I hate taking shits. Taking shits is the worst function of the human organism after sex. You have to sit on the most uncomfortable seat ever, then you have to go through so much pain to push the shit out of your asshole (not to mention sometimes they get stuck in there). And as if those weren't enough then you have to wipe, you have to take your hand along with toilet paper and shove it up your asshole, this process can sometimes take minutes out of your life, it fucking sucks.
TL;DR I hate shitting
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
How traders politely decline the second date
I discovered recently if I am on a date and Iβm not that interested in a second, all I need to do is start talking about my stocks. They wonβt ask for another one then, I wonβt have to politely decline.
WallStreetBets
ME ORC ME SPAM
twitchquotes:
ME ORC ME SPAM NO MOD NO BAN
ME ORC ME SPAM NO MOD NO BAN
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MODS
Twitch Viewbot Premium Package
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Hello, thank you for ordering the Twitch Viewbot Premium Package for $550 which will last 2 months and end on 8/13/17. This subscription will have your chat enter life-like messages that are believable and you'll never be suspected! Here are some examples: 
how do you play this game? 
what game is this? Additionally, upgrade for another $50 and earn the message: 
STRIMMER TURN THIS DUMB SHIT OFF
Hello, thank you for ordering the Twitch Viewbot Premium Package for $550 which will last 2 months and end on 8/13/17. This subscription will have your chat enter life-like messages that are believable and you'll never be suspected! Here are some examples: how do you play this game? what game is this? Additionally, upgrade for another $50 and earn the message: STRIMMER TURN THIS DUMB SHIT OFF
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Viewbots
OMG you're so FUNNY so quirky
ππOMG π youβre so FUNNY π€£ π€£ so quirky ππ π€ͺ so different π€©absolute crackhead energy π€ͺπ€ͺ comedic geniusπ§ π I literally canβt β breathe π iβm crying dude ππ that was so hilarious π u really got the whole squad laughing π¨βπ©βπ§βπ¦ππ©βπ©βπ¦βπ¦ππ¨βπ¨βπ§βπ¦ high IQ comedy π§ π§ howβd you come up with that π§π really original work π never seen π or heard π anything like that before π π π great π job ππ keep up the funnies ππ€£π i love you π π youβre my inspiration π€©π€©π€© if only i were as funny π or smart π€ or cool π as you π but its whatever Iβll continue to watch πππ your content π₯π€³ because it βNEVER EVERβ fails to make me laugh ππ thank you π for existing π and doing what you do β€οΈβ€οΈ
Emoji Pasta
Take the Κβ’Ν‘α΄₯β’Κ or the γ½ΰΌΌΰΊΩΝΰΊΰΌ½οΎ
twitchquotes:
ΰΌΌ βΜΏΔΉΜ―βΜΏ ΜΏ ΰΌ½ Hey Kripp, You take the Κβ’Ν‘α΄₯β’Κ - the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the γ½ΰΌΌΰΊΩΝΰΊΰΌ½οΎ - you stay in Dongerland and I show you how deep the arena-hole goes. ΰΌΌ βΜΏΔΉΜ―βΜΏ ΜΏ ΰΌ½
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Kripp