Disclaimer: my hatred of geologists is purely theatrical, but if I did have to kill one for some reason, it would be very easy.
I’d brandish my obsidian knife at them and they’d be compelled to approach. “That’s very cool,” they’d say, confident in their superior strength and endurance from all the rocks they carry around at all times. They’d shower me with very interesting facts about obsidian and hover just out of range of the cutting edge, waiting for me to exhaust myself. “But as it is volcanic glass, it’s very fragile, you see, and isn’t well-suited for use as a weap—” and then I’d hit them with the wooden baseball bat in my other hand, which they would not have noticed because geologists can only see rocks and minerals.
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Plane
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Bad at video games. Get good.
twitchquotes:
Hello Streamer. I would like to tell you a story. I am a 44 year old women from Colombia. My babby is 14 yaer old and has ligma so he cannot play vidya games. Everi day he must roll his wheelchair to school where he is bullied because of his condition. When he comes home he has no friends to play with, so the only thing he can do is to watch your stream. Because at least then he will feel good about his life since you are so fucking bad at video games. Fucking loser. Get good.
twitch chat
I charted your LP for the last month
twitchquotes:
📉 q-qt, I charted your LP for the last month...
📉 q-qt, I charted your LP for the last month...
twitch chat
imaqtpie
Classic
League of Legends
You aren’t like the other girls. You're built different
I have seen numerous people use this filter and I can confidently say that your rendition of the use of this filter is by far the best I’ve ever seen. You’re absolutely hilarious, very quirky, whacky, and unique. And you know you are all of those things. I just love how raw, unscripted, and genuine your reactions are whilst using this filter. No other person has ever posted something like this. It’s so refreshing to see someone as different yet original as you. As cliché as it may sound, you aren’t like the other girls. You were built different. And I applause you for that.
Simps
Hungrybox at a grocery store
I saw Hungrybox at a grocery store in Los Angeles yesterday. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything. He said, “Oh, like you’re doing now?” I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “huh? huh? huh?” and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen green bandannas in his hands without paying. The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like “Sir, you need to pay for those first.” At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter. When she took one of the bandannas and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually “to prevent any electrical infetterence,” and then turned around and rested me. I don’t even think that’s a word. After she scanned each bandanna and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by popping off really loudly.
Hungrybox