[Copypasta] So you call these things "chips"?

So you call these things "chips"? Instead of crispity crunchy munchie crackerjack snacker nibbler snap crack n pop westpoolchestershireshire queen's lovely jubily delights? That’s rather bit cringe, innit bruv
December 2020
I used to be a real ad
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Christmas for a wsb trader

As the tree blinks from white to red to green, you look at the void under the tree that previously held presents. Fewer this year than usual, but some. How did you get here? Boredom? In March, you felt trapped with your wife and infant. You needed something to pass the time. Something you could throw yourself into fully. β€œAre you coming to bed?” your wife yells down the stairs. It seemed harmless at first, but as the pandemic drew on, so did your investment. You’ll stop soon, though. β€œSoon!” you reply, and you hear her feet climb the steps. The lights start to blink chaotically. You cringe because you could only afford the junk strands at CVS. Suddenly they haltβ€”the alternation feature brokenβ€”on red. The red fills the room and covers your flesh. You look down at your hands, and they look like they’re bleeding. Like your calls. After a timeβ€”hours?β€”you realize you’re sitting in complete darkness. Your lights have expired, worthless.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Mindless spam

twitchquotes: Mindless spam.Spam is a brand of several canned precooked meat products made by the Hormel Foods Corporation. Is mindless spam therefore precooked meat products with the brain left out? Or maybe it's the repetitive commenting withought the use of any cerebral capacity? YOU be the judge
twitch chat
December 2014
Forsen

Donger

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–Œ β–’β–€β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–€β–€β–„β–„β–β–Œβ–’β–‘β–‘β–’β–€β–’β–„β–’β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–Œ β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–’β–‘β–‘β–“β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–β–ˆβ–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–’β–‘β–β–Œβ–ˆβ–Œβ–β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–β–Œβ–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–€β–‘β–‘β–’β–β–€β–„β–€β–€β–€β–€β–’β–’β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–Œβ–’β–€β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘
ascii art
November 2014

United States of America is now known as West Iran

twitchquotes: The year is 2024. The United States of America is now known as West Iran after the assassination of Supreme Leader Donald Trump from drone warfare. I hide in my nuclear bunker, praying to God that I survive another night. I open my laptop and see Kripp streaming some HS battlegrounds, still forcing murlocs and hardstuck at 7k MMR. "Still never lucky, huh old friend..." I whisper to myself as the bombs fall outside...
twitch chat
February 2020
Kripp

Hearthstone

Ultra Variety Pack bag of Dongers

twitchquotes: ΰΊˆΩ„ΝœΰΊˆΰΌ½οΎ‰ ΰΌΌ ΒΊΩ„ΝŸΒΊ ΰΌ½ ΰ­§ΰΌΌ Ν‘β—‰Ω„Νœ Ν‘β—‰ΰΌ½ΰ­¨ (ΰΈ‡ Ν Β° Ω„Νœ Β°)ΰΈ‡ γƒ½ΰΌΌΚ˜ΜšΩ„ΝœΚ˜ΜšΰΌ½οΎ‰ΰ­§ΰΌΌΰ² η›Šΰ² ΰΌ½ΰ­¨δΉ( β—” ΰ±ͺβ—”)ㄏ─=≑Σ((( γ€β—•Ω„Νœβ—•)぀ (ΰΈ‡ β€’Μ€_‒́)ΰΈ‡β”Œ(Β° ΝœΚ–Ν‘Β°)β”˜(ΰΈ‡ Ν  Ν Β° Ω„Νœ Β°)ΰΈ‡α•™ΰΌΌβ—•Ω„Νœβ—•ΰΌ½α•— Sorry, I dropped my Ultra Variety Packβ„’ bag of Dongers. ΰΌΌΰΊˆΩ„ΝœΰΊˆΰΌ½οΎ‰ ΰΌΌ ΒΊΩ„ΝŸΒΊ ΰΌ½ ΰ­§ΰΌΌ Ν‘β—‰Ω„Νœ Ν‘β—‰ΰΌ½ΰ­¨ (ΰΈ‡ Ν Β° Ω„Νœ Β°)ΰΈ‡ γƒ½ΰΌΌΚ˜ΜšΩ„ΝœΚ˜ΜšΰΌ½οΎ‰ΰ­§ΰΌΌΰ² η›Šΰ² ΰΌ½ΰ­¨δΉ( β—” ΰ±ͺβ—”)ㄏ─=≑Σ((( γ€β—•Ω„Νœβ—•)぀ (ΰΈ‡ β€’Μ€_‒́)ΰΈ‡β”Œ(Β° ΝœΚ–Ν‘Β°)β”˜(ΰΈ‡ Ν  Ν Β° Ω„Νœ Β°)ΰΈ‡α•™ΰΌΌβ—•Ω„Νœβ—•ΰΌ½α•—
twitch chat
June 2014
Kripp
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