[Copypasta] I microwaved my jizz again.

Help me gumpy I fucked up. I was jerking off to my Sylveon plushie and decided to put it in the microwave but I left it in too long and burned the jizz and the plushie. Now the whole house fucking stinks and when my parents come home tomorrow from vacation they are going to know I microwaved my jizz again. Last time this happened I had to go to counseling and I gained like 50 lbs. I really don't want to go back on medicine. How the fuck do I get rid of the smell it is in the carpets and sofa. It smells like burned hair and plastic.
June 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

To protect the chat from moderation

twitchquotes: To protect the chat from moderation. To unite all spammers within our nation. To denounce the evil of bans and mods. To extend our spam to the lines above. Copy! Paste! Twitch Chat scroll at the speed of light! Surrender mods or prepare to fight! That's right!!!
twitch chat
May 2019

Pokemon Marathon 2018

Hello Forsen, I am a 32 year old Ecuadorian national

twitchquotes: Hello Forsen I am a 32 year old Ecuadorian national who is stuck in the US after Reynad refused to pay my airfare home. I need you and your stream to please help me get home to my wife and kid it has been 1 year since my departure and I very much would like to see them again. Kappa
twitch chat
November 2014
Forsen

Twin Towers

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April 2018

Jacked Impostor

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠯⠀⡖⠒⠒⠠⠤⣄⡀⠀⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣷⣶⡆⣶⣶⣿⡏⣦⢁⣄⢿⣿⢰⣶⣶⡌⣿⡏⢰⣶⣦⡄⢠⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠑⢳⣦⣽⣿⢱⣶⣶⡌⣿⡇⢰⣶⣶⠈⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⣿⣿⣿⠀⣿⢸⣿⢸⣿⠸⠿⠿⢃⣿⡇⢸⣿⣇⠂⠈⠑⠒⠦⠤⣀⡀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⡇⣿⡇⠈⢩⣭⣼⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣟⣛⣃⣛⠛⣿⣅⣿⢸⣿⢸⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡘⣛⠀⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⢀⣶⣸⣿⣿⣿⣜⣛⣛⣡⣿⣇⣸⣷⣍⡻⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠁⠁⠱⣤⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⣻⠟⢁⡇⠂⠀⠀⢻⣷⣤⣄⣀⣀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⣠⢧⠀⢐⡀⠀⡿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠃⣟⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⢉⡍⠀⠈⣽⣿⣿⣿⠒⠛⠉⠀⢳⢼⡇⠀⣇⣈⡍⢉⣄⢼⣥⡀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠀⠉⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠳⠿⠿⠒⠋⠁⠀⠉⠉⠉⣿⣿⣿⡛⠛⠻⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣨⣤⣄⡠⠆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣤⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢈⠉⠛⠃⠀⠀⠙⡀⠉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⠀⠀⠀⢀⣶⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢄⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⡟⣀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣷⣦⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⢽⠃⠀⠓⠄⣰⣿⡍⢿⣿⣿⣦⣄⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣝⢿⣆⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡿⢼⠀⡄⠀⢀⣿⠿⡃⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣄⣀⣀⣀⣴⠳⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣠⣶⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⠛⠻⡻⣄⠀⢸⡉⢻⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣇⢸⡆⠇⠀⡞⠁⡕⠀⠀⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢿⡿⠛⠉⠉⠁⠈⣶⠉⠛⠛⠲⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠘⢜⡢⠀⠛⢸⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠸⠇⠀⡄⠀⠘⠅⠀⠀⠀⠹⣿⣿⠿⣿⣄⣠⣤⡄⠀⠐⠛⠛⣿⣟⠓⠀⠀⡀⣤⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡱⠀⠀⢺⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡆⠀⠀⠙⣄⡎⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⡻⠀⠀⢹⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⡟⢡⢿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢱⡀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⣿⣶⣤⣤⡙⢿⣧⠐⠦⣬⣄⣀⡀⠠⠶⠒⠛⣿⠟⠁⠀⠰⢦⣿⠗⠃⣰⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⡤⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⡿⢿⣿⣿⡌⠏⣷⣤⣨⣿⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣧⣾⠃⣿⣿⣿⣧⡀⣠⣼⣿⡿⠁⠀⠀⢀⣿⣿ ⣿⡏⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣞⠐⠈⠻⣿⣿⣤⣀⠤⠤⠤⢿⠿⠆⠠⠶⢶⣿⡟⠀⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀⠀⢠⣾⣿⣿ ⣿⡇⣿⣯⠿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣯⣯⡀⠀⠸⣿⡍⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⠇⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⠀⠀⢰⣿⣿⡿⣿ ⣿⣧⣿⡿⡇⠙⢄⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⡞⣷⡀⠀⢸⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⠄⠀⠀⣼⠟⠘⢰⣿ ⣿⣿⣾⣷⠀⠀⠀⠱⣄⡈⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⣦⡈⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⠀⣼⠟⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢐⠀⡰⠁⠀⠀⣼⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠹⡇⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠀⠀⠈⣷⢻⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡟⠀⡏⠀⠀⠘⢿⣿⣿⣿⣷⢸⡼⠁⠀⠀⣠⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣷⣻⣷⣀⣀⣀⣃⣀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣃⣴⣎⣀⣙⣄⣻⣿⣄⣀⣀⣀⣀⣰⠄⣺⣁⣸⣇⣀⣰⣶⣈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣹⣇⣀⣀⣰⣿⣿⣿
March 2021

Among Us / Amogus

Just hit gold and I feel really dangerous IRL

twitchquotes: Last night I hit Gold rank in League of Legends, Summoner's Rift for the first time. Today, when I went on my walk to my standard retail job, idk I felt like I had this new edge to me that wasn't there before. I went from a triangle to a square pretty much. Have any other LoL overachievers ever felt this way before? It's like my rank is strapped to my waist and now whenever people are at risk of passing me on the sidewalk, they skirt over to the other side in a tizzy. At work, someone tried to shoplift some Almond Joy. When I caught him, I yelled "hey!" And he looked at me and scoffed, like, "whatever dude, don't be a hero." I put a hand on my hip and said "I'm not a hero, I'm a jungler." He dropped the candy bar and ran to his getaway vehicle. I recorded the plate and called the police.
twitch chat
January 2020

League of Legends

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