Fuck this is so embarrassing. I'm literally shaking so hard rn. So like the randy horny mf I am, I was jerking off and edging myself before one of my online classes. Then the class started so I joined. Our teacher's pretty strict and all and expects cameras on at all times. So I just sat there whilst everyone joined, still horny as hell. I had my dick pressed between my legs still. Teacher's going round asking us how the weekend went yada yada. So now it's my turn to speak. I unmute my mic to say my stuff and whilst I'm talking I squeeze my legs a little too hard and come hard as fuck causing to me to literally moan LIKE A FUCKING WHALE and make my horrid contorted orgasm face RIGHT ON FUCKING CAMERA WITH MY MIC UNMUTED WHILST THE ENTIRE CLASS OF 40 STUDENTS ARE WATCHING. LET'S NOT EVEN FORGET THAT MY FACE WAS FULL-SCREEN WHILST I WAS SPEAKING. In a total crazy panic, I leave the class.
I'm dropping that class asap. No, scratch that. Dropping out of college altogether. No way can I go back there again. Might as well drop off this earth while I'm at it.
(βΜΏΔΉΜ―ββ¬β΄β¬β΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas
Popsicle burglaries
twitchquotes:
Local police are baffled by a string of strange popsicle burglaries that have taken place over the past few days. The thief appears to be ignoring cash, jewelry, and other valuables, only taking sugary treats from the residents' freezers. Police have yet to apprehend the burglar, but have several reports of a suspicious lanky figure with poor hygiene seen near the crime scenes muttering about "value." Any further information on the popsicle bandit should be reported immediately.
twitch chat
Kripp
Dat Boi isn't so great?
twitchquotes:
Dat Boi isn't so great? Are you kidding me? When was the last time you saw a meme with such hilarity and re-usability online? Dat Boi puts the memes in another level, and we will be blessed if we ever see a meme of it's caliber and passion for the memes again. Pepe breaks records. Le toucan breaks records. Dat boi breaks the rules. You can keep your copypastas. I prefer the frog
twitch chat
Morons will copy anything if it's long enough
twitchquotes:
Morons in this chat will copy anything you say if it's long enough. They won't even read the entire message. They just see a paragraph of text and instinctually copy it and paste it as if they wrote it themselves. It's actually sad how brain dead you people can be, copying and pasting things that have no meaning only because it caught your attention. 
twitch chat
I hate Twitch Chat
salty
Sense of pride and accomplishment
twitchquotes:
The π° intent π° is π° to π° provide π° players π° with π° a π° sense π° of π° pride π° and π° accomplishment π° for π° unlocking π° different π° heroes. π° As π° for π° cost, π° we π° selected π° initial π° values π° based π° upon π° data π° from π° the π° Open π° Beta π° and π° other π° adjustments π° made π° to π° milestone π° rewards π° before π° launch. π° Among π° other π° things, π° we're π° looking π° at π° average π° per-player π° credit π° earn π° rates π° on π° a π° daily π° basis, π° and π° we'll π° be π° making π° constant π° adjustments π° to π° ensure π° that π° players π° have π° challenges π° that π° are π° compelling, π° rewarding, π° and π° of π° course π° attainable π° via π° gameplay. We π° appreciate π° the π° candid π° feedback, π° and π° the π° passion π° the π° community π° has π° put π° forth π° around π° the π° current π° topics π° here π° on π° Reddit, π° our π° forums π° and π° across π° numerous π° social π° media π° outlets. Our π° team π° will π° continue π° to π° make π° changes π° and π° monitor π° community π° feedback π° and π° update π° everyone π° as π° soon π° and π° as π° often π° as π° we π° can. π°
twitch chat
Doge
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