[Copypasta] Do not call your significant other honey

Do ๐Ÿ‘ not ๐Ÿ‘ call ๐Ÿ‘ your ๐Ÿ‘ significant ๐Ÿ‘ other ๐Ÿ‘ honey ๐Ÿ‘ unless ๐Ÿ‘ you ๐Ÿ‘ are ๐Ÿ‘ a ๐Ÿ‘ bee ๐Ÿ‘ you ๐Ÿ‘ are ๐Ÿ‘ appropriating ๐Ÿ‘ bee ๐Ÿ‘ culture, ๐Ÿ‘ this ๐Ÿ‘ cannot ๐Ÿ‘ bee ๐Ÿ‘ accepted ๐Ÿ‘
October 2021
(โ–€ฬฟฤนฬฏโ”œโ”ฌโ”ดโ”ฌโ”ด Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Kripp reluctantly crawls into bed

twitchquotes: Kripp reluctantly crawls into bed where a breathless Hafu is waiting. She takes hold of his hand and whispers, "It's ok, I broke up with Jake." He squeezes her hand, let's go, squeezes again, "You're the best female arena player...," Kripp says dejectedly, "But I made a vow to Rania to never love another woman." Hafu runs her hands lovingly down his cheek, "You're not cheating," she whispers, "I'm really Amaz."
twitch chat
August 2018
Kripp

Eating chicken wings beside Tenz

twitchquotes: one time i was eating chicken wings beside tenz at a pub in canada, and he is wearing white sweatpants and the black and red SEN jersey and i was eating a flat and i took a bite out of it and the bone popped out and flip up in the air, and i swore to god that time slow down and i was like "omg holy shit, somebody stop this", i couldnt react whilst watching the bone spinning around and then the chicken wing drops but tenz moves his leg away while the bone was split-second away from touching his white sweatpants and i look dead in his eyes and said "omg dude, im so sorry" and tenz that totally silence all the time while enjoying his boroviฤka look over towards me and said "i knew it would happen" then look away, stood up and walk off, i never been so awe in my life and then i knew this guy is and will be a great valorant player, this guy is cold as fuck like his in-game name and he is fast as hell its how he dodges the chicken wing bone and its how he fucked 100t balls deep while keeping his composure, its no coincidence, im telling you its all interconnected because what kind of person you're in real life, translated to how you are as a player in valorant.
twitch chat
June 2021
TenZ

Valorant

These aren't the dongs you're looking for

twitchquotes: เผผ ยบู„อŸยบเผผ ยบู„อŸยบ เผฝ ใƒฝ( อกยฐโ•ญอœส–โ•ฎอกยฐ )๏พ‰ These aren't the dongs you're looking for (โ–€ฬฟฤนฬฏโ–€ฬฟ ฬฟ)(โ–€ฬฟฤนฬฏโ–€ฬฟ ฬฟ)
twitch chat
December 2014
Forsen

Endgame spoilers

twitchquotes: I just saw endgame, and it was pretty good, but there were a few weird things. I thought it was strange how the Russo Brothers decided to render Thanosโ€™ erect penis in such vivid detail. The veins were so perfectly done I couldnโ€™t even tell his cock wasnโ€™t real. Another thing I found weird was when Black Panther broke the fourth wall and gave the audience the n-word pass. I did appreciate it, but it would feel more in place in a Deadpool movie. Overall, it was still excellent, but I think that they definitely need to reconsider some things.
twitch chat
May 2019

Fired for masturbating on a Zoom call

So this just happened an hour ago and I am still shaking. Iโ€™m a staff in public accounting and was in the middle of a 3-hour training on Zoom. Usually when we have these types of calls I just keep the video running in the background and I walk around the room doing things to pass the time and distract myself from the monotone presenters. Well today I forgot that I left the camera on (I usually always have it off but earlier today I had a call with the partner to discuss my upcoming promotion, so I had to have it on). I had no clue I had left the camera on and in the middle of walking around and muttering to myself as I was zoning out, I flipped it out and started to rub one out. I did so with complete confidence, openly and ferociously, stroking faster and faster until I heard the presenter stop and kindly asked me to turn my camera off. Mortified, I lifted my pants up and rushed over to turn the camera off. Soon after the training was over I had a call with HR and they let me know that I was being terminated. I hated the job anyway so not so bummed about that, but Iโ€™m not sure what to say in interviews now if Iโ€™m asked why I left this job. Any advice?
June 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing