PLEASE HELP!!! Recently my wife has introduced me to a streaming platform known as twitch. I got so into it I spent a full week only watching my favorite twitch streamers like pokimane and sukkuno. All was well until February 15th where I was having a very important presentation at my job. All eyes were on me when I instinctively said KEKW with a straight face and veins bulging through my neck; I burst out of the workplace so fast my shoes fell off and I slammed into my car so hard I created a sonic boost in the wind and cried to myself saying sadCHAMP. Last Saturday was my grandmas funeral and guess WHAT? I SAID F IN THE CHAT GIVING MY MEMORIAL SPEECH. ARRRGGHHHH I HATE TWITCHC ITS RUINING MY LIFE!!!!1!!1!
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
See you in court
twitchquotes:
Hello Kripp, this is Anne, just letting you know that the DNA test came back positive and I will be seeing you in court to get my child support. Oh and btw she is now 4 years old and asking where is daddy ***, either way see you in court..
twitch chat
Kripp
Came on the spider to kill it
twitchquotes:
🕷I🕷was🕷masturbating🕷one🕷time🕷but🕷then🕷I🕷saw🕷a🕷spider🕷and🕷it🕷freaked🕷me🕷out🕷so🕷I🕷came🕷on🕷the🕷spider🕷in🕷order🕷to🕷kill🕷it🕷
twitch chat
Emoji Pasta
I was born with glass bones and paper skin
twitchquotes:
I was born with glass bones and paper skin. Every morning I break my legs, and every afternoon I break my arms. At night, I lie awake in agony until my heart attacks put me to sleep.
I was born with glass bones and paper skin. Every morning I break my legs, and every afternoon I break my arms. At night, I lie awake in agony until my heart attacks put me to sleep.
twitch chat
Gold Cards should have a slight buff
twitchquotes:
I feel like Gold Cards should have a slight buff, like +1 attack or -1 mana or something... not that big of a change, just so it’d make Gold Cards worth it..
twitch chat
Hearthstone
TIME TO MINE MORE MONEY FOR TWITCH
twitchquotes:
⛏ ⛏ 
💵 TIME TO MINE MORE MONEY FOR TWITCH ⛏ 💵 TIME TO MINE MORE MONEY FOR TWITCH ⛏ 💵 TIME TO MINE MORE MONEY FOR TWITCH ⛏ 💵
💵 TIME TO MINE MORE MONEY FOR TWITCH ⛏ 💵 TIME TO MINE MORE MONEY FOR TWITCH ⛏ 💵 TIME TO MINE MORE MONEY FOR TWITCH ⛏ 💵
twitch chat
TwitchPresents