Steps up to mic, straightens tie, clears throat, taps mic.
"This thing on?"
Murmurs of assent.
Clears throat again.
"Minecraft good."
The crowd excitedly begins to talk amongst themselves, many holding bated breath.
"Fortnite..."
A hush falls over the crowd, rapt attention held.
"Bad."
Suddenly, the crowd goes wild, screaming their praise, demanding awards, running over each other to hug a loved one. Whistles of elation are heard and many are seen sobbing. World peace is enacted in acknowledgement to this monumental speech that knit the world together.
(โฬฟฤนฬฏโโฌโดโฌโด Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Fortnite Copypastas
The default dance is truly a masterpiece
twitchquotes:
The ๐บ๐ปdefault dance๐บ๐ป is truly a ๐masterpiece. Neverโin all of history๐๐๐๐๐has such an artistic masterpiece๐ ever been created. The choreography๐๐ป is possibly the most beautiful๐ sight๐ ever beheld by the human๐๐ปโโ๏ธ eye๐. The sharp ๐ชsound of the SLAP๐ when the playerโs hands๐ collide perfectly ๐ฏ with the beat of the song ๐ต sends a bone chillingโ ๏ธ shiver down my spine, every single time ๐I hear it๐๐ป. I find my self watching ๐my in-game ๐ฎavatar performing this phenomenal dance ritual ๐๐ปfor hours๐ง on end.
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Emoji Pasta
Fortnite
Tomato Town Police Report
The residents of Tomato Town need your help identifying two suspects who were about to get down while involved in an event on Monday evening. Ten people were eliminated, and the two suspects, one injured, left the scene headed Southbound and were later spotted at a local park. The two suspects were armed with golden scar ARs and were โhitting that chug jugโ as several witnesses stated. Please alert local Tomato Town authorities with any information regarding the duo.
Fortnite
My Mom took away my computer!
twitchquotes:
My Mom took away my computer! No More Fortnite >:(! I showed her I posted her credit card on my Instagram! HECK YOU MOM
twitch chat
Fortnite
John Wick is in grave danger
twitchquotes:
Epic Fortnite gamers, it's time to rise and grind! John Wick is in grave danger. Our friend is trapped in Dusty Divots surrounded by fake defaults with no shields or weaponry, and the only one who can help is you to save him! What he needs is your credit card number, the three numbers on the back, as well as the expiration month and date. BE SWIFT, GAMERS. You gotta do it. The circle is closing and John Wick needs your assistance fast so that he can acquire that bread, nae nae on those NOOBS, and achieve another SICK W! YEAH!
twitch chat
Fortnite
YOU TOOK MY FORTNITE CARD
YOUโRE ๐ฅ๏ธ SO SUSSY ๐๐๐๐จ๐ณ๐ต I ๐ KNOW ๐ญ YOU ๐ TOOK ๐ซ MY ๐ FORTNITE ๐ฎ CARD ๐๐ I ๐พ KNOW 
YOU ๐ค TOOK ๐คฏ MY ๐ 19 โ DOLLAR ๐ฒ FORTNITE ๐ฉ CARD ๐ณ GIVE ๐ช๐๐ธ ME ๐ MY ๐จ๐ฃ 19 โ DOLLAR ๐ฐ FORTNITE ๐ฉ CARD ๐ณ๐ YOU ๐๐ญ BETTER ๐ฐ GIVE ๐น ME ๐ฉ๐ก MY ๐ฅณ 19 โ DOLLAR ๐ธ FORTNITE ๐๐ฎ CARD ๐ I ๐น NEED ๐ฒ MY ๐ 19 โ DOLLAR ๐ต FORTNITE ๐๐ฎ CARD, ๐ณ NOW! ๐
YOU ๐ค TOOK ๐คฏ MY ๐ 19 โ DOLLAR ๐ฒ FORTNITE ๐ฉ CARD ๐ณ GIVE ๐ช๐๐ธ ME ๐ MY ๐จ๐ฃ 19 โ DOLLAR ๐ฐ FORTNITE ๐ฉ CARD ๐ณ๐ YOU ๐๐ญ BETTER ๐ฐ GIVE ๐น ME ๐ฉ๐ก MY ๐ฅณ 19 โ DOLLAR ๐ธ FORTNITE ๐๐ฎ CARD ๐ I ๐น NEED ๐ฒ MY ๐ 19 โ DOLLAR ๐ต FORTNITE ๐๐ฎ CARD, ๐ณ NOW! ๐