[Copypasta] I'm sorry for the comments I made. Please unban me

twitchquotes: I'm sorry for the comments I made. They were far beyond the point of being considered appropriate. You are an incredible person & me having been under the influence of alcohol is no excuse for allowing my behaviour to continue for as long as it did. I swear by God's gracious gift of free will that if you ever allow me to be an active member of your community again I will never follow the precedent I'd set for myself leading up to your rational decision to ban me. i think you're really cool.
twitch chat
January 2022
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

That's a KEKW bro

twitchquotes: ใ„’ๅ„ๅ‚ใ„’ไธ‚ ๅ‚ าœไน‡าœๅฑฑ ไนƒๅฐบใ„–
twitch chat
February 2021

My wife told me to talk dirty to her

So the wife and I were getting into it and she told me to talk dirty to her. So I called her a filthy slut. She said โ€œdirtier!โ€ So I smacked her around and told her I was going to use her like the cheap whore she is. She said โ€œdirtier!โ€ So I said โ€œIโ€™m gonna stick some SQQQ in your portfolio. Iโ€™m gonna put it in long and deep. Iโ€™m gonna fill you up with way OTM SPY puts.โ€ She then slapped me, packed a bag and took the kids. I think weโ€™re getting a divorce.
April 2021

WallStreetBets

Navy Seal

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, kiddo.
April 2019

Classic

Navy Seal

Logan Paul Apology but I replace "apologize" with "cum"

I've made a severe and continuous lapse in my judgement and I don't expect to be forgiven. I'm simply here to cum. So what we came across that day on the woods was obviously unplanned and the reactions you saw on tape were raw, they were unfiltered. None of us knew how to react or how to feel. I should have never posted the video. I should have put the cameras down, and stopped recording what we were going through. There's a lot of things I should have done differently, but I didn't, and for that from the bottom of my heart, I am sorry. I want to cum to the internet, I want to cum to anyone who's seen the video, I want to cum to anyone who has been affected or touched by mental illness, or depression, or suicide. But, most importantly, I want to cum to the victim and his family. For, my fans, who are defending my actions, please don't, they do not deserve to be defended. The goal of my content is always to entertain, to push the boundaries, to be all inclusive and in the world I live in I share almost everything I do. The intent is never to be heartless, cruel, or malicious. Like I said, I made a huge mistake, I don't expect to be forgiven, I'm just here to cum. I'm ashamed of myself. I'm disappointed in myself, and I promise to be better. I will be better, thank you.
May 2022

OH MY GOD IS THAT A RAINBOW LOGO?

โ€ผ๏ธโ€ผ๏ธOH MY GODโ€ผ๏ธโ€ผ๏ธ IS THAT A ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆR๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆA๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆI๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆN๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆB๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆO๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆW๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ LOGO?!?!?!?!? ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ OMG ๐Ÿคฏ๐ŸคฏUR SO INCLUSIVE๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆLGBT ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธTRANS ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธRIGHTS YAAAAS!!!!!!!!!๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ UR SO PROGRESSIVE ๐Ÿ’๐Ÿปโ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿ’๐Ÿผโ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿ’๐Ÿฝโ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿ’๐Ÿพโ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿ’๐Ÿฟโ€โ™‚๏ธ I WILL NOW BUY EVERYTHING YOU HAVE! ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿฅบ๐Ÿฅบ๐Ÿฅบ I LOVE YOU SO MUCH NOW ๐Ÿ˜ซ๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿฅฐ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ
June 2021

Emoji Pasta

Text-to-Speech Playing