[Copypasta] How to kill a geologist

Disclaimer: my hatred of geologists is purely theatrical, but if I did have to kill one for some reason, it would be very easy. I’d brandish my obsidian knife at them and they’d be compelled to approach. “That’s very cool,” they’d say, confident in their superior strength and endurance from all the rocks they carry around at all times. They’d shower me with very interesting facts about obsidian and hover just out of range of the cutting edge, waiting for me to exhaust myself. “But as it is volcanic glass, it’s very fragile, you see, and isn’t well-suited for use as a weap—” and then I’d hit them with the wooden baseball bat in my other hand, which they would not have noticed because geologists can only see rocks and minerals.
January 2022
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gachiGASM

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April 2016

KappaPride

Classic

This Disney DVD is enhanced with Disney's FastPlay

twitchquotes: 𝙏𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝘿𝙞𝙨𝙣𝙚𝙮 𝘿𝙑𝘿 𝙞𝙨 𝙚𝙣𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙘𝙚𝙙 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝘿𝙞𝙨𝙣𝙚𝙮’𝙨 𝙁𝙖𝙨𝙩𝙋𝙡𝙖𝙮. 𝙔𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙢𝙤𝙫𝙞𝙚 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙖 𝙨𝙚𝙡𝙚𝙘𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣 𝙤𝙛 𝙗𝙤𝙣𝙪𝙨 𝙛𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙪𝙧𝙚𝙨 𝙬𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙗𝙚𝙜𝙞𝙣 𝙖𝙪𝙩𝙤𝙢𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙘𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙮. 𝙏𝙤 𝙗𝙮𝙥𝙖𝙨𝙨 𝙁𝙖𝙨𝙩 𝙋𝙡𝙖𝙮, 𝙨𝙚𝙡𝙚𝙘𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙈𝙖𝙞𝙣 𝙈𝙚𝙣𝙪 𝙗𝙪𝙩𝙩𝙤𝙣 𝙖𝙩 𝙖𝙣𝙮 𝙩𝙞𝙢𝙚. 𝙁𝙖𝙨𝙩 𝙋𝙡𝙖𝙮 𝙬𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙗𝙚𝙜𝙞𝙣 𝙞𝙣 𝙖 𝙢𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙣𝙩…
twitch chat
May 2019

League of Lesbians

twitchquotes: Once upon a time, I opened a LoL game. I entered the game, and I was promptly greeted by another player. I noticed it was a female player and I was pleasantly surprised. I told her of my great love for the female anatomy, particularly the breasts and the backside. To my surprise, she told me she also enjoyed these things. It was then that I realised, I was playing League of Lesbians.....
twitch chat
August 2014
imaqtpie

League of Legends

PepegaPirate

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠔⠊⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠐⢦⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡐⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⣆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⠖⠁⢀⣾⣆⡰⠶⡷⠶⣀⣾⣄⠄⠈⣆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⡄⠄⠠⢤⣤⠔⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⢧⣤⢣⣤⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠣⢤⡠⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠘⠦⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢻⡟⠻⣿⣿⡿⠻⡟⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡀⠞ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⢢⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡠⠊⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠢⣤⣤⣴⣶⡶⢶⣶⣶⣶⣆⢒⣤⣤⠄⢠⠤⠤⠚⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣎⢻⣿⠁⡀⣿⡎⣿⣿⣀⣃⠧⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⣠⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡹⡼⢿⣠⠵⠿⣑⢿⣟⣛⠤⣩⡁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⢠⣿⣿⣿⢏⡜⡻⣷⡽⣿⣷⣭⣿⣮⣽⣯⣽⣿⣿⣷⣤⣾⡿⠟⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠻⣿⣿⣿⣌⢷⣙⠾⠯⣒⡿⠭⣝⣛⣛⣛⣛⠛⠭⠭⠟⢣⠌⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠻⣿⣿⣿⣮⣟⠷⣦⣤⣝⣛⠲⠶⠶⠒⢂⣀⠠⠄⠐⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠙⠿⠿⢿⣿⡷⠶⠭⠭⠭⠵⠶⠒⠋⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
June 2021

Pepe

Your stream has provided a constant influx of salt

twitchquotes: Mr. Kripp, I would like to personally thank you for saving my life. I lead a stressful life and have dangerously high blood sugar. Your stream has provided a constant influx of salt which has balanced my blood sugar levels, and according to the doctor I'm gonna do just fine now. Please remember that every time you get flamestriked, your saltiness cures another middle-aged man like myself of diabetes.
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp
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