[Copypasta] Twitch is ruining my life!

PLEASE HELP!!! Recently my wife has introduced me to a streaming platform known as twitch. I got so into it I spent a full week only watching my favorite twitch streamers like pokimane and sukkuno. All was well until February 15th where I was having a very important presentation at my job. All eyes were on me when I instinctively said KEKW with a straight face and veins bulging through my neck; I burst out of the workplace so fast my shoes fell off and I slammed into my car so hard I created a sonic boost in the wind and cried to myself saying sadCHAMP. Last Saturday was my grandmas funeral and guess WHAT? I SAID F IN THE CHAT GIVING MY MEMORIAL SPEECH. ARRRGGHHHH I HATE TWITCHC ITS RUINING MY LIFE!!!!1!!1!
March 2022
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Why do so many people watch this washed up player?

twitchquotes: Why do so many people watch this washed up player? He is so bad at this game. Why is his hair so long? Does hair length have a connection to a players skill? Is that why girls are so bad at league?
twitch chat
December 2017
imaqtpie

League of Legends

Daddy, are the Spammers gone?

twitchquotes: โ”ปโ”ณ| โ€ข.โ€ข) Daddy, are the Spammers Gone? โ”ปโ”ณ|(า‚`_ยด) ,๏ธปโ•ฆโ•คโ”€ า‰ NOPE,SON GET BACK IN YOUR BEDROOM
twitch chat
February 2016
Riot Games

Kripp gets in trouble exploiting Noz and jousting

twitchquotes: (ยทฬฟฤนฬฏยทฬฟ ฬฟ)" Kripp, This is Officer Dongerino of the Blizzard PD. We need to question you about your Noz deck and jousting exploit. If any of you copy and paste this, you will be subject to banning from Blizzard games forever. Come with me, Kripp (ยทฬฟฤนฬฏยทฬฟ ฬฟ)
twitch chat
September 2015
Kripp

Hearthstone

If my Bitcoin and my girl both drowning

twitchquotes: If my Bitcoin๐Ÿ’ฒ๐Ÿ’ฐ and my girl๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ‘ฐ both drowning๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐ŸŒŠ and I could only save one๐Ÿ˜ค๐Ÿ˜ฌ Catch me HODL'ing at my girls funeral๐Ÿ˜”๐Ÿ‘ป๐ŸŒน Cuz its To The Moon or Nothing, kiddo ๐Ÿ’ฐ๐Ÿ’ฏ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ˜Ž๐Ÿ“ˆ๐Ÿ’ฒ
twitch chat
January 2018

Elephant

โ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“(O)โ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆ โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆ
November 2014
Text-to-Speech Playing