Help me gumpy I fucked up. I was jerking off to my Sylveon plushie and decided to put it in the microwave but I left it in too long and burned the jizz and the plushie. Now the whole house fucking stinks and when my parents come home tomorrow from vacation they are going to know I microwaved my jizz again. Last time this happened I had to go to counseling and I gained like 50 lbs. I really don't want to go back on medicine. How the fuck do I get rid of the smell it is in the carpets and sofa. It smells like burned hair and plastic.
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas
Eminem Stan lyrics
twitchquotes:
Dear kripp, I wrote you but still ain't callin' I left my cell, my pager, and my home phone at the bottom I sent two letters back in autumn, you must not-a got 'em There probably was a problem at the post office or somethin' Sometimes I scribble addresses too sloppy when I jot 'em But anyways, fuck it, what's been up? Man how's dexter? My girlfriend's pregnant too, I'm 'bout to be a father. My girlfriend's jealous 'cause I talk about you 24/7 But she don't know you like I know you kripp, no one does She don't know what it was like for people like us growin' up, you gotta call me man I'll be the biggest fan you'll ever lose Sincerely yours, Stan P.S. we should be together too
twitch chat
Kripp
Maya's mod responds to Miz and Maya break up
I wish I could say I didn't see this coming but...sigh..I definitely did. To many people not in the loop it may have come as a shock. They certainly LOOKED like a happy couple, but when you've been a twitch mod for as long as I have...you notice certain things. As Maya's head mod and commandant in charge of holding off weirdos I could tell very clearly that something was up.
The way she acted on stream, her general atmosphere, twas as if a beautiful chrysanthemum was being oppressed by a violent and balding Gardner. Someone who had not the faintest idea how to look after beautiful flowers.
But the time has come, the thorns and nature hath come to wreak havok. At the moment a plan is being drafted by me and the sub mods to find her a new boyfriend who is fit to properly look after her. Naturally I will be taking the temporary (and maybe permanent if all goes to plan 😉) role of boyfriend/guardian.
But while I reveal my plans and provide you all a mere glimpse at the machinations set in motion by this breakup I must warn you...
BACK OFF...
This is not your fight, you have no idea who you are dealing with. If you come after her now without going through the necessary protocols then I won't be able to control myself. There is a reason I would never show myself on stream or play among us. There is a side to the top twitch dog that you don't wanna know about. These fangs are here for a reason, don't. Make me. Use them.
Maya
Simps
Fancy Schmancy F
TriHard v2
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠟⠟⠉⠉⠉⠉⠛⠛⠉⠻⠿⠻⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇
⣿⣿⣿⡿⠇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠹⢿⣿⣿⡇
⣿⣿⠏⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠹⣿⡇
⠟⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢻⡇
⣷⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣀⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠇
⡏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣦⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠃
⣇⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣺⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡀
⣿⣿⣤⣤⡄⠄⠄⣠⣬⣼⣯⣟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⠄⢀⣾⡇
⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⣿⣯⣔⣆⣠⣍⣿⣿⣿⡿⣛⡉⡐⠄⣀⣤⣾⣿⡇
⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢤⣿⣀⣁⡄⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇
⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠈⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⣿⣿⣿⣆⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠄⠄⡀⢋⢩⣙⣛⣿⣿⡟⠉⠋⠛⠛⢋⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠄⠄⢼⣧⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡥⡠⢒⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠅⢡⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡈⣿⣿⣯⣭⣭⣡⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣉⣉⣛⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇
No one RIOTS on my watch
twitchquotes:
̿ ̿'̿'̵з=༼ ▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿ ༽=ε/̵/’̿’̿ ̿ ̿[} ̿ ̿ ̿ ̿^ Stop right there criminal scum! no one RIOTs on my watch. I'm confiscating your goods. now pay your fine, or it's off to jail. ̿ ̿ ̿ ̿'̿'̵з=༼ ▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿ ༽ YOU'RE UNDER ARREST FOR BEING CASUAL. COME OUT WITH YOUR DONGERS RAISED ̿ ̿ ̿ ̿'̿'̵з=༼ ▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿ ༽
twitch chat
Trick2g