[Copypasta] When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade (Portal)

When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I'm the man who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I'm gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!
May 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

IM DELETING YOU, BROTHER!

twitchquotes: IM DELETING YOU, BROTHER! ██]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]] 10% complete..... ████████]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]] 35% complete.... ████████████]]]]]]]]]]]] 60% complete.... █████████████████] 99% complete..... 🚫ERROR!🚫 💯True💯 Brothers of Islam are irreplaceable ☪I could never delete you Brother!💖 Send this to ten other 👪Mujahideen👪 who would give their lives for ﷲAllahﷲ Or never get called ☁️Brother☁️ again If you get 0 Back: Juhanam for you 🚫†✡🚫 3 back: you're off the martyr list☁️💦 5 back: you have pleased Allah greatly☪💦 10+ back: JANAHﷲ!ﷲ!💕💕☪👅👅
twitch chat
August 2020

Anime girl 6

⠄⠄⢿⣇⠄⠄⠘⣆⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⡿⣿⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⢧⡲⣿⢷⢦⡀ ⠄⠄⠈⣿⠄⠄⠄⢙⢞⢿⣿⢹⢿⣦⢏⣱⢿⠘⣿⣝⠹⢿⣿⡽⣿⣿⣏⣆⢿⣿⡞⠁ ⠄⠄⠄⢻⡀⠄⠄⠈⣾⡸⡏⢸⡾⣴⣿⣿⣶⣼⣎⢵⢀⡛⣿⣷⡙⡻⢻⡴⠨⠨⠖⠃ ⠄⠄⠄⠈⣧⢀⡴⠊⢹⠁⡇⠈⢣⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣿⣷⣜⡳⣝⢧⢃⢣⣼⢁⠘⠆⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⢹⡇⠄⣠⠔⠚⣅⠄⢰⣶⣦⣭⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠿⣷⡧⠄⣘⣟⣸⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢷⠎⠄⠄⠄⣼⣦⠻⣿⣿⡟⠛⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⡾⢱⣿⡏⠸⡏⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠸⡄⠄⡄⠄⣿⢧⢗⠌⠻⣇⠿⠿⣸⣿⣿⡟⡐⣿⠟⢰⣇⠇⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⡆⠄⠃⢠⠏⣤⢀⢢⡰⣭⣛⡉⠩⠭⡅⣾⢳⡴⡀⢸⣿⡆⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢀⣶⡟⣽⠼⢀⡕⢀⠘⠸⢮⡳⡻⡍⡷⡆⠤⠤⠭⢸⢳⣷⢸⡟⣷⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⣴⣿⢫⢞⣵⢏⡞⠄⢸⠄⣛⣗⠩⠄⣰⣚⠒⠂⣀⡀⢸⢸⣿⣧⠇⡼⣧⠄⠄⠄ ⢠⣾⢟⡴⢫⡾⣱⢟⠄⠄⢸⠄⢈⡓⡮⡦⡬⠽⡠⠄⠔⠄⢸⠈⣿⣿⡄⣷⢹⣆⠄⠄ ⡿⢁⠞⢀⣿⢣⠇⣿⠄⠄⠸⢀⢳⢣⣗⣿⡇⡔⠄⠔⠄⠄⢠⠄⠹⣿⣷⡝⣧⢻⣆
December 2018

Weebs

Ban one 12 year old, get the whole 9gag

twitchquotes: haHAA BAN haHAA ONE haHAA 12 haHAA YEAR haHAA OLD haHAA AND haHAA YOU haHAA GET haHAA THE haHAA WHOLE haHAA 9GAG haHAA
twitch chat
December 2018

Ban X Get The Whole Y

Oh great! Another 2 sentence long pasta!

Oh great! Another 2 sentence long pasta! What a game changer! I'm sure the 5 measly lines of text you just posted are going to be the next big copypasta in no time! This is hilarious! Great Stuff! I can really see this being the next big thing! It's gonna be the next "Navy Seal" or "Penguin Of Doom", I can feel it! I love how short and boring it was! Extra points for being extremely forgettable with no interesting lines, a complete lack of tone, and, as I mentioned earlier, an extremely compact 30 to 40 word length! You know what you should do? You should, unprompted, post this godawful pasta in the comments of a post on a separate subreddit and when people downvote you you can post it to r/AteThePasta! Now that would be funny! Almost as funny as the pasta itself, which, may I remind you, is extremely short! God I can't believe you came up with this all on your own! Thanks so much for this! It's truly a gift! And it made me realise that no matter how hard I try I will never find a copypasta as funny as this roughly 30 word paragraph that has already been forgotten by the 47 people who upvoted it, and the 20 people who commented !thesaurizethis over and over again! And I should give up all hope of coming up with such a great pasta in my life, so I'm simply going to kill myself tonight! This is your fault! Your copypasta made me kill myself! I'm going to write your reddit username in my suicide note, as well as the entire copypasta, which I should have no trouble fitting on the page since it's so fucking short! Thanks again! 😁
May 2022

Kripp is a casual vegan

twitchquotes: Coke is not vegan. Vegans and vegetarians should note that a our drinks contain small traces of fish gelatine, which is used as a stabiliser for the beta-carotene colour. Not only is Kripp a casual gamer, he is a casual vegan as well!
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp
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