[Copypasta] Shit and cum at the same time (from /r/nofap)

Okay I just had the weirdest thing happen to me on my day 2 of no fap, I was taking a shit and struggling to push it out and simultaneously I kid you not I randomly ejaculate as I push my shit out, I’m just sitting there dumbfounded as to why the fuck this happened, there was no pleasure to my shit, nothing strange I wasn’t fapping I swear to god I just randomly….. ejaculated while shitting. WHAT THE FUCK? Anyways mission failed life really hates me lmao
September 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Fast forward computer time to open TGT packs

twitchquotes: 4Head fast forward computer time 4Head to August 26 2015 so you can open TGT packs 4Head everyone copy pasta this so reynad can see 4Head
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August 2015
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Pokemon Marathon Season 1 intermission

twitchquotes: ResidentSleeper CATERPIE ResidentSleeper THAT GIRL ResidentSleeper I KNOW I KNOW ResidentSleeper IM STUPID ResidentSleeper DUPLICA ResidentSleeper DONUT ResidentSleeper NOT YOU PSYDUCK ResidentSleeper PITY BADGE ResidentSleeper
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August 2018

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Intelligest response to "Who asked?"

What if somebody did ask, huh, what then? I'm sure they were quite satisfied with the answer. But you, no, you cannot for the life of you find a way to somehow think about what someone else thinks or feels. When you imply that nobody asked, you're talking solely about yourself. The world doesn't revolve around you. Try to find the simple joys of life instead of wasting perhaps the best years of your life away, sitting in your shit smeared, cheeto dust covered, cum bespeckled ergonomic office chair. Maybe start working out, think about somebody other than you, secure yourself a date, anything will work, so long as you get the fuck outside and stop asking "who asked" every 2 fucking minutes, because quite frankly nobody asked for your opinion as well. You're but a speck of extra stinky shit in a pile of manure, that's all the significance you have in this world, but you can change that with 4 simple words: Shutting the fuck up. Thank you and have a good day
November 2021

Who Asked?

Hey subs, thanks for paying for my free entertainment

twitchquotes: ( ° ͜ʖ͡°)╭∩╮Hey subs, thanks for paying for my free entertainment ( ° ͜ʖ͡°)╭∩╮
twitch chat
May 2017

plebs vs subs

RIOT RIOT RIOT

twitchquotes: ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ RIOT ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ RIOT ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ RIOT ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ RIOT ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ RIOT ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ
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December 2014
Forsen
Text-to-Speech Playing