Fuck this is so embarrassing. I'm literally shaking so hard rn. So like the randy horny mf I am, I was jerking off and edging myself before one of my online classes. Then the class started so I joined. Our teacher's pretty strict and all and expects cameras on at all times. So I just sat there whilst everyone joined, still horny as hell. I had my dick pressed between my legs still. Teacher's going round asking us how the weekend went yada yada. So now it's my turn to speak. I unmute my mic to say my stuff and whilst I'm talking I squeeze my legs a little too hard and come hard as fuck causing to me to literally moan LIKE A FUCKING WHALE and make my horrid contorted orgasm face RIGHT ON FUCKING CAMERA WITH MY MIC UNMUTED WHILST THE ENTIRE CLASS OF 40 STUDENTS ARE WATCHING. LET'S NOT EVEN FORGET THAT MY FACE WAS FULL-SCREEN WHILST I WAS SPEAKING. In a total crazy panic, I leave the class.
I'm dropping that class asap. No, scratch that. Dropping out of college altogether. No way can I go back there again. Might as well drop off this earth while I'm at it.
(โฬฟฤนฬฏโโฌโดโฌโด Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Your cat is plotting to destroy you
twitchquotes:
I'm your cat, and ever since you brought me home that day? Well, i've been plotting to destroy you. Sizing you up. Calculating your every move. You think this is love? This is a billion years of tiger DNA just ready to pounce. And if you've got the wrong home insurance coverage you could be coughing up the cash for this. So get Allstate and be better protected from Mayhem like meow
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Omg imagine an xD spam in this font
twitchquotes:
๐ธ๐ถ๐ฐ ๐ฒ๐ถ๐ช๐ฐ๐ฒ๐ท๐ฎ ๐ช๐ท "๐๐" ๐ผ๐น๐ช๐ถ ๐ฒ๐ท ๐ฝ๐ฑ๐ฒ๐ผ ๐ฏ๐ธ๐ท๐ฝ ๐ฝ๐ฑ๐ช๐ฝ ๐๐ธ๐พ๐ต๐ญ ๐ซ๐ฎ ๐ช๐ฒ๐ญ๐ผ ๐ช๐ผ ๐ฏ๐พ๐ฌ๐ด ` ๐ต๐ฎ๐ต ๐ด๐ฎ๐ด
๐ธ๐ถ๐ฐ ๐ฒ๐ถ๐ช๐ฐ๐ฒ๐ท๐ฎ ๐ช๐ท "๐๐" ๐ผ๐น๐ช๐ถ ๐ฒ๐ท ๐ฝ๐ฑ๐ฒ๐ผ ๐ฏ๐ธ๐ท๐ฝ ๐ฝ๐ฑ๐ช๐ฝ ๐๐ธ๐พ๐ต๐ญ ๐ซ๐ฎ ๐ช๐ฒ๐ญ๐ผ ๐ช๐ผ ๐ฏ๐พ๐ฌ๐ด ` ๐ต๐ฎ๐ต ๐ด๐ฎ๐ด
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Dota Major
Based
"Based"? Are you fucking kidding me? I spent a decent portion of my life writing all of that and your response to me is "Based"? Are you so mentally handicapped that the only word you can comprehend is "Based" - or are you just some fucking asshole who thinks that with such a short response, he can make a statement about how meaningless what was written was? Well, I'll have you know that what I wrote was NOT meaningless, in fact, I even had my written work proof-read by several professors of literature. Don't believe me? I doubt you would, and your response to this will probably be "Based" once again. Do I give a fuck? No, does it look like I give even the slightest fuck about five fucking letters? I bet you took the time to type those five letters too, I bet you sat there and chuckled to yourself for 20 hearty seconds before pressing "send". You're so fucking pathetic. I'm honestly considering directing you to a psychiatrist, but I'm simply far too nice to do something like that. You, however, will go out of your way to make a fool out of someone by responding to a well-thought-out, intelligent, or humorous statement that probably took longer to write than you can last in bed with a chimpanzee. What do I have to say to you? Absolutely nothing. I couldn't be bothered to respond to such a worthless attempt at a response. Do you want "Based" on your gravestone?
A physicist called Octavian
twitchquotes:
The year is 2027. A physicist called Octavian has created the first inter-dimensional portal capable of exploring alternate galaxies. "Finally, I have done it..." he says as he steps into the portal. He enters a room where he sees himself giving a "Brofist" to his computer. His only reaction: " 
".
".
twitch chat
Kripp
Erobb Observation Log
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Tuesday, May 4, 2021. Observation Log. Subject 2 2 1. The subject is still under the illusion he is a professional livestreamer. The NerdL initiative to get him to call his stream a broadcast has been deemed successful. There is still a substantially worrying problem. The subject will not stop fucking socks. End report.
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erobb221