[Copypasta] I just lost my virginity and said Poggers

I just lost my virginity and said Poggers Ok so we were flirting and he took of his pants and started to rub his bulge then he pulls his dick out, I dead ass said “ that’s pretty pog” he then broke up with me after we were done 💀
July 2021
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

I've always been a DC fan

twitchquotes: (sponsored spam) I've always been a DC fan (I guess you could say Fanboy LOL) but after watching Kripparrian play Marvel Future Fight, I gotta say, I'm HOOKED! Featuring iconic characters like Black Panther and Thanos, I gotta say, I'm pretty damn interested in this game. Thank you Kripparrian!
twitch chat
June 2017
Kripp

sellout

Natalie Portman is the reason I work out

Natalie Portman is the reason I work out. I have this fantasy where we start talking at the Vanity Fair Oscars party bar. We exchange a few pleasantries. She asks what I do. I say I loved her in New Girl. She laughs. I get my drink. "Well, see ya," I say and walk away. I've got her attention now. How many guys voluntarily leave a conversation with Natalie Portman? She touches her neck as she watches me leave. Later, as the night's dragged on and the coterie of gorgeous narcissists grows increasingly loose, she finds me on the balcony, my bowtie undone, smoking a cigarette. "Got a spare?" she asks. "What's in it for me?" I say as I hand her one of my little white ladies. She smiles. "Conversation with me, duh." I laugh. "What's so funny?" she protests. "Nothing, nothing... It's just... don't you grow tired of the egos?" "You get used to it," she says, lighting her cigarette and handing me back the lighter. "What would you do if you weren't an actress?" I ask. "Teaching, I think." "And if I was your student, what would I be learning?" "Discipline," she says quickly, looking up into my eyes, before changing the subject. "Where are you from?" "Bermuda," I say. "Oh wow. That's lovely." "It's ok," I admit. "Not everything is to my liking." "What could possibly be not to your liking in Bermuda?" she inquires. "I don't like sand," I tell her. "It's coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere."
January 2021

Classic

Creepy NaM smile

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⣉⡉⠄⠄⠈⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⣉⢭⣙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⣠⣶⡿⠟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⢿⣿⡳⡻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡿⢣⣾⣿⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣤⣤⣤⣀⠄⠙⠻⣞⣞⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⢡⣿⡿⠃⠄⠄⢀⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡄⠄⠙⣞⠼⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡇⢼⣿⠄⠄⠄⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠄⠻⡀⢻⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡇⣸⡿⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⠛⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠸⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠃⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⡀⠄⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣀⠄⢀⣾⣿⡇⠄⢠⠄⠄⣹⣿ ⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠈⠄⢰⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠈⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣧⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢿⣿⠟⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠻⣿⠄⣠⣄⠄⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣀⣀⡀⢸⣿⣦⡀⣤⣉⡛⠛⠛⡛⠛⠉⠠⠐⢰⣿⢠⣿⣿⠄⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣞⣿⣿⣷⣄⠛⠁⢹⢗⡿⢉⠁⠄⣠⣿⣣⣿⣿⡟⢠⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣼⣬⣧⣥⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
March 2019

When you copy messages don't copy the name

twitchquotes: Jimmy_Swaggart: ForsenIsNeverLucky: FailFish DONT COPY THE FailFish NAME WHEN YOU FailFish COPY THE PASTA FailFish
twitch chat
May 2015

Classic

Google employees complaints

Reading Google employees complaints about workplace is like watching Becky cry on social media how her life's ruined when she only got a new Hyundai for graduation instead of the audi she asked. Bitch give me that 300k job and I will deal with "my voice not being heard" all day every day.
January 2021

WallStreetBets

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