[Copypasta] How to kill a geologist

Disclaimer: my hatred of geologists is purely theatrical, but if I did have to kill one for some reason, it would be very easy. I’d brandish my obsidian knife at them and they’d be compelled to approach. “That’s very cool,” they’d say, confident in their superior strength and endurance from all the rocks they carry around at all times. They’d shower me with very interesting facts about obsidian and hover just out of range of the cutting edge, waiting for me to exhaust myself. “But as it is volcanic glass, it’s very fragile, you see, and isn’t well-suited for use as a weap—” and then I’d hit them with the wooden baseball bat in my other hand, which they would not have noticed because geologists can only see rocks and minerals.
January 2022
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Fulfill my dreams of being an industrial vacuum

twitchquotes: Hello Reynad, big fan here trying to fulfill my dreams of being an industrial vacuum for constipated hospital patients, any tips on sucking ass?
twitch chat
January 2015
Reynad

forsenLUL

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⢉⣿⣿⠿⠋⠄⢴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⣠⣶⣿⠟⠁⣠⣶⣶⣤⣄⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⣴⡿⠛⠁⢠⣾⣯⣉⡉⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣍⡉⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⡟⠁⠄⣾⠋⠄⠄⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠿⣷⣤⣽⣿⣿⣿⠄ ⠟⠄⠄⣠⣴⠋⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣹⣟⡉⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀ ⠄⠄⣴⡟⠁⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣤⣤⣌⡙⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⢰⣿⠁⣰⣿⣿⣿⡟⢁⣤⣤⣭⡙⠳⢦⣄⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟ ⠄⣾⡇⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢻⡏⠉⠻⠿⣷⣆⠹⡆⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠁⠄⠄ ⠄⡿⠄⣡⣬⠉⣻⣿⣷⣄⣀⠄⠄⠄⠈⠛⠂⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠃⠄⠄⢠⣾ ⠄⣡⣾⡿⢇⣼⣿⠿⠿⠟⢉⣉⣠⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⠄⣴⣿⠏ ⣾⣿⣟⣁⣈⣩⣴⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⠿⠟⠛⠛⠋⠡⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⠄⢀⣾⡟⠁⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠛⣛⣉⣁⣀⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣀⣀⠘⠻⣿⣿⠟⠄⠄⣾⠟⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⢸⡿⠄⠄⣼⡏⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⣉⣁⣤⣤⣴⣶⣶⣶⣦⣤⣌⣙⠛⢀⣈⠃⠄⠰⣿⠁⠄⠄⠄⢠ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠟⠛⣋⣉⣩⣭⠉⢋⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣦⣤⣤⣴⣿
November 2021
Forsen

Emote

Tanner from Highschool

twitchquotes: So you're going by "loltyler1" now nerd? Haha whats up douche bag, it's Tanner from Highschool. Remember me? Me and the guys used to give you a hard time in school. Sorry you were just an easy target lol. I can see not much has changed. Remember Sarah the girl you had a crush on? Yeah we're married now. I make over 200k a year and drive a mustang GT. I guess some things never change huh loser? Nice catching up lol. Pathetic..
twitch chat
March 2018
Tyler1

Classic

Tanner from High School

I thought, I thought you streamed for me

twitchquotes: ʜᴇʏ ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ, ᴛʜɪs ɪs ᴛʜᴇ ʟᴀsᴛ ʏᴏᴜ'ʟʟ ʙᴇ ʀᴇᴀᴅɪɴɢ ғʀᴏᴍ ᴍᴇ. ᴛʜᴇsᴇ ɴᴇᴡ ᴇᴍᴏᴛᴇs ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴄᴏɴᴠɪɴᴄᴇᴅ ᴍᴇ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ'ʀᴇ ᴊᴜsᴛ ᴀɴᴏᴛʜᴇʀ sᴇʟʟ─ᴏᴜᴛ. ɪ ᴛʜᴏᴜɢʜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴇʀᴇ ᴅɪғғᴇʀᴇɴᴛ ᴛʜᴀɴ ᴛʜᴇ ʀᴇsᴛ. ɪ ᴛʜᴏᴜɢʜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ sᴛʀᴇᴀᴍᴇᴅ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴠɪᴇᴡᴇʀs... ɪ ᴛʜᴏᴜɢʜᴛ, ɪ ᴛʜᴏᴜɢʜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ sᴛʀᴇᴀᴍᴇᴅ ғᴏʀ ᴍᴇ. ʙᴜᴛ ᴛʜᴀᴛ's ᴏᴠᴇʀ, ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ. ɢᴏᴏᴅʙʏᴇ
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

If Morbius has a trillion fans

If Morbius has a trillion fans I am one of them. If Morbius has 10 fans I am one of them. If Morbius has no fans, that I means I am no longer on Earth. If the Universe is against Morbius, I am against the Universe. I love Morbius until my last breath.
June 2022

Morbius

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