[Copypasta] Only the chosen one can fist both asses

twitchquotes: (‿ˠ‿) _(‿ˠ‿) only the chosen one can fist both asses. ⎝ Kreygasm
twitch chat
June 2016
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More Copypastas

Please refrain from likening us to plebeians

twitchquotes: Twitch streamers and their subscribers define us (not subscribed audience) as members of a lower social class, plebs as they call it. I find it inappropriate to compare us with ancient Rome's lowest class as there is nothing ignominious to being a member of the proletariat. Also their living standards were significantly inferior to ours (e.g. health, education) so the comparison is unsound. In the future, please refrain from likening us to plebeians because descriminating due to economic and social status like that is reprehensible in our modern society.
twitch chat
November 2018

Classic

plebs vs subs

The year is 2030. The AOC is now the Supreme Emperor of the United States and the Americas

The year is 2030. The AOC is now the Supreme Emperor of the United States and the Americas, and has successfully executed her forced feminization program, converting 72% of the us male population into women, the remaining 28% either existing peacefully as femboy subs or have fled the country, if they're lucky. All references to Dr. Seuss, Mr. Potatohead, and other such martyrs and thoughtcrimes will lead to prompt and inevitable cancellation by means of Jewish space laser. All statues of white people have been torn down and replaced with statues of AOC alongside Mao Zedong and Che Guevara, and the public has thus collectively forgotten about Robert E. Lee. The constitution has its 28th amendment, codifying mandatory cock and ball torture for all penis-having citizens no less than twice a week. It is illegal to say "Merry Christmas". Heterosexual relationships are strictly forbidden. Attack Helicopter, with pronouns brr/brrs, is a gender recognized on the official list of 93. The police have been almost entirely defunded, nationally having an annual budget of $5.30, enough for a single Big Mac Combo Meal. There is a new arm of the state, namely the "rape police" whose sole duty is functionally a secret task force to ensure all consent is affirmative and enthusiastic. All citizens must pledge allegiance to the LGBTQIA+ rainbow flag and swear oaths on White Fragility by Robin DiAngelo. All g*mers have been deported. Mexico is now the 53rd state, behind Puerto Rico and Washington DC. All bathrooms are gender-neutral. Marxism, the theory proposing the government do a lot of things, has become the official state ideology, including mandatory education on critical race theory beginning in pre-K. White people are second class citizens, guilty of being white, and all white people must publicly apologize on the behalf of their race as a coming-of-age ceremony at the beginning of pubescence. Facts now care about feelings. We will no longer be subjugated by AOC and her inner party, the Squad. The Culture War is not over. We will not be cancelled. We are the resista— radio static
March 2021

Prize pool of 4 potatoes

twitchquotes: Hello, my name is Boris Ilya Pistolento. I'm from a small village in cold Siberia. For many years I dreamed of a profession, Cardstone player! But tetris all I can do. One day a trucker was crash in the back of the house of mine and a box fell out. It was the commodore 64, my dreaming is comming to reality. Now I can join the local tournamento, the prize pool of which 4 potatoes. Please no Copy-Pasta!
twitch chat
December 2014
Forsen

Hearthstone

American website, American computers, American game

twitchquotes: Europoors hating on USA ✓ on a American website ✓ with American computers ✓ on the American invented Internet ✓ watching an American made game ✓ From a country that was liberated and protected by America ✓✓✓
twitch chat
June 2016

Classic

EU vs NA

Frodan, be nicer to Kripp

twitchquotes: "Frodan, be nicer to Kripp," Reynad says in his office at Tempo Storm HQ. "I was just having a laugh," replies Frodan. "I know, but he's a casual and sensitive. Apologize to him. I'm inviting him over to 'cast' a 'tournament' and want him in a good mood," Reynad winks. Frodan bows and says, "Yes master."
twitch chat
January 2015
Reynad

Hearthstone

Text-to-Speech Playing