[Copypasta] ⚠️ ATTENTION ALL MEN: Be EXTREMELY careful you ONLY buy shower products FOR MEN.

I went to the store one time because I was out of my Men's 5-in-1 shampoo, conditioner, body wash, hand soap, and shaving cream and wanted to take a shower. As I was in a hurry I didn't bother to check the label, I just grabbed it, paid, and ran. When I got home I turned on the shower, let the water run all over my body (but not on my ass, real men don't wash that) and began applying my new 5-in-1 lotion. Or so I thought. After I had done so I nearly fell to the ground as pain spread all throughout my body (normally as a real man I can handle pain yet this was somehow an exception). I looked down and my p***s was completely gone, however my view was quickly obstructed as my pecs began to swell. I reached up to feel my chin only to realize all the hair in my beard had fallen out. My plans afterwards began to fade as I began to lose my extremely masculine interests. In a panic, I reached to turn off the water and jumped out to look in the mirror, however it must be broken as there was a woman staring back at me. It was in this moment that I grabbed the bottle and read the label: For Women.
December 2021
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UwU what's this? Nuzzles how are you

twitchquotes: Rawr🐲🐊 x3😋 nuzzles how are you😉🙂 pounces on you😛 you’re😃 so😄 warm🤒😈 o3o😏 notices😯 you have a bulge🍆 o:😯😮 someone’s happy😃 ;)😉😜 nuzzles your necky wecky😈😗~ murr~ hehehe😊 rubbies👋🤚 your bulgy🍆 wolgy you’re😌 so big😯😮 :oooo rubbies👋🤚 more on your bulgy🍆 wolgy it🚫 doesn’t stop🛑 growing ·///· 😐kisses😚😘 you🙂 and lickies😝👅💦💦
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April 2019

Emoji Pasta

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Ben Shapiro counts to one million

So today, for the first time, my little toddler finally counted to ten. Everyone was celebrating, saying how proud they are in my kid, and then Ben Shapiro kicks open the door. "Oh you think it's impressive that they can count to ten? I can count to one million." and then proceeded, in my living room for the next two weeks, to count to one million. He then said "yep, another libtard destroyed" and then curbstomped my kid.
December 2020

Ben Shapiro

forsenSS

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠛⡿⢋⣠⣿⣿⡄⣰⢞⣿⡵⣽⢯⣶⢾⣿⣟⣿⣭⣤⡌⠙⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⣴⠄⢠⣿⣿⣟⡿⣟⣳⣿⡿⣗⡷⣫⣿⡏⣿⣻⣭⣿⣿⠁⠜⠻ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⢰⣿⡀⣾⣿⣿⢼⣧⣿⣿⣿⣿⢟⣶⣿⡏⣇⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⣀⣴⡆ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⢹⣿⣿⣿⠾⠟⣛⢷⡝⢟⣳⢿⣽⢿⡟⡝⢻⣿⡿⠿⣟⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡀⢨⣀⢿⢧⠟⣏⡛⠻⡿⣻⣿⣿⣿⢾⣷⢨⣪⣿⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟ ⣿⣿⣿⠷⠄⢻⣿⠾⢿⢫⣾⣬⢿⣸⣿⡟⡒⢹⣱⣿⣛⠯⣿⢿⢟⣵⣾⢟⠿⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⡀⢢⡌⣵⣿⡷⢿⣿⣿⣯⢣⣿⡯⣿⣷⣜⡲⣏⣿⣟⣷⢻⣿⢽⠿⣟⣻ ⣿⣿⣿⣷⢆⣼⣿⣿⣴⠂⠈⣿⣿⣯⣵⣾⡿⢿⢋⣉⣥⣿⣽⡿⣾⣿⣿⣿⢿⠋ ⣿⣿⡿⢣⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⠾⣒⣨⣿⣺⣿⣟⣾⣥⣀⠐ ⣿⣿⢃⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡁⠄⠉⢻⡣⢾⣾⣯⣟⣫⣽⡿⠟⠁⢉ ⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣽⣿⣿⣷⣷⣦⣼⡿⣰⡾⣤⣭⣍⠁⠤⣴⣾⣿ ⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠈⠘⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡗⠄⠓⠄⣉⣠⣤⣤⣀⣸⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⡄⠚⠳⠂⠄⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠁⠄⢐⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡆⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠄⣀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣷⣌⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
November 2021
Forsen

Emote

When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade (Portal)

When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I'm the man who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I'm gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!
May 2021

A girl... AND a gamer?

A girl.... AND a gamer? Whoa mama! Hummina hummina hummina bazooooooooing! *eyes pop out* AROOOOOOOOGA! *jaw drops tongue rolls out* WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF *tongue bursts out of the outh uncontrollably leaking face and everything in reach* WURBLWUBRLBWURblrwurblwurlbrwubrlwburlwbruwrlblwublr *tiny cupid shoots an arrow through heart* Ahhhhhhhhhhh me lady... *heart in the shape of a heart starts beating so hard you can see it through shirt* ba-bum ba-bum ba-bum ba-bum ba-bum *milk truck crashes into a bakery store in the background spiling white liquid and dough on the streets* BABY WANTS TO FUCK *inhales from the gas tank* honka honka honka honka *masturabtes furiously* ohhhh my gooooodd~
March 2021

Classic

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