[Copypasta] Masturbation Notice from school

MASTURBATION NOTICE It has come to our attention that students have been masturbating in the school bathrooms. Masturbating on school property is ILLEGAL and against school district policy The bathroom pipes are NOT designed to handle human discharge or anything other than your regular bathroom duties The excessive amounts of discharge build-up has caused a blockage in the pipes. Multiple pipes have become close to bursting due to the amount of excessive semen build-up. This will cost THOUSANDS of dollars coming from our funds to repair the damage caused by this Please masturbate in your own homes and at your own disposal If any discharge is discovered in the bathroom, it will be collected and analyzed to determine who it belongs to. If it is discovered that the discharge is yours, YOU will be fine $ 1,000 and be reported to proper authorities Thank you for your cooperation
March 2022
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Do British people even exist?

Do british people actually exist? I mean, they must be a meme, there is a not a single thing about them. And I mean it. Let's go through the evidence: Where are they from? Not a single country in the world is named Britain. Some people say they come from England, and England is inside Britain, but if that was the case they would be British they would be Englanders. Also, heard some silly theories about them coming from whales. Guys, no, whale people do not exist. Whales live in the sea. There is a consensus on British people coming from Europe, but then we are left with a whole continent of possible locations. That's as good as nothing. What do they eat? Every country has at least one main dish. Even the US has their burgers. But these British people, what do they eat? Heard some people associating them with tea, but everyone knows that's an Asian thing. Shouldn't they come from Europe? One of these two points must be wrong them. To me, it looks too sketchy. What language do they speak? I challenge you, putting all my money and my ass on the line here, to find a supposed ""British"" person speaking their native language. Most of then just speak a broken ENGLISH. Yes, english. Really suspicious, huh? And I even tried to look deeper into it. Maybe british just SOUND like english, just like spanish could sound like portuguese for a non-speaker. So I looked up "british dictionary on google" and what I found was shocking: every word in there was AMERICAN. I kid you not. What this could mean is beyond my capabilities, but I can safely assure you that british people do not exist .
December 2020

British People

Classic

420

twitchquotes: (̅_̅_̅_̅м̲̅a̲̅я̲̅l̲̅b̲̅o̲̅r̲̅o̲̅̅_̅_̅̅(ด้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้้้้็็็็็้้้้้็็็็็"
twitch chat
August 2014
EtrnlWait

100% chance to have less FREEDOM AND LIBERTY

twitchquotes: (ʘ͡ ʖ͜ ʘ͡ ง) I AM EUROFAG. I have a 100% chance to have less FREEDOM AND LIBERTY than a citizen of the UNITED STATES OF AMERICA (ʘ͡ ʖ͜ ʘ͡ ง)
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

EU vs NA

A navy seal trained in gorilla warfare

twitchquotes: Please do not copy and paste this copypasta. It is my original copypasta and is protected by copyright law. If I see anyone pasting my intellectual property without permission, a navy seal trained in gorilla warfare will smite you.
twitch chat
September 2015

hi im greek

twitchquotes: hi im greek... as you probably guessed in m name.. plz have respect for this comment and read on.. if ou don't like it plz dont hate. My economy is not going well and effing Germans are trying to take over so I need help. Bjerg promised for every subscriber 0.0000199 % money would go towards me. Thank you for my message and plz subscribe bjerg... he is the best and better ( not german even better!)
twitch chat
July 2014
Bjergsen
Text-to-Speech Playing