[Copypasta] Oh I'm sorry snowflake, did I OFFEND you?

Oh I'm sorry snowflake, did I OFFEND you? Do you want a bandaid? Do you want a hug? Do you want a kiss? I will kiss you. I will do it. Right on the mouth. Come here snowflake.. that's it.. your lips are so soft, snowflake.. mnnhm... ah...... snowflake..........
January 2022

Politics

I used to be a real ad
More Politics Copypastas

Biden's America

The year is 2021. You look at the television. SIlver fox President Biden announces a vaccine mandate for employees. You clutch your limited edition Trump Funko Pop. It has begun. You gather up all your belongings, and jump into your truck, hitting the highway for the airport. Out of your rearview mirror you can make out a sleek black Prius pursuing you. You make out the numbers “1” “9” “8” and 4” on their license plate. You are able to lose the Prius and arrive at the airport. You are almost free. At airport security You see a young man being dragged away screaming. The guards yell something about him having more than 3.4 oz of liquid. Thankfully you only have an AR 15 on you. The guard inspects it. “It’s for hunting,” you say. They hand it back to you and wave for you to move along. You breathe a sigh of relief. “One more thing.” You turn to see a Guard staring down at you with their beady soulless eyes. “I need to see your vaccination card” It is too late. You try to run away, but you feel someone press a cloth against your face. Reality fades away. You wake up in some kind of lab, chained down to an operation table and gagged. The room is undecorated except for a single poster of Harry Styles in a dress on the wall. A single figure stands in the corner shrouded in shadow, fiddling with a syringe. As they step out of the shadow, you can make out their face, the roguishly handsome Gavin Newsom. He positions a large surgical headlight above you and turns it on. He holds up the large syringe to the light and chuckles, staring into your pleading eyes. “Don't worry, it will all be over soon” He removes his mask to reveal his serpent's tongue, flickering in amusement. He plunges the syringe straight through your “socialism is for figs” shirt into your arm. “Nighty night” Your world fades to black once more.
October 2021

Joe Biden

Politics

Time to get ready for big daddy HOE Biden

The results 📈are in and our gurl 💃🏻 sanders is out 🏳️‍🌈. Time to get ready for big daddy HOE Biden. He's cumming 💦💦 to DOMINATE🤼‍♂️ our HEAD of state 🍊 and his bitch💁🏻‍♀️ mike pence. He may be a donkey but he's big as a horse 🍆🐴 and is ready to touch 👋🤫😈 the hearts 💞of all Americans 🇺🇸. Cum erection day 🗳 y'all sluts better fill that hole 👉🏻👌 next to biden and relase✊ America's aching 🤤throbbing 😮 desire for green 🤑🤑energy, a ban 🛑on those naughty big black guns💪🏾, and more money to pay💵💰💸 those slutty nurses 👩‍⚕️💁‍♀️ to make us all feel better 👄🥴. Cum 💦 hoevember help the needy 👅🧎🏻‍♂️ by supporting big daddy Biden 👨🏻‍🦳and naughty Nancy💁‍♀️👏 and give dirty Donald 🎩, bitch McConnell 🐢, and those filthy 😷😏 reSUBlicans🐘 blue balls🔵. Send to 🔟 of your most deviant 😈democrats. If you get 5️⃣back ur a Biden bitch 💅🏻💵. if u get 🔟 u will spend a hot 🔥 December⛄️night with those skanks at the ERECToral 😏🍆 college 🏛.)
May 2022

Emoji Pasta

Politics

Joe Biden

Roe v. Wade Emoji Pasta

HEY 👋😩 there comrade 💦💪cummy! the 👹 supreme 🍆 cock🏛 has 🗳voted to strike 👩‍⚖️⌛️down the 🌈 sexy 🤧🤰🏻roe v. wade decision 😏according 🤤🦶🏻to a opinion 🖊written✍️💸 by daddy 💅🏻🙈 sammy 👶🏻🙅🏻‍♂️ aLITo. 🐷💨 the opinion is a 💦🍌 FULL THROATED 📲❤️‍🔥GIRTHY 🍆 contraDICKtion 🚫🍑 of the 1973 👿👎decision that 💁🏻‍♀️👌 guaranteed federal 😤 cocks-titutuinal 😳 protection 👅💄of abortion rights!!! ❤️‍🔥🫡everyone who 🏳️‍🌈💦 woke remember 🙋✊🏻🤔 to fund 💸🥵 planned parenthood and 🌪👼 donate to 🧑🏼‍🍼🤑abortion funds! get yo 📸uturuses 💋👠turnt you 💃whore! 🌭every whore knows 🧠🍼that everyone 🔜should have 👩‍⚕️🏥access to safe 🙏 🌎abortions ❤️😘 if they choose 💅🏻👀 to have one. 👑👹send to ten 😬🙏of your closest 🚱🅾️WHORES to secure abortion 📫🤝rights in ameriCUM 🤤🇺🇸if you get five ✋ back abortion 😘💋rights will be codified 👩‍⚖️🤤in law 📸👠
May 2022

Emoji Pasta

Politics

Oh I'm sorry snowflake, did I OFFEND you?

Oh I'm sorry snowflake, did I OFFEND you? Do you want a bandaid? Do you want a hug? Do you want a kiss? I will kiss you. I will do it. Right on the mouth. Come here snowflake.. that's it.. your lips are so soft, snowflake.. mnnhm... ah...... snowflake..........
January 2022

Politics

Biden transplants his brain into the United States' neural network database

thats very true. if you vote trump, there is no nuance in that little flipping nugget of a brain of yours. you are a simpleton, comparable to the gum stuck on the heel of my shoe- dirtying an institution which needs to be scraped clean. thankfully, your time has come. the antics end with joe biden, who has squandered the far-right and united a nation, and once he transplants his beautiful old slimy man brain into the United States' neural network database (which is encrypted and connected to the internet, along with google's whole database, so yes, he WILL know what you're doing) we can finally live in a safe country.
July 2022

Politics

Joe Biden

Donald Trump

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