[Copypasta] Yeah I'm a virgin, so what?

Yeah I'm a virgin, so what? I'm waiting for the "right one", there's nothing wrong with that. Just because I'm 36 doesn't make it "weird" or make me a "loser". I have standards. I'm not going to give away my state of chastity to some bar/club "whore"; that's just not the kind of guy I am. I require a REAL women that will hold and care for me gently, and who can, above all else, love me for who I am. Once I find that person, I'll happily donate my virginity away. Until then, I am fine being a virgin. Besides, I have a fleshlight, so it's not like I don't know how it feels anyway. Maybe one day you immature keyboard cretins will understand that life isn't about just having sex for the accomplishment, it's about love and finding the "one" to share that experience with.
September 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

You have to concede... He has a wisp

twitchquotes: You have to concede... He has a wisp
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March 2014
Hafu

Kripp throws his paintbrush across the room

twitchquotes: Kripp throws his paintbrush across the room. "The canvas needed to topdeck exactly that color to win!" he yells. Dex brings Kripp his paintbrush and Kripp tries again. He tries to paint a happy tree but paints a sad cactus. "The canvas is obviously sniping. How else could it know I was painting a happy tree?" Dex barks. "Quiet, Dex!" screams Kripp as he paints the bottom right of the canvas and concedes.
twitch chat
November 2018
Kripp

I finally did it. I out-pizza'd the Hut

I finally did it. I out-pizza'd the Hut. It was the greatest mistake of my life. After years of perfecting my recipe, I made my way down to the local hut, fresh-baked pizza pie in hand. "Try this," I told the kid working the counter. He did, and he had to agree that it was better than anything Pizza Hut had to offer. Soon, the entire store, customers included, was feasting on my delicious pie. The manager walked over, grabbed a slice, and took a bite. I look at him, anticipation rising. This was the boss, the local fief lord of the Hut. His approval meant more to me than all the rest combined. He took a bite and nodded. "I'll be damned," he said, "you really did it. You out-pizza'd the Hut. Shame." Shame? What did he mean by tha- the manager pulled a gun out from behind his apron and shot the nearest customer in the head. "We have a Code JalapeΓ±o," he said into his wrist as he executed the remaining customers. "I repeat, we have a Code JalapeΓ±o." The ground was slick with blood. The kid working the counter choked out his dying breath as the manager turned to me. "You just had to do it motherfucker. You just had to out-pizza the Hut." He shoved the gun in my face. I was too scared to fight, too scared to run. The manager pulled the trigger. A click. The gun was empty. I threw a chair at the manager and scrambled out of the Pizza Hut, not even bothering to see if my missile hit its mark. I was closely pursued by the manager, who had gotten his hands on a deadly sharp pizza cutter. I suspected in his hands it would cut more than pizza. Somehow, I was able to get into my car and speed off, the manager cursing my existence as I left him behind. I took a deep breath. The manager was clearly psychotic. Yes, that was it, just a crazy man with a gun. It had to be. My phone rang. Sister. I picked it. "They're dead, she sobbed. They're all dead. M-mom, dad, Chris, Bill. Dead. They killed them all." I could barely understand her, so great were her sobs. "What do you mean? Where are you?" I asked urgently. "How is this possi-" a single gunshot sounded through my phone's speakers. Silence. Then, I heard a man's voice. "No one out-pizzas the Hut." He hung up. I drove down the empty county road, mind blank. I had nothing. They killed my family. I was alone. At that moment I knew what I had to do. They took everything from me. Well then, I would take everything from them. Pizza Hut was so terrified of being out-pizza'd, they forgot there's one thing worse than a man with a recipe: A man with nothing to lose. I'll give them a limited time offer they won't be able to refuse: two bullets for the price of one. With a free side order of pain.
May 2021

Leffen's ego and pride is a hard obstacle

twitchquotes: don't get me wrong i love leffen he is the only smasher showing "conventional fighting game" players that there is more than auto combos/ light mid heavy combo's but ass far as us smash players are concernerd he doesn't know what he's talking about ego and pride is a hard obstacle to ovwercome
twitch chat
April 2019
leffen

Super Smash Bros

The D: emote has been banned

twitchquotes: β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€” imGlitch The D: emote has been banned from this channel β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”
twitch chat
September 2018
Text-to-Speech Playing