I hate taking shits. Taking shits is the worst function of the human organism after sex. You have to sit on the most uncomfortable seat ever, then you have to go through so much pain to push the shit out of your asshole (not to mention sometimes they get stuck in there). And as if those weren't enough then you have to wipe, you have to take your hand along with toilet paper and shove it up your asshole, this process can sometimes take minutes out of your life, it fucking sucks.
TL;DR I hate shitting
(โฬฟฤนฬฏโโฌโดโฌโด Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas
Pride month is over.
Pride month is over.
pride month is over. All gay people instantly begin to spontaneously combust, trans people begin to morph into various citrus fruits and are sold as novelty items from a different time. Bisexual people are instantly split in half by the invisible blade of corporate disinterest and the non-bianries are legally banned from using the number 0 in any scenario.
The pride flags and corporate twitter profile pictures are instantly detonated to make room for more advertisements, posters promoting diversity and inclusivity are ripped down and destroyed by once-inclusive teachers all across the country. and the price of lube decreases by an average of 76% worldwide.
Pride month is over. Greed month is upon us. May all who savoured their taste of freedom, cower in the face of pure capitalism, and use the link https://nordvpn.com/superthrash767 when signing up to nord vpn...
Red sus but with emojis (Among Us)
twitchquotes:
Red ๐ด ๐ sus ๐ฆ ๐ฆ. Red ๐ด ๐ด suuuus. I ๐๐ ๐ said ๐ค ๐ฃ ๐ฌ๐ฑ๐ฟ๐ฆ red ๐น ๐ด, sus ๐ฆ ๐ฆ, hahahahaha ๐คฃ ๐คฃ. Why 
arent you ๐๐ฏ ๐ laughing ๐ ๐? I ๐๐ ๐ฅ just made ๐ ๐ a reference ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ to the popular ๐๐๐ ๐ video ๐น ๐น game ๐ฎ ๐ฎ "Among ๐ท๐ด๐ ๐ฐ Us ๐จ ๐จ"! How can you ๐ ๐ not laugh ๐ ๐ at it? Emergeny meeting ๐ฏ ๐ค! Guys ๐ฆ ๐จ, this here guy ๐จ ๐ฑ๐ป๐จ๐ป doesnt laugh ๐คฃ โ๐๐
at my funny ๐๐ ๐บ๐๐ Among ๐ฐ ๐ฐ Us ๐จ ๐จ memes ๐ธ ๐! Lets ๐ ๐ beat โ๐๐ป ๐ฐ๐ him ๐ด ๐จ to death ๐๐ฅโ ๐! Dead ๐๐ โ body ๐ ๐ reported โ ๐ง! Skip ๐ง ๐๐ผ! Skip ๐ง ๐ง! Vote ๐ ๐ blue ๐ ๐! Blue ๐ ๐ was not an impostor ๐ ๐ . Among ๐ ๐๐ฝ๐
ฐ us ๐จ ๐จ in a nutshell ๐ ๐ hahahaha ๐๐๐ ๐. What?! Youre still ๐ค๐ ๐ค๐ not laughing ๐ ๐ your 
ass ๐ ๐
ฐ off ๐ด ๐ดโ ? I ๐ ๐ made ๐ ๐ SEVERAL ๐ฏ ๐ฏ funny ๐๐๐ ๐โ references ๐๐๐ ๐ to Among ๐ฐ ๐๐จโโค๏ธโ๐จ๐ฉโโค๏ธโ๐ฉ Us ๐จ ๐บ๐ธ and YOU ๐๐ผ ๐๐๐ฅ STILL ๐ค๐ ๐ ARENT LAUGHING ๐ ๐๐๐ฆ??!!! Bruh โ ๐ณ๐คฃ๐. Ya ๐๐ผ ๐ hear ๐ ๐ that? Wooooooosh ๐ฆ๐ฝ๐พ ๐ฆ๐ฝ๐พ. Whats ๐ฆ ๐ฆ woooosh ๐ ๐? Oh ๐ ๐, nothing โ ๐ซ. Just the sound ๐ ๐ of a joke ๐ ๐ flying โ โ over ๐ณ๐๐ฆ ๐ your head ๐ ๐. Whats ๐ฆ that? You ๐ think ๐ญ ๐ญ im ๐ ๐ annoying ๐ ๐ ? Kinda ๐
๐
sus ๐ฆ ๐ฆ, bro ๐ ๐โบ๐ฌ. Hahahaha ๐ ๐! Anyway ๐ ๐, yea ๐ ๐ฏ, gotta go ๐ ๐ do tasks โ ๐. Hahahaha ๐ ๐!
