[Copypasta] You. Me. Gas station

You. Me. Gas station. What are we getting for dinner? Sushi of course. Uh oh! There was a roofie in our gas station sushi. We black out and wake up in a sewer surrounded by fish. Horny fish. You know what that means. Fish orgy. The stench draws in a bear. What do we do? We're gonna fight it. Bear fight. Bare handed. Bare, naked? Oh, yes please. We befriend the bear after we beat it in a brawl and ride it into a Chuck E. Cheese. Dance Dance Revolution. Revolution? Overthrow the government? Uh, I think so. Next thing you know, I'm reincarnated as Jesus Christ. Then I turn into a jet, fly into the sun, black out again, wake up, do a bump, white out, which I didn't even know you could do. Then I smoked a joint, greened out. Then I turn into the sun. Uh oh! Looks like the meth is kicking in. aklfhaofhasfahfakh AAAAAAAAA afahfioahflkf AAAAA
June 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Kripp, Blizzard here again

twitchquotes: Kripp, Blizzard here again. We've noticed that you've been away from Hearthstone for at least 2 hours. We're just wondering if everything is okay. Is it still mages? We're serious about nerfing them if it's a problem to you. Our Viewbots are ready to bring you much ad revenue. Thank you Kripp, hope to see you soon!
twitch chat
April 2015
Kripp

Viewbots

Hearthstone

Four Asians streamed together in harmony...

twitchquotes: (`.ยด) Trump. (`.ยด) Amaz. (`.ยด) MaSsan. (`.ยด) Hafu. A few months ago the four Asians streamed together in harmony. Then, everything changed when ( อยฐ อœส–อกยฐ) Forsen's Snus Brotherhood attacked. Only (โ—‰ู„อŸโ—‰) Reynad, master of the Salt could stop them, but when Twitch needed him most - he was too busy complaining on stream. ( อ ยฐู„อŸ อ ยฐ)
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

I was only 14 years old I loved xQc so much

I was only 14 years old I loved xQc so much, I had all the merchandise and VODS. I pray to xQc every night, thanking him for the life I've been given. "xQc is love" I say "xQc is life" My dad hears me and calls me a Juicer. I knew he was jealous of my devotion to xQc. I called him baj He hits me and sends me to sleep I'm crying now and my face hurts. I lay in bed, really cold. I feel something warm... Its xQc! I was so happy. He whispers in my ear "This is my jungle" He grabs me with his hands, and puts me on my hands and knees. I'm ready. I spread my ass cheeks for xQc. He penetrates my butthole. It hurts so much, but I do it for xQc. I can feel my butt tearing and eyes watering. I want to please xQc. He roars a mighty roar as he fills my butt with the juice. My dad walks in. xQc looks him straight in the eye and says, He got the Juice now. xQc leaves through my window. xQc is love. xQc is life.
January 2022
xQcOW

YOU'VE BEEN VISITED BY THE FEELS GOOD MAN

twitchquotes: FeelsGoodMan YOU'VE BEEN VISITED BY THE FEELS GOOD MAN FeelsGoodMan LOVE, HAPPINESS, AND SELF WORTH CAN ALL BE YOURS FeelsGoodMan BUT ONLY IF YOU COPY PASTE THIS MESSAGE THREE TIMES <3 FeelsGoodMan
twitch chat
June 2016
Kripp

Niga Higa Bromance song lyrics

๐ŸŒˆ BROMANCE ๐Ÿ‘Š nothing really gay ๐Ÿฅต about it ๐Ÿ’ฏ not that there's ๐Ÿ‘Œ anything wrong with being KappaPride gay ๐ŸŒˆ BROMANCE ๐Ÿ‘Š shouldn't be ashamed ๐Ÿ‘€ or hide it ๐Ÿ‘ค I love you ๐Ÿ˜ in the most heterosexual way ๐Ÿ† ๐Ÿ’ฆ
February 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing