[Copypasta] Twitch is ruining my life!

PLEASE HELP!!! Recently my wife has introduced me to a streaming platform known as twitch. I got so into it I spent a full week only watching my favorite twitch streamers like pokimane and sukkuno. All was well until February 15th where I was having a very important presentation at my job. All eyes were on me when I instinctively said KEKW with a straight face and veins bulging through my neck; I burst out of the workplace so fast my shoes fell off and I slammed into my car so hard I created a sonic boost in the wind and cried to myself saying sadCHAMP. Last Saturday was my grandmas funeral and guess WHAT? I SAID F IN THE CHAT GIVING MY MEMORIAL SPEECH. ARRRGGHHHH I HATE TWITCHC ITS RUINING MY LIFE!!!!1!!1!
March 2022
I used to be a real ad
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Kurumx's head with a bird

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HADOUKEN

twitchquotes: ༼つಠ益ಠ༽つ ─=≡ΣO)) HADOUKEN
twitch chat
December 2014
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Get a life nerds

twitchquotes: Honestly though, copy-pasting the same thing over and over again, how dumb can all of you be? The more i post it, the funnier it gets ResidentSleeper You guys are so easy to trick into spamming. Get a life nerds
twitch chat
November 2019

Please don't use Kappa

twitchquotes: I am from Japan and was raised hearing terrifying stories about kappas from my grandfather. Those are horrible turtle-like monsters who lure and kill children. And then I join this site and see you use it as a joke with a grey faced man. This is not right! I am scared of using the chat now, bringing me bad memories. Please, don't use that emote.
twitch chat
September 2020

Saitama

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May 2019
Text-to-Speech Playing