[Copypasta] When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade (Portal)

When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I'm the man who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I'm gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!
May 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
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⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠟⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⡶⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣆⣼⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣦⣄⢀⡠⠤⠶⠶⢶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣤⣤⣤⣀⣀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⢻⣿⣿⣯⡤⠤⣤⣤⡤⠤⠾⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⡠⢤⣤⣤⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣼⣿⣿⣋⡀⠀⠀⠀⡰⠂⠀⢹⣿⣿⠙⠸⡁⠀⡆⠈⡙⠛⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⣾⣿⣿⡟⠸⠀⠀⠀⢠⣭⣉⡛⠻⠿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢁⠃⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⠆ ⢻⣿⣿⣟⠛⠛⠛⠛⠿⠿⠯⢿⣿⠿⠿⠿⢿⡏⡌⠀⠀⠀⢰⣿⡟⠿⣿⣿⡿⠀ ⣦⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣤⣤⣴⣶⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⡤⡰⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣏⠁⠀⢼⣿⠃⠀ ⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢡⡇⠀⠀⠀⢰⣿⣿⣧⣶⣿⡏⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⣦⣌⣹⣿⣿⣿⠏⠉⠉⠈⠁⣾⠀⣷⣦⣤⣈⡉⠛⠻⠿⠿⠁⠀⠀
February 2021
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LOOKS LIKE I ROLLED AN AD DIE

twitchquotes: 🎲 PowerUpL Jebaited LOOKS LIKE I ROLLED AN AD DIE 🎲 PowerUpL Jebaited LOOKS LIKE I ROLLED AN AD DIE 🎲 PowerUpL Jebaited LOOKS LIKE I ROLLED AN AD DIE 🎲 PowerUpL Jebaited
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October 2017
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YuGiOh Ad Marathon

Padoru

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄⡠⢲⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠔⣈⣀⠄⢔⡒⠳⡴⠊⠄⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄ ⠄⢜⡴⢑⠖⠊⢐⣤⠞⣩⡇⠄⠄⠄⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠄⠝⠛⠋⠐ ⢸⠏⣷⠈⠄⣱⠃⠄⢠⠃⠐⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠸⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠈⣅⠞⢁⣿⢸⠘⡄⡆⠄⠄⠈⠢⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠙⠛⠛⠛⠉⠉⡀⠄⠡⢀⠄⣀ ⠄⠙⡎⣹⢸⠄⠆⢘⠁⠄⠄⠄⢸⠈⠢⢄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠑⢿⠈⢆⠘⢼⠄⠄⠄⠄⠸⢐⢾⠄⡘⡏⠲⠆⠠⣤⢤⢤⡤⠄⣖⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣴⣶⣿⣿⣣⣈⣢⣸⠄⠄⠄⠄⡾⣷⣾⣮⣤⡏⠁⠘⠊⢠⣷⣾⡛⡟⠈⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠉⠒⢽⠄⠄⠄⠄⡇⣿⣟⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣻⡿⡇⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⠰⢼⠄⠄⠄⡄⠁⢻⣍⣯⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⢿⣻⠃⠈⡆⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠙⠿⠿⠛⣿⣶⣤⡇⠄⠄⢣⠄⠄⠈⠄⢠⠂⠄⠁⠄⡀⠄⠄⣀⠔⢁⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⠢⣖⣶⣦⣤⣤⣬⣤⣤⣤⣴⣶⣶⡏⠠⢃⠌⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠿⠿⠟⠛⡹⠉⠛⠛⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠠⠤⠤⠄⠄⣀⠄⠄⠄⠑⠠⣤⣀⣀⣀⡘⣿⠿⠙⠻⡍⢀⡈⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠑⠠⣠⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠉⠄⠻⣿⣷⣄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
December 2018

I want to give you head

twitchquotes: I want to give you head. Yes, head. Not the one you're thinking of. Not even in a sexual way. I want to give you heads up about the walk for charity. Yes, a walk for charity through which we can touch the lives of children living in extreme poverty.
twitch chat
February 2019

Not your naked body

Hey Kripp. it's Chris from Overwolf

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp. it's Chris from Overwolf. We're sorry to say we have to terminate your sponsor contract due to the fact that you consistently keep losing, even though you're using decks drafted through the HearthArena app. You are simply bringing us too much unneeded bad reputation, so we figure we'd just channel the funds we spend on you on a better player like Amaz. Sorry for this, and good luck in the future.
twitch chat
September 2018
Kripp

Hearthstone

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