[Copypasta] Masturbation Notice from school

MASTURBATION NOTICE It has come to our attention that students have been masturbating in the school bathrooms. Masturbating on school property is ILLEGAL and against school district policy The bathroom pipes are NOT designed to handle human discharge or anything other than your regular bathroom duties The excessive amounts of discharge build-up has caused a blockage in the pipes. Multiple pipes have become close to bursting due to the amount of excessive semen build-up. This will cost THOUSANDS of dollars coming from our funds to repair the damage caused by this Please masturbate in your own homes and at your own disposal If any discharge is discovered in the bathroom, it will be collected and analyzed to determine who it belongs to. If it is discovered that the discharge is yours, YOU will be fine $ 1,000 and be reported to proper authorities Thank you for your cooperation
March 2022
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

This is Catarrian's mother

twitchquotes: Hello Octavian, this is the Catarrian's mother. I am writing to in human words because the Catarrian feels he has been mistreated. He tells me "meow" which means that he feels you are not giving him enough stream time. And he also said "Nyaa," which means you better pet the Catarrian
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Riding the chat elevator

twitchquotes: ( ͡↑ ͜ʖ ͡↑) Riding the chat elevator all the way to Kripp ( ͡↑ ͜ʖ ͡↑)
twitch chat
July 2015
Kripp

bro i’m more japan than you

twitchquotes: bro are you disrespecting my japanese culture bro i’m more japan than all of you because i watch anime and you don’t, i bet you don’t even know what Naruto is you degenerate. So before you message me acting like you know my culture maybe check yourself first
twitch chat
June 2019

Weebs

Don't install Talking Roby

When I was 8 years old, I was searching for apps that were like Talking Tom. I found one that was called “Talking Roby The Robot”, I was curious so I downloaded it and installed it. I played it and I enjoyed every single second of it. I was a big fan of Roby. But when, it was 3 AM, my mom was sleeping so I now could use the phone without mom knowing, Tried the text to speech feature and typed the words “sing like dick”. The robot said “sing like dick”. I almost laughed too hard after seeing that. I recorded it and uploaded it to YouTube. after uploading it, I heard The Exorcist theme playing in the living room radio. I was shocked, I couldn’t move, and then Roby himself came out of my closet and said “sing like dick”. I was crying in fear, “is this a nightmare?” I asked. Roby said “no”. I was scared, this was real all along? And then Roby bled at me with hyper-realistic eyes and said: “666”. I was crying, and then he disappeared. My life has changed after that moment. Don’t install Talking Roby.
February 2021

xqcP

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢟⡭⡩⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢋⡞⣫⠎⢠⠊⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⠛⣛⣛⠋⠒⠽⠏⠄⠐⠛⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠁⠄⣀⣤⣾⣿⣷⣧⣧⣇⣨⣮⣦⣉⣦⢻⣦⡈⠙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠟⠄⠄⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠈⠹⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡏⠄⠄⢠⡿⢿⠿⠋⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠏⠉⠉⠉⠛⠃⡀⠸⣿⣿ ⣿⠄⠄⢀⣿⣿⣶⠶⠾⠿⠶⠿⠷⠚⠙⠛⢿⣿⣿⡿⠃⢀⣒⠉⢙⠻⠿⠄⢹⣿ ⡇⠄⠄⢸⡿⠟⠱⠾⠃⢼⡀⢐⣼⠇⠄⢀⡜⣿⣿⡀⠄⢹⣅⠉⠼⢃⡀⠄⠈⣿ ⡇⠄⠄⢸⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⠶⠂⣀⣴⣿⣷⢹⣿⣷⣦⣤⣶⣾⣿⠏⠁⠄⠄⣿ ⣇⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣴⣿⠟⣉⣹⣇⣿⣿⡟⢻⣿⣿⣿⡀⠄⠄⠄⣿ ⣿⠄⠄⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡘⠛⢛⠼⢿⡿⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⠄⢰⣿ ⣿⣇⠄⠄⢸⣿⣷⣤⣀⠄⠄⠄⢀⣉⡉⠙⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠋⠉⠛⢛⡛⠛⢀⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣦⡀⠄⢿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣮⣭⣛⡛⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠟⣛⣋⣭⣥⠖⠂⣠⣾⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⡘⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠉⢁⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⣤⣍⣉⣙⣛⣛⣛⣛⣛⣋⣉⣤⣤⣴⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
November 2020
xQcOW
Text-to-Speech Playing