[Copypasta] I hate taking shits

I hate taking shits. Taking shits is the worst function of the human organism after sex. You have to sit on the most uncomfortable seat ever, then you have to go through so much pain to push the shit out of your asshole (not to mention sometimes they get stuck in there). And as if those weren't enough then you have to wipe, you have to take your hand along with toilet paper and shove it up your asshole, this process can sometimes take minutes out of your life, it fucking sucks. TL;DR I hate shitting
April 2022
(โ–€ฬฟฤนฬฏโ”œโ”ฌโ”ดโ”ฌโ”ด Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

I just shit and cum FAQ (Reddit)

I just shit and cum. # FAQ ## What does this mean? The amount of shit (and cum) on my computer and floor has increased by one. ## Why did you do this? There are several reasons I may deem a comment to be worthy of feces or ejaculation. These include, but are not limited to: * Being gay * Dank copypasta bro, where'd you find it * walter ## Am I going to shit and cum too? No - not yet. But you should refrain from shitposting and cumposting like this in the future. Otherwise I will be forced to shit and cum again, which may put your shitting and cumming privileges in jeopardy. ## I don't believe my comment deserved being shit and cum at. Can you un-cum it? Sure, mistakes happen. But only in exceedingly rare circumstances will I put shit back into my butt. If you would like to issue an appeal, shoot me a hot load explaining what I got wrong. I tend to respond to retaliatory ejaculation within several minutes. Do note, however, that over 99.9% of semen dies before it can fertilize the egg, and yours is likely no exception. ## How can I prevent this from happening in the future? Accept the goopy brown and white substance and move on. But learn from this mistake: your behavior will not be tolerated in my mom's basement. I will continue to shit and cum until you improve your conduct. Remember: ejaculation is privilege, not a right.
November 2021

UwU what's this? Nuzzles how are you

twitchquotes: Rawr๐Ÿฒ๐ŸŠ x3๐Ÿ˜‹ nuzzles how are you๐Ÿ˜‰๐Ÿ™‚ pounces on you๐Ÿ˜› youโ€™re๐Ÿ˜ƒ so๐Ÿ˜„ warm๐Ÿค’๐Ÿ˜ˆ o3o๐Ÿ˜ notices๐Ÿ˜ฏ you have a bulge๐Ÿ† o:๐Ÿ˜ฏ๐Ÿ˜ฎ someoneโ€™s happy๐Ÿ˜ƒ ;)๐Ÿ˜‰๐Ÿ˜œ nuzzles your necky wecky๐Ÿ˜ˆ๐Ÿ˜—~ murr~ hehehe๐Ÿ˜Š rubbies๐Ÿ‘‹๐Ÿคš your bulgy๐Ÿ† wolgy youโ€™re๐Ÿ˜Œ so big๐Ÿ˜ฏ๐Ÿ˜ฎ :oooo rubbies๐Ÿ‘‹๐Ÿคš more on your bulgy๐Ÿ† wolgy it๐Ÿšซ doesnโ€™t stop๐Ÿ›‘ growing ยท///ยท ๐Ÿ˜kisses๐Ÿ˜š๐Ÿ˜˜ you๐Ÿ™‚ and lickies๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ‘…๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ
twitch chat
April 2019

Emoji Pasta

Weebs

Purify is not particularly fun or interactive

twitchquotes: Purify created a strategy that revolved around trying to lose to your opponent in one turn without requiring any cards on the board. Silencing your own minions and battles between the players and Blizzard make an overall game of Hearthstone more fun and compelling, but spending 2 mana on a trash card in one turn is not particularly fun or interactive.
twitch chat
August 2016
Reynad

Hearthstone

Lucentbark summon quote

twitchquotes: ๐ŸŒณ THIS ๐ŸŒฒ IS ๐ŸŒด NOT ๐ŸŽ„ YOUR ๐ŸŒฒ HOME ๐ŸŒณ INVADER ๐ŸŒฒ
twitch chat
May 2019

Hearthstone

๐Ÿ‘…HAPPY NEW YEARS SLUTS ๐Ÿ†

๐Ÿ‘ฏhey SlutS! ๐Ÿ‘ฏ๐Ÿ’… Now that we got our yearly ๐ŸŽ FUCK ๐Ÿ‘Š๐Ÿผfrom good ole Saint DICK ๐ŸŽ…๐Ÿพ itโ€™s FINALLY New Years Eve!!!๐Ÿ—“๐Ÿพ๐Ÿ‘… 2๏ธโƒฃ0๏ธโƒฃ2๏ธโƒฃ0๏ธโƒฃ was a LONGG ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ† and HARD ๐Ÿ˜‰โœŠ๐Ÿป๐Ÿ˜ซ year.... we laughed๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿผ We cried ๐Ÿ˜ข๐Ÿ˜–๐Ÿ‘Ž We coughed ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿค’๐Ÿคง we fucked GOOD๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿป dick๐Ÿ† and ๐Ÿ˜ต๐Ÿ˜ตBAD ๐Ÿ˜” dick, ๐Ÿ˜ซ BUTT ๐Ÿ‘ now letโ€™s ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘Celebrate ๐Ÿ™Œ๐ŸŽ‰ and watch that ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ†BIG ๐Ÿ‘… BALL ๐Ÿ˜Ž๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿผ Drop ๐Ÿ‘„๐Ÿ‘„ on us! ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿ’ƒ So spread ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿฝ those ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿฝ legs ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿฝ and count down โฌ‡๏ธ from ๐Ÿ”Ÿ until your man ๐Ÿ’ช๐Ÿพ pops ๐ŸŽ‰ his CORK ๐Ÿพ๐Ÿพ into that thirsty ๐Ÿ‘…thirsty ๐Ÿ‘… hole! ๐Ÿฅฐ๐Ÿฅฐ Send this to 2๏ธโƒฃ1๏ธโƒฃ COCK-BEGGING โœŠ๐Ÿป๐Ÿ† WHORES to get BUTTFUCKED ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ˜ฑ for the next 3๏ธโƒฃ6๏ธโƒฃ5๏ธโƒฃ days ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜
August 2021

Emoji Pasta

New Years

Holiday Emoji

NSFW

Holiday

Text-to-Speech Playing