[Copypasta] Joe Biden eat hot chip and lie

twitchquotes: He lets out a sigh and then a plastic smile. “Under the Biden administration,” he says, carefully “There will be a few new rules. It will be forbidden to cook,” The crowd gasps. “Everyone will have to eat McDonalds,” Jill hangs her head in shame. “You may have to charge your phone. You may have to twerk. Hell, you may even have to be bisexual.” An uproar starts in the crowd, but Biden ushers a silence with his next words “But it will all be worth it when we as a people can eat hot chip and lie. Thank you.” Biden leaves the podium to a thunderous applause. America is saved.
twitch chat
November 2020
I used to be a real ad
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Hello Kripp, this is your mother

twitchquotes: Hello kripp. This is your mother, I saw that "brofist" you just gave to one of your subscribers. Don't make me come to Athens and make you give him a better brofist. Haven't I taught you better fisting? Love always, mum
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⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⣿⣿⠻⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣻⠛⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⣡⣤⣬⣿⣿⣛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠷⠂⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡿⢃⣾⣿⣍⣴⡆⠄⢠⣍⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⢡⡀⠄⠠⠄⠄⠈⢻⣿ ⣿⡿⠉⠐⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠓⠄⠠⣶⣶⣶⣿⠇⢸⣿ ⡿⠄⠠⣤⣽⣿⣿⣍⣠⣤⣤⣭⣬⣭⣿⣿⣯⣤⣄⡀⠄⣀⡀⣠⣭⡤⠄⣸⣿ ⡇⠄⠄⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⡜⢋⣼⣿⠟⠄⣰⣿⣿ ⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠙⠛⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢟⣿⣿⡿⠟⠉⠄⠄⠙⢿⣿ ⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢹
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twitchquotes: ☑ “This guy's DDOS is CRAZY!” ☑ “My ISP can't win against a DDOS like that” ☑ "He NEEDED precisely this IP to win" ☑ “He used the only DDOS site the that could beat me” ☑ "He had the perfect program” ☑ “There was nothing I could do” ☑ “I streamed that perfectly"!!!
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This Copypasta Is CRAZY!

Hi Kripp, Google again here

twitchquotes: Kripp, Google again here. We've noticed that you've been away from Twitch for at least 2 minutes in the past. We're just wondering if everything is okay. Is it still the merchandise? We're serious about raising the price if it's a problem to you. We just want you to have fun, and to of course buy more Twitch merchandise. Our Viewbots are ready to bring you (mostly us) much ad revenue. Thank you Kripp, hope to see you soon
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乇乂ㄒ尺卂 丂山口乚口

twitchquotes: In japan we don't say 'I love Star Wars' we say 乇乂ㄒ尺卂 丂山口乚口 which doesn't mean anything it just spells out 'I wanna fuck Ben Swolo' in japanese symbols.
twitch chat
January 2018
Text-to-Speech Playing