[Copypasta] Joe Biden eat hot chip and lie

twitchquotes: He lets out a sigh and then a plastic smile. “Under the Biden administration,” he says, carefully “There will be a few new rules. It will be forbidden to cook,” The crowd gasps. “Everyone will have to eat McDonalds,” Jill hangs her head in shame. “You may have to charge your phone. You may have to twerk. Hell, you may even have to be bisexual.” An uproar starts in the crowd, but Biden ushers a silence with his next words “But it will all be worth it when we as a people can eat hot chip and lie. Thank you.” Biden leaves the podium to a thunderous applause. America is saved.
twitch chat
November 2020
I used to be a real ad
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Solo is one of my favorite Star Wars movies

twitchquotes: Action-packed, fast-paced while exploring deeper themes of oppression, power, and values... what's not to love?! Solo is personally one of my favorite Star Wars movies. Plenty of throwbacks to the old films while offering some foreshadowing. [$0.25 deposited in your PayPal™. Remember to delete this part before posting]
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I sexually Identify as a Lamborghini

twitchquotes: I sexually Identify as a LAMBORGHINI. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of DRIVing UP HERE IN THE HOLLYWOOD HILLS. People say to me that a person being a LAMBORGHINI is Impossible and I’m MATERIALISTIC but I don’t care, I’m this NEW LAMBORGHINI HERE. I’m having a plastic surgeon install , 7 NEW bookshelves and 2000 new books on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me “NEW LAMBORGHINI HERE” and respect my right to DRIVE UP HERE IN THE HOLLYWOOD HILLS. If you can’t accept me you’re a LAMBOphobe and need to check your GNAWLIDGE. Thank you, and I'll see you on my website.
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I just nutted to your comment FAQ (Reddit)

I just nutted to your comment. # FAQ ## What does this mean? The amount of cum (semen) on my phone and Reddit phone has increased by one. ## Why did you do this? There are several reasons I may deem a comment to be worthy of cum. These include, but are not limited to: • ⁠you being a femboy, • ⁠Spreading sti infections, • ⁠Sarcasm correctly flagged with a /s. ## Am I banned from the Reddit? No. But you should make comments like this in the future. Otherwise I will be forced to not cum. ## I don't believe my comment deserved a nut. Can you un-nut to it? Sure, mistakes happen. But only in exceedingly rare circumstances will I undo a nut. If you would like to issue an appeal, shoot your nut on me. I tend to respond to Being shot with nut within several minutes. Do note, however, that over 99.9% of nut appeals are rejected, and yours is likely no exception. ## How can I prevent this from happening in the future? Accept the nut and move on. your behavior will be nutted to on Reddit.com. I will continue to nut until you stop being so hot 😩 Remember: I’m horny uwu
June 2021

Reddit

Le Boobhead has arrived

░░░█░░░░░░░░░░░░░░█ ░░█░░░░░░░▄░░░░░░░░█ ░█░░░(◐)░░▄█▄░░(◐)░░░░█ ░░▀█▄▄▄▄█▀░▀█▄▄▄▄▄█▀ ░░░░░░░░░░░▌░░░░▄███████▄ ░░░░░░░░░░▐░░░░▐███████████▄ ░░░le░░░░░░▐░░░░▐█████████████▄ ░░boobhead░░░░▀▄░░░▐██████████████▄ ░░░░has░░░░░░░▀▄▄████████████████▄ ░░░arrived░░░░░░░░░░░█▀██████
July 2017

Classic

Are ya winning, son?

⢸⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⡷⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠢⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠈⠑⢦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠖⠒⠒⠒⢤⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢸⠀⠀⣀⢤⣼⣀⡠⠤⠤⠼⠤⡄⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢸⠀⠀⠑⡤⠤⡒⠒⠒⡊⠙⡏⠀⢀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⠢⡄⠀ ⢸⠀⠀⠀⠇⠀⣀⣀⣀⣀⢀⠧⠟⠁⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀ ⢸⠀⠀⠀⠸⣀⠀⠀⠈⢉⠟⠓⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸ ⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢱⡖⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸ ⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⢺⠧⢄⣀⠀⠀⣀⣀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸ ⢸⠀⠀⠀⣠⠃⢸⠀⠀⠈⠉⡽⠿⠯⡆⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸ ⢸⠀⠀⣰⠁⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠉⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸ ⢸⠀⠀⠣⠀⠀⢸⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸ ⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⢇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸ ⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡌⠀⠈⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸ ⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠃⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸ ⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠷
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