[Copypasta] I'm sorry for the comments I made. Please unban me

twitchquotes: I'm sorry for the comments I made. They were far beyond the point of being considered appropriate. You are an incredible person & me having been under the influence of alcohol is no excuse for allowing my behaviour to continue for as long as it did. I swear by God's gracious gift of free will that if you ever allow me to be an active member of your community again I will never follow the precedent I'd set for myself leading up to your rational decision to ban me. i think you're really cool.
twitch chat
January 2022
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Kripp's gotta hit up the bathroom

twitchquotes: "Give me a second, guys," Kripp says. "Gotta hit up the bathroom" He turns down the volume on his microphone, and immediately gives Dex a swift kick down the stairs. As Dex yelps loudly in pain, Kripp overturns the nearest chair, yelling "Fuck this game!" as loudly as he can. Rania tries to calm him down, but Kripp swiftly bodyslams her onto a glass coffee table. After taking a few deep breaths, Kripp wipes the blood off of his face, sits back down at his computer, and resumes his stream.
twitch chat
January 2018
Kripp

Classic

I feel so bad for people who unironically like anime

twitchquotes: I feel so bad for people who unironically like anime. Like, they didn't choose to be born with an IQ of 20 in a home with unloving parents. Imagine all the bullying they must experience at home, at school, and at the special services daycare. Let's stop bullying them, guys. They may be too retarded to understand that's what we're doing, but that doesn't mean we should pick on them. Thank you
twitch chat
August 2019

Weebs

I sexually identify as an Ironbeak Owl

twitchquotes: I sexually identify as an Ironbeak Owl. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of being misplayed during tournaments and silencing the incorrect cards. People say to me that a person being an owl is ridiculous and I'm fucking retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a genetic engineer put ironbeak owl DNA into my body, equipping me with feathers, beaks, and the power to silence others. From now on I want you guys to call me "Owlsen" and respect my right to silence from above and silence needlessly. If you can't accept me you're an owlphobe and need to check your animal privilege. Thank you for understanding.
twitch chat
March 2015

Hearthstone

I sexually Identify as

Oh god I want xqc so bad

twitchquotes: Oh god I want xqc so bad ๐Ÿ˜ฉ ๐Ÿ’ฆ he's so smart ๐Ÿค“ ๐Ÿ“š and cute ๐Ÿ˜˜ ๐Ÿ™ˆ I would take him to my apartment and kiss him ๐Ÿ‘„ ๐Ÿ˜˜ lick him ๐Ÿ‘… ๐Ÿ˜› and finger him ๐Ÿ‘‰ ๐Ÿ‘Œ I would fuck him ๐Ÿ† ๐Ÿ’ฆ then I'd get him pregnant ๐Ÿคฐ ๐Ÿ‘ถ and we'd raise our own little baby ๐Ÿ‘จ๐Ÿ‘จ๐Ÿ‘ฆ ๐Ÿ‘ฆ and play fortnite with him ๐ŸŽฎ โŒจ๏ธ xd
twitch chat
April 2019
xQcOW

Emoji Pasta

โ€œRatioโ€ shut up. Shut the fuck up

โ€œRatioโ€ shut up. Shut the fuck up. Nobody cares! Youโ€™re gonna get the negative side of this ratio that you so care about. Shut the fuck up. I thought Reddit was bad enough but now itโ€™s borrowing from Twitter. Nobody gives a shit about the like ratio, nobody gives a shit about your retarded comment. Take my advice and shut the fuck up!
July 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing