[Copypasta] Twitch is ruining my life!

PLEASE HELP!!! Recently my wife has introduced me to a streaming platform known as twitch. I got so into it I spent a full week only watching my favorite twitch streamers like pokimane and sukkuno. All was well until February 15th where I was having a very important presentation at my job. All eyes were on me when I instinctively said KEKW with a straight face and veins bulging through my neck; I burst out of the workplace so fast my shoes fell off and I slammed into my car so hard I created a sonic boost in the wind and cried to myself saying sadCHAMP. Last Saturday was my grandmas funeral and guess WHAT? I SAID F IN THE CHAT GIVING MY MEMORIAL SPEECH. ARRRGGHHHH I HATE TWITCHC ITS RUINING MY LIFE!!!!1!!1!
March 2022
Waiting for adblock to be disabled
More Copypastas

Hey Kripp, how's it going, Faeria Dev here

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, how's it going, Faeria Dev here. We noticed that your streams are interesting and entertaining. To fix this issue, we have decided to offer you money to play our very uninteresting and boring card game that is clearly a clone of Hearthstone. We look foward to future business with you and hope that you can sellout out a little bit more in the future. ResidentSleeper
twitch chat
April 2016
Kripp

A teacher asked the class, "what is SEX?"

A teacher asked the class, "what is SEX?" Johnny got up and said, "Sex is a TEMPTATION which causes a SENSATION when a boy sticks his LOCATION into a girl's DESTINATION which increases the POPULATION for the next GENERATION. Do you get my EXPLANATION? or do you need a DEMONSTRATION?" The teacher fainted.
April 2021

Pepega

⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁⠐⢶⣶⣶⣶⣤⣤⡀⠁⠁⣠⣀⣀⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁ ⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁⠙⢿⣯⣠⣶⣦⣤⣤⣌⣛⠻⢇⣠⣤⣤⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁ ⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁⠻⣿⣿⣿⡟⢉⡤⢤⣤⣤⡍⠛⢡⢖⣥⣶⣦⣀⠁⠁ ⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁⣠⣿⣿⣿⡏⣭⣶⣿⣿⠟⢿⣦⡡⣿⣿⡇⠁⡙⣷⡀ ⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁⣀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡞⣿⣿⡟⢀⡀⣿⣿⢻⣿⣿⣀⣁⣿⠏ ⠁⠁⠁⢀⣠⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⢰⢻⣿⣇⣈⣴⣿⠟⢨⣛⠛⠛⠉⠁⠁ ⠁⣠⣶⣿⣿⡟⢋⠤⣤⠘⢿⣿⣧⡙⠻⠌⠒⠙⠛⢛⣫⣥⣿⣦⡈⠉⣡⣴⣾⠇ ⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⡇⠁⠙⠷⣤⡙⠻⢿⣿⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠟⠋⠁⠁ ⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠻⣄⠁⣀⡀⠉⠙⠒⠂⠉⠍⠉⠉⠉⠉⣩⣍⣁⣂⡈⠠⠂⠁⠁ ⠁⠘⢿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡉⠳⢬⣛⠷⢦⡄⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁⣀⣼⣿⣿⠿⠛⠋⠁⠁⠁⠁ ⠁⠁⠁⠉⠻⢿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣬⣍⣓⡒⠒⣒⣂⣠⡬⠽⠓⠂⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁⠁
November 2018

Pepe

Anime is literally the best thing ever

Anime is literally the best thing ever. All of you baka Americans who can't wrap your minds around it because you think your Hollywood films and TV shows you are just stupid and wrong and need to stop speaking. Literally nobody likes your opinions except the other baka Americans that don't understand Anime culture and the fact that Anime is truly a masterpiece of art, emotion and plot development. The characters always develop so well and so does the plot and it is just like really good. Like literally just watch it and you will understand you stupid white people. Ok, I am white but like I like anime so I'm basically Japanese at this point. Anyways, back to the subject, have you ever heard of the best anime ever, Redo of Healer...
February 2022

Anime

Weebs

Germany scores on Brazil

twitchquotes: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Every 60 seconds in Brazil, Germany scores a goal. Together we can stop this. Please spread the word ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
twitch chat
July 2014
imaqtpie
Text-to-Speech Playing