[Copypasta] Joe Biden eat hot chip and lie

twitchquotes: He lets out a sigh and then a plastic smile. “Under the Biden administration,” he says, carefully “There will be a few new rules. It will be forbidden to cook,” The crowd gasps. “Everyone will have to eat McDonalds,” Jill hangs her head in shame. “You may have to charge your phone. You may have to twerk. Hell, you may even have to be bisexual.” An uproar starts in the crowd, but Biden ushers a silence with his next words “But it will all be worth it when we as a people can eat hot chip and lie. Thank you.” Biden leaves the podium to a thunderous applause. America is saved.
twitch chat
November 2020
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Chibi Vayne

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September 2021

League of Legends

Kappa Nazi

░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░ ░░░░▄▀▀▀▀▀█▀▄▄▄▄░░░░ ░░▄▀▒▓▒▓▓▒▓▒▒▓▒▓▓▓▓░ ▄▀▒▒▓▒▓▒▒▓▒█▒█▓▒▒██░ █▓▒▓▒▓▒██▓█░█▀▀░███░ █▓▓███▒▓▒░▀▀█▀█▒▒██░ ████▓▒░░░░▀▀▀░▀░▒▒█░ ████░░░▄▄▄██░░███▄▓░ ░▀▄█░░░▀███▓░▓███▓▒░ ▀▄░░░░░░░░░░░░▀▓▒▒█░ ░▀░▀░░░▒░░▓▀▄▄▄▓▒▓█░ ░░▀░░░░░▓▓░░░▓█▓▓▓█░ ░░░▀▄▄▒▒░░▀▀███▀▒█▀░ ░░░░░▀██▒▒░░░░▓██░░░ ░░░░░░░░▀▀█▄▄▄▄▀░
November 2014

PC vs console youtube comment

Says the poor brainless console peasant. No mods, no money to achieve high performance, no creativity to set up your own devices. Calling me pathetic lol, I actually work and gather money for Gaming PC whilst you console peasants probably beg to your parents for buying you a console. So tell me, have you been a good brat by doing house chores?
June 2021

Slap Chop commercial script

Now that I have your attention let me show you this handy new kitchen tool, the Slap Chop! You’re going to be in a great mood all day, because you’re going be slapping your troubles away with the Slap Chop. Now, look here’s a potato. One slap you got big chunks for stew, two slaps home fries in a second. And, look at this when you add a mushroom: the more you do it, the finer it gets you don’t have to switch any blades. Now, you love salad -- you hate making it. You know you hate making salads -- that’s why you don’t have any salad in your diet. Watch this one slap... salad! I love Pizza too, but once in a while get the veggies in, at least throw it on top of the pizza. You’re going to change your eating habits. Soup, Coleslaw, stuff we want, 5 seconds. 4 or 5 seconds, it's done. This thing, this tuna looks boring. Stop having a boring tuna, stop having a boring life. Add this tuna putting it in like this now you’re going to have a nice, tuna, salad. Look at this you’re going to have an exciting life now. Look here’s a hard boiled egg. One chop, you add the pickle; you add the green onion. And what you can do is mix things together add the ham and you’re going to love this. You don’t have time to make breakfast, breakfast to go. You’re going to love my nuts. Watch this: almonds, walnuts. Comes with a cover so you can do everything in the cover. Alright, or you can do it on the board, whatever you like. So easy, one finger, if I can do it with one finger you guys can do it with your whole hand. Kids can do it. You know what they charge at the ice cream store? A dollar for toppings at the ice cream store. Add a couple cookies if you want. So, you can make it for 10 cents. Stop throwing your money away. You know not only nuts what about fruit? Put a mango, look at that isn’t that beautiful on your ice cream.
December 2020

Only the chosen one can fist both asses

twitchquotes: (‿ˠ‿) _(‿ˠ‿) only the chosen one can fist both asses. ⎝ Kreygasm
twitch chat
June 2016
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