[Copypasta] I just shit and cum FAQ (Reddit)

I just shit and cum. # FAQ ## What does this mean? The amount of shit (and cum) on my computer and floor has increased by one. ## Why did you do this? There are several reasons I may deem a comment to be worthy of feces or ejaculation. These include, but are not limited to: * Being gay * Dank copypasta bro, where'd you find it * walter ## Am I going to shit and cum too? No - not yet. But you should refrain from shitposting and cumposting like this in the future. Otherwise I will be forced to shit and cum again, which may put your shitting and cumming privileges in jeopardy. ## I don't believe my comment deserved being shit and cum at. Can you un-cum it? Sure, mistakes happen. But only in exceedingly rare circumstances will I put shit back into my butt. If you would like to issue an appeal, shoot me a hot load explaining what I got wrong. I tend to respond to retaliatory ejaculation within several minutes. Do note, however, that over 99.9% of semen dies before it can fertilize the egg, and yours is likely no exception. ## How can I prevent this from happening in the future? Accept the goopy brown and white substance and move on. But learn from this mistake: your behavior will not be tolerated in my mom's basement. I will continue to shit and cum until you improve your conduct. Remember: ejaculation is privilege, not a right.
November 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

I know my opinion is irrelevant because I am a pleb

twitchquotes: I know my opinion is irrelevant because I am a pleb, but hear me out. Are us plebs as insignificant as we are made out to be? If there were no plebs, could there be any subs? I know were seen as copypasta bots, but I am a pleb and I am PROUD. SET AN EXAMPLE FOR US, FELLOW PLEBS, DO NOT FUCKING COPY AND PASTE THIS!
twitch chat
January 2015
imaqtpie

plebs vs subs

4House

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠋⢀⣀⡄⡀⠙⠿⣿⣿⡏⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⡁⠄⡓⡩⠐⠚⠲⣈⡢⣈⠛⢷⠄⠄⠄⠄⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠄⠊⣴⠖⠂⣠⣶⣷⣄⡉⠸⠧⡵⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⠋⡁⠐⢥⡚⠑⣁⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣄⠙⠉⣳⡀⠄⠄⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠟⠉⠠⣂⠔⠌⢀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⡈⠣⠍⣶⠄⠉⠻⣿⣿ ⡂⢄⠒⠈⣠⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣄⠙⠒⡃⢀⠄⠙ ⠔⠄⠄⠈⠁⠄⠈⠉⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⠉⠉⠙⠛⠛⠛⠛⠳⠄⠈⠉⠤⢳ ⣄⣤⣤⠘⠛⠛⠓⠄⣀⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣤⣤⡶⠿⠿⣷⣶⣤⣤⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀ ⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣤⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣤⣤⣴⣿⣿⣿⣷⠄⠄⢠⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⣠⣾⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡁⠈⠙⠛⠛⠉⠉⠉⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠄⣸⣿⣿ ⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⢀⣿⣿⣿ ⣤⣿⣿⣿⣯⣀⠄⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠉⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⣀⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡀⠙⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⠁⢠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣷⣆⠈⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄⠄⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
February 2019

GME stock and WSB vs short sellers

Let me tell you what happens tomorrow because it's even worse than what happened today. There they are, Melvin Capital. Furiously jerking their 2 inch boomer cocks to their GME short gainz. They are so close, edging themselves with "Oh yeah, the next Blockbuster" and "Yes baby, brick and mortar go bye-bye." They even sit in a circle sucking and jerking each other off, double fisting like they're skiing down Mt. Everest with cocks instead of poles. Out of nowhere, Ryan Cohen steps in with the most massive and vieniest schlong they've ever seen. He starts eating their lunch and muttering about Cheey for games and they can't do anything because their engorged penises are stuck in eachothers mouths and poop chutes. They attempt to ignorr him and try to keep jerking but they accidentally used hand sanitizer instead of lotion. BAM GME starts rising from the ashes and the retards of WSB are lighting the fires. We brought lighters that we borrowed from our wives boyfriend's and they weren't those shitty clear one. We have motherfucking Bics and torches. Melvin is crying and pleading but we are too retarded to understand coherent English. They see giant red dildos on their screens and their buttholes begin to pucker. They dump everything they have at us in an attempt to supress the price but again, we only understand broken english and emojis. We only understand basic visuals and colors. When we see green, we buy. When we see red, we take out another student loan or CC cash advance and we buy more. We are fucking unstoppable. GME skyrockets and they start scrambling to pull dicks out of random orifices, but it's too late. Bears R Fuk. After we are done splooging all over their faces, and becoming their wife's new boyfriends, we throw Melvin and BOA on the chopping block to be liquidated and disposed of. That's what happens tomorrow, and we are gonna turn that shit into a movie.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Kripp the adult film actor

twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Ban one 12 year old, get the whole 9gag

twitchquotes: :tf: BAN :tf: ONE :tf: 12 :tf: YEAR :tf: OLD :tf: AND :tf: YOU :tf: GET :tf: THE :tf: WHOLE :tf: 9GAG :tf:
twitch chat
February 2017

MODS

Classic

Ban X Get The Whole Y

Text-to-Speech Playing