[Copypasta] When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade (Portal)

When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I'm the man who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I'm gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!
May 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Yuumi this, Yuumi that

twitchquotes: Yuumi this, Yuumi that... For fucks sake chat you do this every time a new champion comes out. Everybody says they are too weak and need buffs. Michael is the ONLY one who goes against the grain to show you that indeed the 27% winrate is a myth and will demonstrate that perfectly clearly how it should be closer to 10%...
twitch chat
May 2019
imaqtpie

League of Legends

Canadian sex

twitchquotes: thrusts "Sorry!" thrusts "Sorry!" thrusts "Sorry!" thrusts "Sorry!" thrusts "Sorry!" thrusts "Sorry!" thrusts "Sorry!" thrusts "Sorry!" thrusts "Sorry!" thrusts "Sorry!" thrusts "Sorry!" thrusts "Sorry!" thrusts "Sorry!" thrusts "Sorry!" thrusts "Sorry!" thrusts "Sorry!" thrusts "Sorry!" thrusts "Sorry!" thrusts "Sorry!" thrusts "Sorry!" thrusts "Sorry!" thrusts "Sorry!" thrusts "Sorry!" thrusts "Sorry!" thrusts "Sorry!" thrusts "Sorry!" thrusts "Sorry!" thrusts "Sorry!" thrusts "Sorry!" thrusts "Sorry!" thrusts "Sorry!" thrusts "Sorry!"
twitch chat
November 2020

Endgame spoilers

twitchquotes: I just saw endgame, and it was pretty good, but there were a few weird things. I thought it was strange how the Russo Brothers decided to render Thanos’ erect penis in such vivid detail. The veins were so perfectly done I couldn’t even tell his cock wasn’t real. Another thing I found weird was when Black Panther broke the fourth wall and gave the audience the n-word pass. I did appreciate it, but it would feel more in place in a Deadpool movie. Overall, it was still excellent, but I think that they definitely need to reconsider some things.
twitch chat
May 2019

Happy toilet paper

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠤⠔⠒⠒⠶⠤⠤⠤⠤⠤⠤⢤⣤⣤⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡞⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡠⠚⠁⠀⠀⠀⠉⠛⢦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⡜⢀⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡸⠀⠀⠀⢀⠤⢄⡀⠀⠀⠹⡀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢠⠃⡼⢿⣷⡝⡄⢨⣿⣯⡑⡄⡇⠀⠀⠀⠇⠀⠀⠹⡀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠸⡄⣷⣾⣿⢃⠇⠸⣬⣿⡇⠇⡇⠀⠀⠰⠀⠀⠀⢠⠃⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢧⠈⢻⠟⠁⠀⠈⠛⠿⠝⠃⠸⡀⠀⠀⠣⣀⡠⠎⠀⠀⢠⠃⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣗⢀⠠⠤⠀⢀⡀⠀⣀⠀⠀⠱⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⡙⢢⢀⣠⠔⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⡍⢻⠙⠲⠶⠶⠖⠚⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⢷⣤⣬⣍⣱⣶⣶⠖⠉⠹⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠢⢏⣐⣋⣩⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡜⠉⠀⠒⠂⠀⠤⠄⢀⡀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⠁⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠒⠉⠉⠙⢧⣀⣤⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠋⠙⠢⠤⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
November 2020

Math is "mental abuse to humans"

twitchquotes: You know how some people say that math is “mental abuse to humans”? Well, lemme tell you one thing: “Math” is an abbreviation for “mathematics”, so you’re only looking at 36% of the whole thing. What does the other 64% stand for? It stands for “except mostly at truly intelligently cool students”! That means, if you think math is mentally abusing you, you’re not truly intelligent or cool! You’re dumb and lame! So the next time someone gives you the first 36% of this ridiculous acronym, give them the other 64%. Don’t forget to tell them that they suck at etymology.
twitch chat
October 2020

Classic

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