[Copypasta] Twitch is ruining my life!

PLEASE HELP!!! Recently my wife has introduced me to a streaming platform known as twitch. I got so into it I spent a full week only watching my favorite twitch streamers like pokimane and sukkuno. All was well until February 15th where I was having a very important presentation at my job. All eyes were on me when I instinctively said KEKW with a straight face and veins bulging through my neck; I burst out of the workplace so fast my shoes fell off and I slammed into my car so hard I created a sonic boost in the wind and cried to myself saying sadCHAMP. Last Saturday was my grandmas funeral and guess WHAT? I SAID F IN THE CHAT GIVING MY MEMORIAL SPEECH. ARRRGGHHHH I HATE TWITCHC ITS RUINING MY LIFE!!!!1!!1!
March 2022
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

You have been hand picked to be recruited by the FBI

twitchquotes: Hey YOU. Yes YOU! You are the only one who can see this message. You have been hand picked to be recruited by the FBI. But in order to hire you we need to know that you are on your alert, even if it comes to text in a chat box. Please copy and paste this so we know that you have seen it. Good luck and God Bless.
twitch chat
April 2015
Kripp

Pog

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September 2020

I thought Jerma dreams were BS... until the other night

I thought Jerma dreams were BS... until the other night. I know I know. Another "I had a dream about Jerma" post. I've been thinking about whether or not to post this for the last 3 days, since everyone and their grandmas are doing these posts. But whatever. Three nights ago I dreamt that I was watching a jerma stream and he did something so utterly hilarious that I bursted out laughing so hard that I actually woke up from it. I looked for my phone to write down what he was doing (because it was 2 am and I needed to go back to sleep) but I couldn't find it for the life of me. Then in the corner of my eye a webcam appeared and it was Jerma laughing his ass off saying "chat he can't find it" and "he doesn't know pepeface". I was still dreaming lmao. I saw chat and it was just a wall of OMEGALULs. The whole situation was hilarious so then I woke up for real this time. Unfortunately because of the nature of the dream I can't remember what he was doing originally that was so funny. I think he was choking on a piece of bread or something.
March 2022
Jerma985

Crayon Shin Chan

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September 2021

Ukrainian President asks Kripp for help

twitchquotes: Κœα΄‡ΚŸΚŸα΄, α΄‹Κ€Ιͺα΄˜α΄˜α΄€Κ€Κ€Ιͺɴᴏ, α΄›ΚœΙͺs Ιͺs α΄œα΄‹Κ€α΄€Ι΄Ιͺα΄€Ι΄ α΄˜Κ€α΄‡sΙͺᴅᴇɴᴛ α΄ΚŸα΄‡α΄‹sα΄€Ι΄α΄…Κ€ α΄›α΄œΚ€α΄„ΚœΚΙ΄α΄α΄ Ιͺɴᴏ. α΄α΄œΚ€ α΄˜α΄‡α΄α΄˜ΚŸα΄‡ ᴀʀᴇ ʙᴇΙͺΙ΄Ι’ α΄α΄˜α΄˜Κ€α΄‡ssᴇᴅ ʙʏ Κ€α΄œssΙͺα΄€ α΄€Ι΄α΄… α΄α΄œΚ€ α΄„Ιͺα΄›Ιͺᴒᴇɴs ɴᴇᴇᴅ ᴏʀᴀɴɒᴇ ᴊᴜΙͺᴄᴇ. α΄˜ΚŸα΄‡α΄€sᴇ sᴇɴᴅ ᴏᴊ. α΄˜ΚŸα΄‡α΄€sᴇ ɴᴏ α΄€ΚŸ α΄˜α΄€α΄„Ιͺɴᴏ.
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March 2014
Kripp
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