[Copypasta] When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade (Portal)

When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I'm the man who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I'm gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!
May 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Tall Dog

░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░ ░░░▄▄░░░░░░░░░░░▄▄░░░░░ ░░░█░▀▄░░░░░░░▄▀░█░░░░░ ░░░█░░░▀█▀▀▀▀█░░░█░░░░░ ░░▄▀░░░░▀░░░░░░░░░█░░░░ ░░█░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░█░░░ ░▄▀░░░░░▄▄░░░░██░▄▄░█░░ ░█░░░▀▀░▀▀░░░░░░▄░░░░█░ ░█░░░░░░▄░░░███░░█░░░█░ ░█░░░░░░░█▄▄▄█▄▄▀░░░░█░ ░█░░░░░░▀▄▀█▀▀█▀░░░░░█░ ░█░░░░░░░░▀█▄▄▀░░░░░░█░ ░█░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░█░ ░█░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░█░ ░█░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░█░ ░█░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░█░ ░█░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░█░ ░█░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░█░ ░█░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░█░ ░█░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░█░ ░█░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░█░
December 2019

The legend of the button

twitchquotes: The legend of the button grew as the potential dust reward that came with it increased. But in the end when the no life Kripparian who had long sold out pressed it, the playful sprites robbed him of his joy and crashed his client. Kripp fell to his knees and in a solemn proclamation said "Never Lucky".
twitch chat
June 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

I hardly ever watch twitch anymore

twitchquotes: I hardly ever watch twitch anymore, and it’s mostly because of cringe chat. All you do is copy and paste the same things or constantly repeat the same stupid emotes in response to everything. So predictable and annoying
twitch chat
September 2020

We wub you Reynoodle. Give chat a kissy kiss.

twitchquotes: (づ  ̄ ³ ̄)づ We wub you Reynoodle. Give chat a kissy kiss. (づ  ̄ ³ ̄)づ
twitch chat
May 2015
Reynad

Kripp 2

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄⢠⣾⣷⣔⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡀⣀⣼⣿⣷⣄⠄⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣏⠄⢘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⣿⠿⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣧⠄⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⣯⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⢻⣿⣟⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠤⣼⣿⠄⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣿⣶⣄⠼⠶⣖⣶⣼⣿⣿⣾⣶⣔⣀⣓⣦⣿⣿⣿⢺⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢹⣿⣿⣿⠿⠋⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣎⡛⢿⣿⣿⣿⡏⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⢪⣄⣤⠄⠐⠈⠙⠛⠛⠉⠄⠉⠛⠢⣽⣾⡿⠄⠘⡹⠿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡷⠈⠹⣧⣀⣠⡤⠴⠶⠶⠶⢦⣴⣤⣤⣿⠃⠁⢠⣮⡟⢰⣿⢟⣽ ⣿⢙⢮⣻⣿⡁⠄⠄⠉⠙⢿⣿⣦⡀⡀⣀⣼⣿⡿⢻⠂⠄⢠⣿⣿⢁⣿⢃⣿⣿ ⣦⡐⣼⣿⣿⣧⠄⡗⣄⡀⠈⠙⠛⠛⠚⠛⠋⠋⠄⢀⠄⣠⣿⣿⣿⡿⣱⣿⣿⣿
November 2020
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing