hand for a surprise shareholder treat. I can’t believe it, but he just covered my hands in liquid butter! Now I’m typing this at home and cant get it off my hands, and my keyboard is all greasy typing this, What do I do?
January 2021

WallStreetBets

Lea moans over Reynad's powerful Hearthstone thighs

twitchquotes: Lᴇᴀ ɪs ᴍᴏᴀɴɪɴɢ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴇᴠᴇʀʏ ᴛʜʀᴜsᴛ ғʀᴏᴍ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴘᴏᴡᴇʀғᴜʟ ʜᴇᴀʀᴛʜsᴛᴏɴᴇ ᴛʜɪɢʜs ᴀɴᴅ 8.5 ɪɴᴄʜ (ғʀᴏᴍ ᴛʜᴇ ʙᴀsᴇ) ᴅᴏɴɢᴇʀ. Sʜᴇ sᴄʀᴇᴀᴍs ᴡʜᴇɴ ʏᴏᴜ ʀᴏʟʟ ʜᴇʀ ᴏᴠᴇʀ ᴀɴᴅ ᴛᴏᴘ ᴅᴇᴄᴋ ʜᴇʀ. Hᴇʀ ᴍᴏɪsᴛ ᴛᴏᴍᴀᴛᴏ sᴀᴜᴄᴇ ɢᴜsʜᴇs ᴀʟʟ ᴏᴠᴇʀ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴘᴇᴘᴘᴇʀᴏɴɪs ᴀs sʜᴇ ʀᴜɴs ʜᴇʀ ғɪɴɢᴇʀɴᴀɪʟs ᴅᴏᴡɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ɴᴀᴋᴇᴅ, ʜᴀɪʀʟᴇss, ʙᴏʏ-ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴄʜᴇsᴛ. Pʟᴇᴀsᴇ ɴᴏ ᴄᴏᴘʏ ᴘᴀsᴛᴇʀɪɴᴏ.
twitch chat
March 2014
Reynad

Johnny Test

⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⡀ ⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⡸⠱⡀ ⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⣠⣴⠖⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⣠⡆⢀⢀⢠⠃⢀⣧ ⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⣤⣾⣿⣿⠋⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⣠⠞⢁⡇⢀⢠⠏⢀⢀⢹ ⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⣠⣶⣿⢿⣿⣿⠃⢀⢀⢀⢀⣠⠞⠁⢀⣼⠁⣠⠏⢀⢀⢀⣿ ⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⣠⣾⡿⠋⢀⣼⡿⠁⢀⢀⢀⣠⠞⠁⢀⢀⢰⢏⡼⠃⢀⢀⢀⢀⡇ ⢀⢀⣾⢀⢀⢀⣼⡿⠋⢀⢀⢀⣿⠃⣀⣠⣶⠿⠃⢀⢀⢀⢀⡿⠋⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢸⠃⢀⣀⣠⠤⠖⠚⠋⢉⡭⠋ ⢀⣼⣿⢀⣠⣿⠟⠁⢀⢀⢀⠘⠛⠛⠋⠉⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⠮⠒⠋⠁⢀⢀⢀⣠⠔⠁ ⢀⡇⢻⣰⡿⠃⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⣠⠞⠁ ⢸⠃⠈⠟⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⡾⠋ ⢸⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⣴⠋ ⢸⡄⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⡾⠁ ⢀⡇⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⣀⣀⣀⣠⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣄⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⡀⢀⢠⡞ ⢀⢳⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⡇⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⣀⣉⡉⢉⡟ ⢀⠘⣄⣀⣀⣤⣤⢀⡇⠰⠶⠶⠶⢶⣶⣶⡶⠶⠶⠶⢀⢀⢀⣼⠿⠟⠛⠿⡿ ⢀⢀⢳⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⡇⢀⢀⡠⠊⠁⣀⣀⠈⠑⣄⢀⢀⢀⣰⡡⠤⠠⢄⣰⠃ ⢀⢀⠈⢏⣉⣀⣀⣸⡇⢀⠸⢀⢀⣾⣿⣿⣷⢀⠘⡄⢀⢠⠏⢠⣤⣤⢀⠹ ⢀⡰⠊⠉⠑⡄⢀⢸⠇⢀⢃⢀⢀⣿⣿⣿⡟⢀⢀⠃⢀⣾⢀⣿⣿⣿⢀⢀⠇ ⢀⠃⠈⠉⢣⠘⠤⠼⢀⢀⠈⢄⢀⠈⠉⠁⢀⣠⠎⢀⡘⠸⡀⠙⠛⠁⢀⢼⡄ ⢀⡀⢀⠐⠎⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⠁⠐⠒⠒⠈⢀⢀⢀⠧⠤⢬⠒⢀⠂⠁⢀⢳ ⢀⠁⠐⠒⠂⠉⠁⠢⣄⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⠒⠤⢤⣀⣀⣐⣒⣒⣉⡠⠤⠂⢀⡴⠃ ⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⠈⠙⢲⣤⣀⡀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⠉⠉⠁⢀⣀⣤⠞⠉ ⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⣦⣬⣇⠈⠉⢿⡒⠶⠶⠶⠶⠶⠚⠛⠉ ⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠸⣿⣷⡀ ⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧ ⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆ ⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⣿⣿⣷⠁ ⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⠚⢻⠛⠻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣀⣹⣟⣿⡆ ⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⡘⢀⢀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢻⣿⣿ ⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⡇⢀⢀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇ ⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⣴⣶⣶⣦⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄ ⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⣿⣏⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠷ ⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⡝⠉⠉⠉⢀⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶ ⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⣇⢠⢠⢀⣾⣆⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟ ⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⣿⢸⢸⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⠘⣾⢸⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧ ⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⠈⣹⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇ ⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆ ⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿ ⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧ ⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡉⢓⣤⣀⡀ ⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠤⠤⠤⠽⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣾⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣤⡄ ⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢒⣒⣂⣀⣉⣦⡀⠈⠉⠉⠙⠛⠛⠛⠋⠉⠉⠉⠉⠁⢸⠁ ⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⡉⠉⠙⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠓⠒⠒⠒⠊ ⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⢀⠇⢀⠈⠉⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠉⠁⢀⠠⡇
January 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing