PLEASE HELP!!! Recently my wife has introduced me to a streaming platform known as twitch. I got so into it I spent a full week only watching my favorite twitch streamers like pokimane and sukkuno. All was well until February 15th where I was having a very important presentation at my job. All eyes were on me when I instinctively said KEKW with a straight face and veins bulging through my neck; I burst out of the workplace so fast my shoes fell off and I slammed into my car so hard I created a sonic boost in the wind and cried to myself saying sadCHAMP. Last Saturday was my grandmas funeral and guess WHAT? I SAID F IN THE CHAT GIVING MY MEMORIAL SPEECH. ARRRGGHHHH I HATE TWITCHC ITS RUINING MY LIFE!!!!1!!1!
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
James Patterson plays Druid
twitchquotes:
The date is December 19th, 2018, at 630 am. James Patterson has just finished making his morning coffee. James Patterson hates his job, but looks forward each morning to playing ladder with the one deck he could afford to craft: Druid. On turn two, he attempts to drag Wild Growth onto the battlefield. He rubs his eyes, and to his horror sees that the card now costs 3 mana. With nothing left to live for, James Patterson opens his apartment window and buys a subaru.
twitch chat
Hearthstone
forsenCD
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Forsen
Emote
Streamer is a Hydraposter
twitchquotes:
I feel that when I post Hydras in [streamer name]'s stream, he secretly enjoys it. First, Nightbot's symbol spamming feature is disabled. Second, the slight sardonic intonation in his voice leads me to suspect that he thinks it's funny. Furthermore, I only ever get 24 hour bans for summoning. If he truly had distain for the Holy Hydra, he would just permaban all the followers. Instead, deep down, I feel [streamer name] is a Hydraposter.
twitch chat
The Bola
twitchquotes:
QT this is your Dr. It seems your subs have all gotten not only "The Bola" but also type 2 diabetes. I believe it is the combination of missed arrows and you to wanting become a pizza. Stop before you also get The Bola.
twitch chat
imaqtpie
League of Legends
Babe im breaking up with u
twitchquotes:
babe, i'm breaking up with you. it's not you, you were poggers. it's me, i'm omegalul. im sorry if this is pepehands but it has to be done, i've just been feeling pepega and our relationship has been weirdchamp for months, it's time to end it, no kappa.
twitch chat