arent you ๐๐ฏ ๐ laughing ๐ ๐? I ๐๐ ๐ฅ just made ๐ ๐ a reference ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ to the popular ๐๐๐ ๐ video ๐น ๐น game ๐ฎ ๐ฎ "Among ๐ท๐ด๐ ๐ฐ Us ๐จ ๐จ"! How can you ๐ ๐ not laugh ๐ ๐ at it? Emergeny meeting ๐ฏ ๐ค! Guys ๐ฆ ๐จ, this here guy ๐จ ๐ฑ๐ป๐จ๐ป doesnt laugh ๐คฃ โ๐๐
at my funny ๐๐ ๐บ๐๐ Among ๐ฐ ๐ฐ Us ๐จ ๐จ memes ๐ธ ๐! Lets ๐ ๐ beat โ๐๐ป ๐ฐ๐ him ๐ด ๐จ to death ๐๐ฅโ ๐! Dead ๐๐ โ body ๐ ๐ reported โ ๐ง! Skip ๐ง ๐๐ผ! Skip ๐ง ๐ง! Vote ๐ ๐ blue ๐ ๐! Blue ๐ ๐ was not an impostor ๐ ๐ . Among ๐ ๐๐ฝ๐
ฐ us ๐จ ๐จ in a nutshell ๐ ๐ hahahaha ๐๐๐ ๐. What?! Youre still ๐ค๐ ๐ค๐ not laughing ๐ ๐ your ass ๐ ๐
ฐ off ๐ด ๐ดโ ? I ๐ ๐ made ๐ ๐ SEVERAL ๐ฏ ๐ฏ funny ๐๐๐ ๐โ references ๐๐๐ ๐ to Among ๐ฐ ๐๐จโโค๏ธโ๐จ๐ฉโโค๏ธโ๐ฉ Us ๐จ ๐บ๐ธ and YOU ๐๐ผ ๐๐๐ฅ STILL ๐ค๐ ๐ ARENT LAUGHING ๐ ๐๐๐ฆ??!!! Bruh โ ๐ณ๐คฃ๐. Ya ๐๐ผ ๐ hear ๐ ๐ that? Wooooooosh ๐ฆ๐ฝ๐พ ๐ฆ๐ฝ๐พ. Whats ๐ฆ ๐ฆ woooosh ๐ ๐? Oh ๐ ๐, nothing โ ๐ซ. Just the sound ๐ ๐ of a joke ๐ ๐ flying โ โ over ๐ณ๐๐ฆ ๐ your head ๐ ๐. Whats ๐ฆ that? You ๐ think ๐ญ ๐ญ im ๐ ๐ annoying ๐ ๐ ? Kinda ๐
๐
sus ๐ฆ ๐ฆ, bro ๐ ๐โบ๐ฌ. Hahahaha ๐ ๐! Anyway ๐ ๐, yea ๐ ๐ฏ, gotta go ๐ ๐ do tasks โ ๐. Hahahaha ๐ ๐!
twitch chat
Among Us / Amogus
The pandemic in 2028 is kinda sus
Year is 2028 The pandemic has gotten so bad we are all forced to wear colored isolation suits with their own oxygen tank and no hands for contact. Those infected are turned into sociopathic murders that try to secretly kill everyone, but still dress and act like the rest of us. I work as a spaceship engineer in the Skled along with 9 other people. We just got notified that one among us was infected, but we still have to keep maintaining the ship otherwise it will explode. We are trying to figure out who it is by voting. 2 of us are already dead and i saw red vent, but nobody believes me. I think the others want to vote me off. This might be the last thing i'll write. Goodbye. Tell me wife i love her.
Among Us / Amogus
Coronavirus
COVID
AITA for ending my marriage over Animal Crossing??
I (65m) and my wife 24(f) have been together for 8 years, married for 4. All my friends are jealous that i was able to score such a hot young woman but itโs starting to cause some problems in our relationship believe it or not.
When the pandemic hit, I was very nervous since Iโm not in great health. We decided to buy the Nintendo Switch and play this game called Animal Crossing. I guess itโs popular with the kids?
Anywho, we start building this town and everything was fine at first. Then, my wife decides that she wants to remodel the town. No problem. But she starts cutting down all the trees, destroying the cliffs, removing the river, etc... I told her this is out of line. We should respect nature not destroy it. Her answer? It was ugly and she didnโt like to walk the long way around.
She also takes all of my hard earned money from fishing and gambles it all away on turnip stocks. Last week she spent 400k on turnips and sold them for 260k. Do you know how many red snappers I need to catch to make that back up? Iโm trying to retire soon and itโs making me think she doesnโt know how to manage money.
What really drove me to the breaking point, my best friend Boon is on the island and we really get along. He likes to lift weights, so do I. I log into the game one day and build him a gift. When I try to find him, heโs nowhere to be found... I ask, where is boon? She doesnโt answer. Where is Boon ?? She says โI kicked him off the island, he was annoyingโ. Reddit, she kicked my best friend off the island without even talking to me.
The next day I filed for divorce and kicked her out. Iโm keeping the switch and rebuilding our town. Hopefully Boon comes back. AITA or did I doge a bullet with my sociopathic (ex)wife?
Edit: Thank you all for the support and messages over the last 24hrs. Itโs been a wild day but the good news is that after a few hours of island hopping I was able to find Boon and convince him to come back to my island. Seems like things are heading in the right direction.