PLEASE HELP!!! Recently my wife has introduced me to a streaming platform known as twitch. I got so into it I spent a full week only watching my favorite twitch streamers like pokimane and sukkuno. All was well until February 15th where I was having a very important presentation at my job. All eyes were on me when I instinctively said KEKW with a straight face and veins bulging through my neck; I burst out of the workplace so fast my shoes fell off and I slammed into my car so hard I created a sonic boost in the wind and cried to myself saying sadCHAMP. Last Saturday was my grandmas funeral and guess WHAT? I SAID F IN THE CHAT GIVING MY MEMORIAL SPEECH. ARRRGGHHHH I HATE TWITCHC ITS RUINING MY LIFE!!!!1!!1!
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
Papparrian is proud of Kripparrian
twitch chat
Kripp
The Cocklock Deck
twitchquotes:
Hey Kripp, its the "cocklock" you just beat. I'm on the phone with my mom right now, and she isn't very happy with you. She is coming over now to comfort me, and then we are going to have to report you to the police. I hope you enjoy jail.
twitch chat
Kripp
STOP POSTING ABOUT SQUID GAME!
STOP POSTING ABOUT SQUID GAME! I'M TIRED OF SEEING IT, MY FRIENDS ON TIK TOK SEND ME MEMES, ON DISCORD ITS FUCKING MEMES. I was in a server, right? AND ALL OF THE CHANNELS ARE JUST SQUID GAME STUFF. I SHOWED MY NEW TRACKSUIT TO MY GIRLFRIEND AND I SAID "hey babe, I'm on squid game." HAHA MUGUNGHWA KKOCHI PIOTASEUMNIDA, I FUCKING LOOKED AT A MAN GETTING SHOT AND SAID, "Uh oh, he failed this game!" I LOOKED AT THE HEAD OF MY PENIS, I THINK OF THE SUPERVISOR'S MASK AND I GO "PENIS? MORE LIKE PENSUPERVISOR," AAAAAAAAA
Squid Game
So as a joke, I fucked my friend in a trollface cosplay
So as a joke, I went to my friend's house wearing a trollface mask and black morph suit. I could barely stop my laughter as he went as red as your mother (after I have sexual intercourse with her) and looked at me from head to toe with a bit of drool in his mouth. The way he stared made me feel a bit funny too, but I decided to tease him more by taking off my morph suit. He asked me, "Are you serious?" and I said "Cover yourself in oil."
He went silent for what seemed like forever, so I asked him, "You mad bro?" He said he's confused, but then his boner got really hard, which made me take off his clothes. I expected him to scream, "Stop!" as I kissed him and stroked his cock, but he instead shouted "We do a little trolling!" which made me get a boner myself. Before I knew it, I was blowing him for the first time till he came.
His semen was so thick, it got stuck inside my throat no matter how hard I swallowed. He then said, "I want to fuck you now!" and seeing that we've already gone that far and we were both naked, I obliged. A few hours later, the jerk went all pale and said to me "Why did we do that? Now I'm not fucking straight." But he still looked so cute all confused like that, so I took pity on him and reassured while wiping his cum off my face, "Let's just pretend I'm still Trollface."
NSFW
All MOBAs copied Pong
twitchquotes:
DotA, LoL, HoN and HoTS are just a copy of Pong, and Pong is a copy of tennis
twitch chat
Reynad