[Copypasta] How to kill a geologist

Disclaimer: my hatred of geologists is purely theatrical, but if I did have to kill one for some reason, it would be very easy. I’d brandish my obsidian knife at them and they’d be compelled to approach. “That’s very cool,” they’d say, confident in their superior strength and endurance from all the rocks they carry around at all times. They’d shower me with very interesting facts about obsidian and hover just out of range of the cutting edge, waiting for me to exhaust myself. “But as it is volcanic glass, it’s very fragile, you see, and isn’t well-suited for use as a weap—” and then I’d hit them with the wooden baseball bat in my other hand, which they would not have noticed because geologists can only see rocks and minerals.
January 2022
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Kripp's new sub emotes have convinced me he is a sellout

twitchquotes: ʜᴇʏ ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ, ᴛʜɪs ɪs ᴛʜᴇ ʟᴀsᴛ ʏᴏᴜ'ʟʟ ʙᴇ ʀᴇᴀᴅɪɴɢ ғʀᴏᴍ ᴍᴇ. ᴛʜᴇsᴇ ɴᴇᴡ ᴇᴍᴏᴛᴇs ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴄᴏɴᴠɪɴᴄᴇᴅ ᴍᴇ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ'ʀᴇ ᴊᴜsᴛ ᴀɴᴏᴛʜᴇʀ sᴇʟʟ─ᴏᴜᴛ. ɪ ᴛʜᴏᴜɢʜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴇʀᴇ ᴅɪғғᴇʀᴇɴᴛ ᴛʜᴀɴ ᴛʜᴇ ʀᴇsᴛ. ɪ ᴛʜᴏᴜɢʜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ sᴛʀᴇᴀᴍᴇᴅ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴠɪᴇᴡᴇʀs... ɪ ᴛʜᴏᴜɢʜᴛ, ɪ ᴛʜᴏᴜɢʜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ sᴛʀᴇᴀᴍᴇᴅ ғᴏʀ ᴍᴇ. ʙᴜᴛ ᴛʜᴀᴛ's ᴏᴠᴇʀ, ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ. ɢᴏᴏᴅʙʏᴇ
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Trollge face v2

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⠞⠉⢉⠩⢍⡙⠛⠋⣉⠉⠍⢉⣉⣉⣉⠩⢉⠉⠛⠲⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⡴⠁⠀⠂⡠⠑⠀⠀⠀⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⠀⠀⠐⠁⢊⠀⠄⠈⢦⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⣠⡾⠁⠀⠀⠄⣴⡪⠽⣿⡓⢦⠀⠀⡀⠀⣠⢖⣻⣿⣒⣦⠀⡀⢀⣈⢦⡀⠀ ⣰⠑⢰⠋⢩⡙⠒⠦⠖⠋⠀⠈⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠀⠘⠦⠤⠴⠒⡟⠲⡌⠛⣆ ⢹⡰⡸⠈⢻⣈⠓⡦⢤⣀⡀⢾⠩⠤⠀⠀⠤⠌⡳⠐⣒⣠⣤⠖⢋⡟⠒⡏⡄⡟ ⠀⠙⢆⠀⠀⠻⡙⡿⢦⣄⣹⠙⠒⢲⠦⠴⡖⠒⠚⣏⣁⣤⣾⢚⡝⠁⠀⣨⠞⠀ ⠀⠀⠈⢧⠀⠀⠙⢧⡀⠈⡟⠛⠷⡾⣶⣾⣷⠾⠛⢻⠉⢀⡽⠋⠀⠀⣰⠃⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⢤⡠⢂⠌⡛⠦⠤⣄⣇⣀⣀⣸⣀⡤⠼⠚⡉⢄⠠⣠⠞⠁⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠓⠮⣔⡁⠦⠀⣤⠤⠤⣤⠄⠰⠌⣂⡬⠖⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠒⠤⢤⣀⣀⡤⠴⠒⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
July 2021

ZULUL if you understand this communique

twitchquotes: ZULUL if you understand this communique, you have been defeated ZULUL and you must post identical communique in chatroom ZULUL never ending cycle ZULUL
twitch chat
March 2019
Forsen

So you're going by "c9Sneaky" now nerd?

twitchquotes: So you're going by "c9Sneaky" now nerd? Haha whats up douche bag, it's Tanner from Highschool. Remember me? Me and the guys used to give you a hard time in school. Sorry you were just an easy target lol. I can see not much has changed. Remember Antwan250 the boy you had a crush on? Yeah we're married now. I make over 200k a year and drive a mustang GT. I guess some things never change huh loser? Nice catching up lol. Pathetic
twitch chat
April 2018
Sneaky

Tanner from High School

SPAM THIS CRUSTACEAN FOR HBOX ELIMINATION

twitchquotes: SPAM 🦀 THIS 🦀 CRUSTACEAN 🦀 FOR 🦀 HBOX 🦀 ELIMINATION 🦀
twitch chat
June 2019

Rhyme Chant

Super Smash Bros

Text-to-Speech Playing