Help me gumpy I fucked up. I was jerking off to my Sylveon plushie and decided to put it in the microwave but I left it in too long and burned the jizz and the plushie. Now the whole house fucking stinks and when my parents come home tomorrow from vacation they are going to know I microwaved my jizz again. Last time this happened I had to go to counseling and I gained like 50 lbs. I really don't want to go back on medicine. How the fuck do I get rid of the smell it is in the carpets and sofa. It smells like burned hair and plastic.
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we don't operate on empty jars of spaghetti sauce
gf is prego
we like to get kinky anyways
one night things get particularly saucy
i'm sticking my noodle in her when I notice weird fucking chunks coming out, so I turn on the lights
wtf it's red everywhere and she's obviously not on her period
i look up at her, she's got a glassy, jarred look on her face and she's not answering
ohshitohshitohshitohshit
i rush her into my car and speed all the way to the hospital
she's still bleeding everywhere
by the time we get there, she's not bleeding much anymore, but all the color has drained and she looks colorless and almost transparent
oh shit, she looks like she's in a vegetative state
storm into to the emergency room, cary her to the nearest doctor and explain eveything
he takes one look at ther and says
"sir, i'm sorry, there's nothing we can do"
"WHY THE FUCK NOT???"
"we don't operate on empty jars of spaghetti sauce"
Classic
My name is Dennis Pasterino
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Kripp
Well you see, the question of "who asked?" is simply a paradox
Well you see, the question of "who asked?" is simply a paradox. Because by asking "who asked?", you are implying that people need to be asked before speaking. But following that logic, you would have needed to have someone grant you permission to say that, because who asked you to say "who asked?"? Exactly, nobody did, and nobody can ask anyone to give them permission to give you permission because no one asked them. And this perpetual loop never ends, creating a paradox. So by you saying "who asked?", you admit that you are a stupid fucking retard, and I fucked your mom bitch.
xqcJuice
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⠀⢀⣾⣿⣿⡟⠉⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠉⠙⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠛⠛⠛⠙⠛⠉⠁⠀
⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠶⠾⠿⠶⠾⠷⠖⠒⠚⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡷⠄⣴⠒⠶⠶⢾⣿⣶
⣴⣿⣿⣿⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡶⠂⠀⠀⢹⣿⣿⣿⠋⠃⢾⠃⠀⠀⡦⠀⣹⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⣦⣴⣾⢇⣀⣠⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣤⣼⣷⣶⣶⣿⣿⠟⠃
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⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀
⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣩⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀
⡀⣺⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⢰⣶⣶⣶⣶⠙⡛⠛⠀
⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⡶⠶⠌⠛⠃⢋⠀⠀
⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⣛⠋⢠⣤⡀⠲⣾⣿⡿⠃⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠙⠛⠃⠈⠛⠛⠛⠛⠻⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡌⣿⣿⣦⣄⠙⠁⣔⣴⣿
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣾⣿⣿⣿
xQcOW
What is copypasta?
twitchquotes:
ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ Copypasta is internet slang for any block of text that gets copied and pasted over and over again, typically disseminated by individuals through online discussion forums and social networking sites. It shares some characteristics with spam in the sense they’re both unsolicited (and often considered a nuisance) ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ
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