[Copypasta] I hate taking shits

I hate taking shits. Taking shits is the worst function of the human organism after sex. You have to sit on the most uncomfortable seat ever, then you have to go through so much pain to push the shit out of your asshole (not to mention sometimes they get stuck in there). And as if those weren't enough then you have to wipe, you have to take your hand along with toilet paper and shove it up your asshole, this process can sometimes take minutes out of your life, it fucking sucks. TL;DR I hate shitting
April 2022
What happened to this ad? :(
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Lonely Moby Dick

twitchquotes: So in Moby Dick why does Captain Ahab never consider that the whale is just lonely and looking for love? Clearly it's been through a lot from the scarring and probably wants to settle down in it's golden years. Personnally, if i were captain, i would have been a good human and take 2 and a half feet of whale cock to ease his pain
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June 2020

not an weeb thing

twitchquotes: β€˜not an weeb thing’. try living a day in my shoes, walking around terrified of encountering normal people everywhere i go. wherever i look, people with tv show merch, people speaking english. it makes me and millions of other weebs out there feel really attacked.
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February 2019

Steve Yuen "You Are Gay"

Have you even been walking down the street with your best bro, and while you're walking you accidentally touch hands. You think to yourself, "that was weird, but, I'm not gay". You are. You are gay.
June 2021

My son got kicked out of school

twitchquotes: My son got kicked out of school for letting a girl jerk him off in class. That's three schools now. Maybe teaching isn't for him. FeelsBadMan
twitch chat
August 2017

Spooky skeleton

▒▒▒░░░░░░░░░░▄▐░░░░ β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–€β–ˆβ–€β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–„β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–„ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–€ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–„β–„β–„β–β–Œβ–€β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–„β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–β–Œβ–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–Œβ–€β–„β–€β–„β–€β–β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–Œβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘
November 2014

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