[Copypasta] You. Me. Gas station

You. Me. Gas station. What are we getting for dinner? Sushi of course. Uh oh! There was a roofie in our gas station sushi. We black out and wake up in a sewer surrounded by fish. Horny fish. You know what that means. Fish orgy. The stench draws in a bear. What do we do? We're gonna fight it. Bear fight. Bare handed. Bare, naked? Oh, yes please. We befriend the bear after we beat it in a brawl and ride it into a Chuck E. Cheese. Dance Dance Revolution. Revolution? Overthrow the government? Uh, I think so. Next thing you know, I'm reincarnated as Jesus Christ. Then I turn into a jet, fly into the sun, black out again, wake up, do a bump, white out, which I didn't even know you could do. Then I smoked a joint, greened out. Then I turn into the sun. Uh oh! Looks like the meth is kicking in. aklfhaofhasfahfakh AAAAAAAAA afahfioahflkf AAAAA
June 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Christian Father is concerned with Fortnite

twitchquotes: Hello everyone, concerned Christian father here. Recently, my 11 year old son downloaded the video game "Fortnite" after playing it at a friend's house. While I didn't mind at first, it soon began to affect his character. Within a week, he had taken up hard drugs and smoking. When asked to do his homework, he called me a "default" and did a strange dance. His grades have been dropping heavily ever since that day and now he's threatening me with violence. Yesterday I entered his room to see him smoking a cigar and playing extremely loud rave (sinner) music, he has dyed his hair blue and neow refuses to go to Bible Study unless we "take the battle bus". I don't know what that is but he refuses to take any form of transport except that. Please I am so concerned, what do I do?
twitch chat
January 2019

Fortnite

my friend is intellectually inferior for me for being christian

Ok, so today I was talking to my friend over text. I asked him what's his favorite anime but then he told me that he doesn't watch it and thinks it's boring. I was confused as to why he didn't watch anime. I told him about how much I like to watch anime "for the plot" but he didn't really show much interest. I then asked him if we could play Among Us later but then he said he has to go to church this afternoon. I never knew he was a Christian. I was asking him why he believed in God and he didn't reply so I told him he's intellectually inferior to me and that his parents indoctrinated him into believing in God. I was sending him scientific studies that show proof that atheists are more intellectually superior to people who believe in religion. I later found out that he was attending a funeral at the church.
December 2020

Peter Griffin Brian Griffin face swap

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣤⠤⠤⣤⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡠⠚⢳⠖⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠱⠖⠉⠳⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⡸⠁⠀⠈⣠⠤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⡀⠀⢠⠀⠀⠸⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⢀⡜⠀⣤⠀⢱⠤⢤⡎⠁⡀⠈⣦⢼⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠲⡾⠻⣄⣀⡴⠚⠃⠀⢧⡀⠁⣀⠏⠘⠦⢴⡞⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠎⠀⠀⢀⠉⢧⣀⣀⣠⠇⠉⠉⣅⠀⠀⠀⠈⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⡎⠀⠀⢠⡋⠓⠒⠶⠶⠒⠒⠚⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠰⡇⠀⠀⠀⢱⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡼⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢇⠀⠀⡔⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢆⠘⣇⠀⠀⢀⣄⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡗⠎⠙⠋⠁⠈⠓⠲⠒⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣷⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣠⣴⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣀⠴⠊⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠈⠳⢄⠀⠀⠀ ⢀⡞⠁⠀⡀⡄⠀⠈⠙⡟⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠛⠋⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⢄⠀⠀
March 2022

This is the shittiest reply ever

twitchquotes: This is the shittiest reply ever. Fortnite requires movement, editing, building, rotating, and hitting shots. There are not “positions” in Fortnite. A kickers job is LITERALLY to kick. Horrible analogy, kind of embarrassing.
twitch chat
December 2019

Fortnite

THANK MR SKELTAL

twitchquotes: THANK MR SKELTAL💀🎺💀🎺💀🎺💀🎺💀🎺 gooD boNes n calcium💀 thank 🎺 mr skeltal g💀💀ood bones💀💀and calc💀 ium💀💀💀 good bones🎺and calcium 🎺🎺if i dootƽaү thank skeltal man 🎶 doot doot doot doot🎶 good bones n calcium good bones (chorus: dootdoot) mMMMMᎷМ🎶 💀💀💀DO0ОଠOOOOOОଠଠOoooᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒT💀 💀 💀💀 🎶 💀 🎺 🎺 🎺 💀💀thank mr skeltal
twitch chat
March 2016
Text-to-Speech Playing