When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I'm the man who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I'm gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!
(βΜΏΔΉΜ―ββ¬β΄β¬β΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Headphones
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βββββββΒ Β Β Β Β βΒ Β ββΒ Β Β Β βΒ Β ββββββββ
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I hardly ever watch twitch anymore
twitchquotes:
I hardly ever watch twitch anymore, and itβs mostly because of cringe chat. All you do is copy and paste the same things or constantly repeat the same stupid emotes in response to everything. So predictable and annoying
twitch chat
Response to "go fuck yourself"
What if I'm already fucking myself? Behind this simple insult hides a universal paradox that may put your sexuality in question. Let's do a simple thought experiment: imagine us two standing in front of each other. I, of course, am wearing a pair of jeans, that are covering my genitals and my butt. You then command me to "go fuck myself". I may be fucking myself already. I may as well not be fucking myself already. Until my dick and its position relative to my ass is observed, it is simultaneously in my ass, but also outside of it - thus, it stays in superposition. The moment you lay eyes on my penis, both states collide with each other and become either one. You may have already guessed what the problem here is. As soon as a single photon reflected by my dick enters either one of your eyes, you become gay. The only way to avoid this is to not observe my penis. But if you don't look at it, then you will never know if your insult had any effect, thus rendering it meaningless. Since you have already made the insult, you are now, too, in superposition - you're either wrong, or gay. It's unfortunate, really - you dug a hole for yourself without even knowing it. All you can do now is accept it, and learn from your mistakes.
Classic
SIMP SUMMER IS OVER
twitchquotes:
SORRY SLUTSβΌοΈπ€πSIMP SUMMERπIS OVERπ
π»ββοΈπ«YOU BETTER FUCK OFF ππΌββοΈBECAUSE NO βSIMP βSEPTEMBER HAS ONLY JUST BEGUNππ»ππ» YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS ππ³ LOOKS LIKE THE πTURKEYπ ISNT GETTING ANY SLURPY π§ TONIGHTπβΌοΈ PREPARE π€π»UR PUSSIES ππ»ππ»FOR A DRY SPELL βοΈ CAUSE ITS TIMEπ FOR THE BOYS π€πͺπΌTO FOCUS π ON THEMSELVES πYOU SLUTS BEST SAVE YOURSELVES FOR THAT GOOD DICKππ»π SEND THIS TO 7οΈβ£ OF YOUR BIGGEST HOESπ―ββοΈTO LET THEM KNOW YOU'RE READYπFOR NO βSIMPβSEPTEMBERππ»ππ»
twitch chat
Simps
Emoji Pasta
HOW LONG CAN THIS GO ON
twitchquotes:
β 
HOW LONG β CAN THIS β GO ON β
HOW LONG β CAN THIS β GO ON β
twitch chat