[Copypasta] How to kill a geologist

Disclaimer: my hatred of geologists is purely theatrical, but if I did have to kill one for some reason, it would be very easy. I’d brandish my obsidian knife at them and they’d be compelled to approach. “That’s very cool,” they’d say, confident in their superior strength and endurance from all the rocks they carry around at all times. They’d shower me with very interesting facts about obsidian and hover just out of range of the cutting edge, waiting for me to exhaust myself. “But as it is volcanic glass, it’s very fragile, you see, and isn’t well-suited for use as a weap—” and then I’d hit them with the wooden baseball bat in my other hand, which they would not have noticed because geologists can only see rocks and minerals.
January 2022
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Copy pasta makes you look Italian and vegan

twitchquotes: Remember boys and girls, its not good to copy pasta. It makes you look Italian and vegan and can be detrimental to your health and peers if you display unwanted or annoying text, repetitive chat, and rude/disrespectful words.
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Subbin to Bjergsen when his emote is free

twitchquotes: subbing haHAA to bjergsen haHAA when haHAA his haHAA emote haHAA is haHAA free haHAA
twitch chat
January 2017
Bjergsen

Fancy Schmancy F

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢀⡤⢶⣶⣶⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢀⣠⣤⣤⣤⣿⣧⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣤⡄⠀ ⢠⣾⡟⠋⠁⠀⠀⣸⠇⠈⣿⣿⡟⠉⠉⠉⠙⠻⣿⡀ ⢺⣿⡀⠀⠀⢀⡴⠋⠀⠀⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠇ ⠈⠛⠿⠶⠚⠋⣀⣤⣤⣤⣿⣿⣇⣀⣀⣴⡆⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⡞⠋⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⡏⠉⠛⠻⣿⡀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠈⠁⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣠⣶⣶⣶⣶⡄⠀⠀⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⢰⣿⠟⠉⠙⢿⡟⠀⠀⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⢸⡟⠀⠀⠀⠘⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠈⢿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠙⠷⠶⠶⠶⠿⠟⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
July 2019

its 3 am and i fucked up really bad

I was hungry so i decided to eat some bbq wings and watch some anime. there was about 6 of it and i ate 3 and a half. that was when i started to feel a bit funky on my hand and mouth, and i thought to myself "wow, these bacteria are extra rough today". i used the flashlight on my phone to see what was going on and there was an army of ants covering my hands and i shit you not, i cough once and my mouth is a shotgun that shoots ants as bullets. i was covered in fear and ants and the urge to scream, but the fear of asian parents is stronger. i can only cry silently in a dark and quiet room, all alone, while being violated by ants.
April 2021

Yoda and his RNG wisdom

twitchquotes: <(-_-)> greed leads to the bad rng, the bad rng leads to the frustration, frustration leads to the mistake, and the mistake leads to the dark side <(-_-)>
twitch chat
March 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

Text-to-Speech Playing