[Copypasta] I microwaved my jizz again.

Help me gumpy I fucked up. I was jerking off to my Sylveon plushie and decided to put it in the microwave but I left it in too long and burned the jizz and the plushie. Now the whole house fucking stinks and when my parents come home tomorrow from vacation they are going to know I microwaved my jizz again. Last time this happened I had to go to counseling and I gained like 50 lbs. I really don't want to go back on medicine. How the fuck do I get rid of the smell it is in the carpets and sofa. It smells like burned hair and plastic.
June 2021
I used to be a real ad
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Sesame Street Celebrity Recruitment Department

twitchquotes: Hello Kripparian. Its Becky from the Sesame Street Celebrity Recruitment Department. Although "E-Sports" has indeed become mainstream, we unfortunately have declined your application to be on an episode of Sesame Street. We have already filmed the episode where "K" is the letter of the day. Thank you for your interest.
twitch chat
October 2015
Kripp

Amazed Face

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„ โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„ โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€
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August 2018

Michael Santano, you are a big SELLOUT

twitchquotes: Hello Micheal Santano,this is President Obama,just wanted to tell you,you are a big S E L L O U T,I used to raise my donger to you sir but no longer,do not copy this post or I will NSA your butt.
twitch chat
October 2014
imaqtpie

That seals the deal. I am no longer a US citizen

twitchquotes: That seals the deal. I am no longer a US citizen. I have been a citizen since 1776 and a voter since 1804. I will not be voting again nor will I be around to see this country fall apart. Iโ€™m taking my talents to Somalia where it looks like they know how to run a real country.
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November 2020

2020 US Election

Sadge brother letter

twitchquotes: ๐Ÿ“œ โœ๏ธ Sadge ๐“œ๐”‚ ๐“ญ๐“ฎ๐“ช๐“ป๐“ฎ๐“ผ๐“ฝ ๐“ซ๐“ป๐“ธ๐“ฝ๐“ฑ๐“ฎ๐“ป, ๐“˜ ๐”€๐“ป๐“ฒ๐“ฝ๐“ฎ ๐”‚๐“ธ๐“พ ๐“ฒ๐“ท ๐“ญ๐“ฎ๐“ฎ๐“น ๐“ถ๐“ฎ๐“ต๐“ช๐“ท๐“ฌ๐“ฑ๐“ธ๐“ต๐”‚. ๐“˜๐“ฝ ๐“ช๐“น๐“น๐“ฎ๐“ช๐“ป๐“ผ ๐“ฝ๐“ธ ๐“ถ๐“ฎ ๐“ฝ๐“ฑ๐“ช๐“ฝ ๐“ฝ๐“ฑ๐“ฎ๐“ป๐“ฎ ๐“ฒ๐“ผ๐“ท'๐“ฝ ๐“ช๐“ท๐”‚ ๐“ฌ๐“ธ๐“ฌ๐“ด ๐“ต๐“ฎ๐“ฏ๐“ฝ
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August 2020
Forsen
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