[Copypasta] John Cena eats Bing Chilling

Zǎoshang hǎo zhōngguó xiànzài wǒ yǒu BING CHILLING 🥶🍦 wǒ hěn xǐhuān BING CHILLING 🥶🍦 dànshì sùdù yǔ jīqíng 9 bǐ BING CHILLING 🥶🍦 sùdù yǔ jīqíng sùdù yǔ jīqíng 9 wǒ zuì xǐhuān suǒyǐ…xiànzài shì yīnyuè shíjiān zhǔnbèi 1 2 3 liǎng gè lǐbài yǐhòu sùdù yǔ jīqíng 9 ×3 bùyào wàngjì bùyào cu òguò jìdé qù diànyǐngyuàn kàn sùdù yǔ jīqíng 9 yīn wéi fēicháng hǎo diànyǐng dòngzuò fēicháng hǎo chàbùduō yīyàng BING CHILLING 🥶🍦zàijiàn 🥶🍦
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