[Copypasta] Twitch is ruining my life!

PLEASE HELP!!! Recently my wife has introduced me to a streaming platform known as twitch. I got so into it I spent a full week only watching my favorite twitch streamers like pokimane and sukkuno. All was well until February 15th where I was having a very important presentation at my job. All eyes were on me when I instinctively said KEKW with a straight face and veins bulging through my neck; I burst out of the workplace so fast my shoes fell off and I slammed into my car so hard I created a sonic boost in the wind and cried to myself saying sadCHAMP. Last Saturday was my grandmas funeral and guess WHAT? I SAID F IN THE CHAT GIVING MY MEMORIAL SPEECH. ARRRGGHHHH I HATE TWITCHC ITS RUINING MY LIFE!!!!1!!1!
March 2022
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Easter emoji pasta

HEY ALL U EASTER BUNNY๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿฐ HOES!!! Today is ๐ŸŽ‰๐ŸŽ‰Easter!! You know what that means๐Ÿค”๐Ÿค”๐Ÿค”??? Itโ€™s time to HOP over to DADDYS house so he can FUCK๐Ÿ˜ซ๐Ÿ˜ซ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ u like a rabbit!! Gotta get those Easter day cummies!! After u and daddy FUCK ๐Ÿ˜ซ๐Ÿ’ฆ then itโ€™s time for โ›ช๏ธchurchโ›ช๏ธ!!! Get ready for that HOLY DICK๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ because jesus is CUMMING๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ’ฆ back from the dead today to FUCK THAT EASTER BUNNY PUSSY๐Ÿ‡๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜‰. Then itโ€™s time for the egg hunt ๐Ÿ•ต๐Ÿ•ต๐Ÿ•ต!!! U better find an egg!! Search in every HOLE๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜ฉ CRACK ๐Ÿ˜ซ๐Ÿ˜ and CREVICE ๐Ÿค—๐Ÿ˜‰๐Ÿ˜ for the GRAND PRIZE ๐Ÿค‘๐Ÿ˜‡ getting that ๐Ÿต๐ŸŒธ๐ŸŒบPASTEL PUSSY๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿฃ๐ŸŒฎ RODE ๐Ÿ‡๐Ÿ‡๐Ÿ‡ into the Easter sunset! Send this to all ur other EASTER BUNNY๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿฐ HOES๐Ÿ‘„๐Ÿ˜ซ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ’ฆ. If u get 5๏ธโƒฃ back ur a ROTTEN COLORED EGG!!! If u get ๐Ÿ”Ÿ back ur a LOADED ๐Ÿ’‹๐Ÿ‘…๐Ÿ™Œ๐Ÿป๐Ÿ˜‰๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ EASTER BASKET. If you get 2๏ธโƒฃ0๏ธโƒฃ back? UR GETTIN FUCKED ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆIN UR RABBIT ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿ‡๐ŸฐHOLE TONIGHT!!!!
April 2022

Holiday Emoji

Easter

Holiday

Daveโ€™s Hot โ€˜N Juicy 1/4lb Single

twitchquotes: My god, I would kill someone for a Daveโ€™s Hot โ€˜N Juicy 1/4lb Single right about now. I mean that bakery bun, coupled with that sexy melted American cheese, the kick of those red onions, and the salty, seasoned square of beef that is always fresh and never frozen cannot be topped anywhere. Every time I bite into a Wendyโ€™s burger, itโ€™s like itโ€™s making love to my tastebuds. I donโ€™t even like eating fast food; unless itโ€™s Wendyโ€™s.
twitch chat
April 2019
NairoMK

All of twitch seems to follow you almost like a cult

twitch chat
November 2014
Trick2g

Yearly dongers supply

twitchquotes: ใƒฝ เผผเบˆู„อœเบˆเผฝ๏พ‰ Did you know: Most dongersโ€”78 percent of the yearly dongers supplyโ€”is made into fedoras. Other industries, mostly electronics, medical, and dental, require about 12 percent. The remaining 10 percent of the yearly dongers supply is used in financial transactions. ใƒฝเผผเบˆู„อœเบˆเผฝ๏พ‰
twitch chat
December 2014
imaqtpie

Impossible to be happy and sad at the same time

twitchquotes: haHAA they say it's impossible to be happy & sad at the same time haHAA My wife told me i have the biggest d*ck out of all my brothers haHAA
twitch chat
October 2016
Text-to-Speech Playing