[Copypasta] I just shit and cum FAQ (Reddit)

I just shit and cum. # FAQ ## What does this mean? The amount of shit (and cum) on my computer and floor has increased by one. ## Why did you do this? There are several reasons I may deem a comment to be worthy of feces or ejaculation. These include, but are not limited to: * Being gay * Dank copypasta bro, where'd you find it * walter ## Am I going to shit and cum too? No - not yet. But you should refrain from shitposting and cumposting like this in the future. Otherwise I will be forced to shit and cum again, which may put your shitting and cumming privileges in jeopardy. ## I don't believe my comment deserved being shit and cum at. Can you un-cum it? Sure, mistakes happen. But only in exceedingly rare circumstances will I put shit back into my butt. If you would like to issue an appeal, shoot me a hot load explaining what I got wrong. I tend to respond to retaliatory ejaculation within several minutes. Do note, however, that over 99.9% of semen dies before it can fertilize the egg, and yours is likely no exception. ## How can I prevent this from happening in the future? Accept the goopy brown and white substance and move on. But learn from this mistake: your behavior will not be tolerated in my mom's basement. I will continue to shit and cum until you improve your conduct. Remember: ejaculation is privilege, not a right.
November 2021
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

This ELO IS UNFAIR

twitchquotes: SwiftRage :loudspeaker: THIS ELO IS UNFAIR! SwiftRage :loudspeaker: TIMTHEFATMAN IS IN THERE! SwiftRage :loudspeaker: LOSING EVERY GAME SESSION! SwiftRage :loudspeaker: GIVING HIS TEAM DEPRESSION! SwiftRage :loudspeaker:
twitch chat
December 2016
TimTheTatman

Overwatch

Disabled sign

⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯⣯ ⣯⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣯⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣧⣏⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇ ⣏⣧⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣯⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣇⣧⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣯ ⣧⣏⣇⣇⣇⣧⣧⣯⣯⡀⠀⠀⣤⣶⣿⣧⣏⣏⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇ ⣯⣯⣇⣧⣯⠛⠉⣿⣇⣇⠀⠀⣯⣏⣇⣇⣧⣧⣇⣧⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣏ ⣯⣯⠟⠁⠀⠀⣤⣿⣧⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇ ⣯⠋⠀⠀⣴⣿⣇⣧⣯⣯⠀⠀⢰⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣇⣏⣏⣧⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇⣇ ⡏⠀⠀⣾⣯⣯⣏⣧⣏⣯⠀⠀⠈⠋⠋⠋⠋⠋⠋⠋⠋⠋⣯⣧⣧⣇⣇⣇⣧⣇ ⡂⠀⠀⣇⣧⣯⣧⣇⣇⣯⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣄⠀⠀⢫⣧⣏⣇⣇⣧⣇ ⣧⠀⠀⣿⣇⣯⣏⣯⣇⣇⣧⣏⣏⣇⣧⣧⣏⡏⠙⣧⣏⣦⠀⠀⠻⣧⣇⣇⣏⣇ ⣏⣄⠀⠈⢿⣧⣇⣇⣇⣇⣧⣏⣏⣏⣏⣯⠋⠀⠀⣼⣧⣯⣷⠀⠀⠙⣯⠏⢻⣏ ⣯⣏⣦⠀⠀⠈⠛⢿⣇⣧⣇⣧⣇⠟⠋⠀⠀⢀⣾⣇⣧⣇⣯⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣿ ⣇⣇⣇⣏⣶⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣤⣾⣯⣯⣯⣧⣧⣧⣇⣏⣦⣮⣮⣮⣮
January 2021

Secret Puerto Rican lover

twitchquotes: Hola, Kripp, this is Antonio, Rania's secret Puerto Rican lover. I mistakenly left a package of my Magnum XXL Heavy-Duty Condoms at your place last night while you were complaining about a children's card game. I was hoping I could swing by tonight and pick them up. I'll just go in through the backdoor just like how I do with Rania, the dirty girl! Thanks, and good luck with your funny little computer game!
twitch chat
May 2016
Kripp

Classic

nature has molded females to become a holy being

nature has molded females to become a holy being. they must be worshipped at all costs. since they lack the barbaric y chromosome and testosterone, they are unaggressive and thus good people. they are prophets, they are guides. questioning them is foolish and expecting 💦 for free is blasphemy. i will protect women at all costs and sacrifice everything for them because even their motherhood is a natural wonder. simping is a way of life. it is worship. would you make fun of a muslim for praying? then don't make fun of me either
October 2021

Simps

Alright, rogue I guess

twitchquotes: ResidentSleeper "Alright, rogue, I guess" ResidentSleeper "Haven't picked mage in a while, let's go mage ResidentSleeper "Paladin isn't that good, but alright" ResidentSleeper
twitch chat
May 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

Text-to-Speech Playing