[Copypasta] Twitch is ruining my life!

PLEASE HELP!!! Recently my wife has introduced me to a streaming platform known as twitch. I got so into it I spent a full week only watching my favorite twitch streamers like pokimane and sukkuno. All was well until February 15th where I was having a very important presentation at my job. All eyes were on me when I instinctively said KEKW with a straight face and veins bulging through my neck; I burst out of the workplace so fast my shoes fell off and I slammed into my car so hard I created a sonic boost in the wind and cried to myself saying sadCHAMP. Last Saturday was my grandmas funeral and guess WHAT? I SAID F IN THE CHAT GIVING MY MEMORIAL SPEECH. ARRRGGHHHH I HATE TWITCHC ITS RUINING MY LIFE!!!!1!!1!
March 2022
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Donald Trump answers what is 2+2?

Donald Trump answers the question: What is 2+2? "I have to say a lot of people have been asking this question. No, really. A lot of people come up to me and they ask me. They say, "What's 2+2"? And I tell them look, we know what 2+2 is. We've had almost eight years of the worst kind of math you can imagine. Oh my god, I can't believe it. Addition and subtraction of the 1s the 2s and the 3s. Its terrible. Its just terrible. Look, if you want to know what 2+2 is, do you want to know what 2+2 is? I'll tell you. First of all the number 2, by the way I love the number 2. It's probably my favorite number, no it is my favorite number. You know what, it's probably more like the number two but with a lot of zeros behind it. A lot. If I'm being honest, I mean, if I'm being honest. I like a lot of zeros. Except for Marco Rubio, now he's a zero that I don't like. Though, I probably shouldn't say that. He's a nice guy but he's like, "10101000101", on and on, like that. He's like a computer! You know what I mean? He's like a computer. I don't know. I mean, you know. So, we have all these numbers and we can add them and subtract them and add them. TIMES them even. Did you know that? We can times them OR divide them, they don't tell you that, and I'll tell you, no one is better at the order of operations than me. You wouldn't believe it. That I can tell you. So, we're gonna be the best on 2+2, believe me. OK? Alright. Thank you."
October 2016

Donald Trump

Ram Ranch lyrics

18 naked cowboys in the showers at Ram Ranch! Big hard throbbing ccks wanting to be sucked! 18 naked cowboys wanting to be fcked! Cowboys in the showers at Ram Ranch! On their knees wanting to suck cowboy c*cks! Ram Ranch really rocks! Hot hard buff cowboys their ccks throbbing hard! 18 more wild cowboys out in the yard! Big bulging ccks ever so hard! Orgy in the showers at Ram Ranch! Big hard throbbing c*cks ramming cowboy butt! Like a breeding ram wanting to rut! Big hard throbbing ccks getting sucked real deep! Cowboys even getting fcked in their sleep! Ram Ranch, it rocks! Cowboys love big hard throbbing c*cks! 18 naked cowboys in the showers at Ram Ranch! Big hard throbbing ccks wanting to be sucked! 18 naked cowboys wanting to be fcked! Cowboys in the showers at Ram Ranch! On their knees wanting to suck cowboy c*cks! Ram Ranch really rocks! Hot hard buff cowboys their ccks throbbing hard! 18 more wild cowboys out in the yard! Big bulging ccks ever so hard! Orgy in the showers at Ram Ranch! Big hard throbbing c*cks ramming cowboy butt! Like a breeding ram wanting to rut! 18 naked cowboys in the showers at Ram Ranch! Big hard throbbing ccks wanting to be sucked! 18 naked cowboys wanting to be fcked! Cowboys in the showers at Ram Ranch! On their knees wanting to suck cowboy c*cks! Ram Ranch really rocks! Big hard throbbing ccks getting sucked real deep! Cowboys even getting fcked in their sleep! Ram Ranch, it rocks! Cowboys love big hard throbbing c*cks!
April 2021

Ebettle

twitchquotes: I was offered sex today, with a 21 year old girl. In exchange for that, I was supposed to advertise some kind of e-betting website to my friends. Of course I declined because I am a person of high moral standards with a strong willpower. Just as strong as Ebettle, the best betting website on the internet. Now available for children.
twitch chat
March 2015

sellout

Classic

SHOW YOUR KNEECAPS TO THE WORLD QTPIE

twitchquotes: All my life has led to this one moment. It could happen. But it could also dissipate before my very eyes. This is it. This is MY DREAM. Show them to me Qtpie, fuck dude, SHOW THEM TO THE WORLD! KNEECAPS. We all know you have them. NOW GIVE THEM TO ME. Plz no copy pasterino....
twitch chat
August 2014
imaqtpie

SAVE THE INTERNET

twitchquotes: "SAVE THE INTERNET" refers to the imminent removal of net neutrality, which requires Internet Service Providers (ISPs) to treat the provision of internet service as a UTILITY not a LUXURY, thereby requiring them to provide it FAIRLY to EVERYONE, and not just people/businesses who pay premiums to receive the same service as before. It also restricts them from unfairly throttling speeds and access to specific websites. If net neutrality is abolished, Twitch will be inaccessible to most Americans.
twitch chat
July 2017
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