[Copypasta] Kangaroos vs Uruguayans

This does not change the fact that in Australia there are 48 million kangaroos and in Uruguay there are 3,457,380 inhabitants. So if the kangaroos decide to invade Uruguay, each Uruguayan will have to fight 14 kangaroos...
October 2021
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⠄⠄⠄⣿⣶⣦⣤⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣤⣴⡶⠿⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⠄⣭⣍⠄⣿⣟⣛⣛⡂⢰⣶⣄⢸⣿⠄⠄⠄⣿⡇⠰⣶⣶⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣤⣼⣿⠄⣿⣏⣉⣉⡁⢸⣿⠙⠿⣿⢠⣤⠄⣿⣧⣤⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⡀⠄⠄⢀⡀⠄⠄⢀⡀⠄⠄⢀⠄⠄⠄⡀⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠙⠄⠄⠄⠃⠄⠄⠘⠄⠄⠄⠘⠃⠄⠄⠈⠄⠄⠄⠈⠄⠄⠄⠃⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠄⠄⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠘⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⠄⠄⢹⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄⠄⣠⣿⣿⣿⡿⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⣸⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣇⣴⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⣿⣿⡿⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠙⢿⠄⠄⡿⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
July 2021

GME stock and WSB vs short sellers

Let me tell you what happens tomorrow because it's even worse than what happened today. There they are, Melvin Capital. Furiously jerking their 2 inch boomer cocks to their GME short gainz. They are so close, edging themselves with "Oh yeah, the next Blockbuster" and "Yes baby, brick and mortar go bye-bye." They even sit in a circle sucking and jerking each other off, double fisting like they're skiing down Mt. Everest with cocks instead of poles. Out of nowhere, Ryan Cohen steps in with the most massive and vieniest schlong they've ever seen. He starts eating their lunch and muttering about Cheey for games and they can't do anything because their engorged penises are stuck in eachothers mouths and poop chutes. They attempt to ignorr him and try to keep jerking but they accidentally used hand sanitizer instead of lotion. BAM GME starts rising from the ashes and the retards of WSB are lighting the fires. We brought lighters that we borrowed from our wives boyfriend's and they weren't those shitty clear one. We have motherfucking Bics and torches. Melvin is crying and pleading but we are too retarded to understand coherent English. They see giant red dildos on their screens and their buttholes begin to pucker. They dump everything they have at us in an attempt to supress the price but again, we only understand broken english and emojis. We only understand basic visuals and colors. When we see green, we buy. When we see red, we take out another student loan or CC cash advance and we buy more. We are fucking unstoppable. GME skyrockets and they start scrambling to pull dicks out of random orifices, but it's too late. Bears R Fuk. After we are done splooging all over their faces, and becoming their wife's new boyfriends, we throw Melvin and BOA on the chopping block to be liquidated and disposed of. That's what happens tomorrow, and we are gonna turn that shit into a movie.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Dear Mr. Morosan, this is Sister Agatha

twitchquotes: Dear Mr. Morosan, this is Sister Agatha from the preschool down the road. Did you and Rania have a child recently? I ask because of all the crying and whining I've heard coming from your house. The only explanation is that there is an immature person in there, and surely that wouldn't be you, a fine emotionally-stable adult! Please come by and I'll give the child a free lesson in manners! Cheers, Agatha.
twitch chat
April 2018
Kripp

Classic

neverlucky

If the human body is 75% water...

twitchquotes: If the human body is 75% water, how can you be 100% salt? Kappa
twitch chat
September 2015
Reynad

salty

Rick

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣷⡄⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣀⣠⣤⣤⡤⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣋⣅⣀⣀⣌⠉⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⣿⡟⠋⠉⠀⠀⠉⠙⠻⢶⡌⢻⣿⣿⠁⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣠⣾⣿⣧⣶⣦⣄⢀⣤⣶⣦⣄⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⣀ ⠀⣰⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⠆⠀⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠁ ⠀⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⣿⠻⠿⠟⡃⠀⠻⠿⠿⠟⠀⠀⣿⣿⣶⣄⠀⠀ ⠀⢹⣿⣤⣤⣄⣀⠀⠾⠿⣿⡀⠀⠀⣇⣼⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠙⣿⣿⡿⠿⠀ ⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⢀⣼⡧⢀⣠⣤⣤⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣶⣿⣍⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠘⠿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠀⠀⠈⠽⢷⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡷⠂⠀⢠⣿⡍⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣼⠉⢧⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣡⢽⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⣠⠞⠃⠀⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠘⡇⠀⠘⡆⠀⠀⠀⢸⣸⢼⡽⣿⣷⣄⢰⣿⣦⣄⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⣷⣶⡄⢠⠎⠀⠀⣰⢟⣿⣿⣿⣿⢻⡄⠈⢳⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⢀⡇⠀⣰⠋⠀⣤⣼⠏⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⠘⣷⠀⠀⢳⡀⠀⠀⠀ ⢀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠈⣇⣵⠃⠀⢠⣿⡏⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿⡏⠀⢹⡆⠀⠈⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠉⠉⠀⣠⣾⣿⠻⣄⣻⣿⣿⣿⡇⣤⡾⠃⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀
April 2020
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