[Copypasta] Cinco de Mayo origin

Most people donโ€™t know but back in 1912, Hellmanโ€™s mayonnaise was manufactured in England. In fact the Titanic was carrying 12,000 jars of this delicious condiment, scheduled for delivery in Vera Cruz, which was to be the port for the great ship after its stop in New York. This would have been the largest ever shipment on mayonnaise ever delivered to Mexico. But as we know the great ship did not make it to New York. This ship hit an iceberg and sank and the cargo was forever lost. The people of Mexico, who were crazy about the tantalising condiment, and were eagerly awaiting the delivery, were disconsolate at the loss. The anguish was so great that they declared a national day of warning which they sill observe to this day. The national day of mourning occurs every year on the 5th of May, you probably know it as Cinco de Mayo
May 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Navy Seal

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, kiddo.
April 2019

Classic

Navy Seal

Y U NO

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–€โ–„ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–‘ โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€ โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘
ascii art
December 2020

Tomato Town Police Report

The residents of Tomato Town need your help identifying two suspects who were about to get down while involved in an event on Monday evening. Ten people were eliminated, and the two suspects, one injured, left the scene headed Southbound and were later spotted at a local park. The two suspects were armed with golden scar ARs and were โ€œhitting that chug jugโ€ as several witnesses stated. Please alert local Tomato Town authorities with any information regarding the duo.
March 2021

Fortnite

forsenSheffy

โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโ ฟโ ›โ ‰โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ ‰โ ›โขฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโกฟโ Ÿโ ‰โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โข€โกคโขฒโ คโก€โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โขป โฃฟโฃฟโกฟโ ‹โ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โก€โข€โฃžโฃฑโฃœโฃถโขฑโฃ„โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โขจ โฃฟโ ‹โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โฃโฃฟโฃฟโฃทโฃธโขฐโฃฟโฃทโกƒโ „โ „โ „โฃ โฃพ โ ƒโ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ จโ ฟโ ฟโขฟโ ฟโกฟโฃฟโฃฟโ …โ „โฃ โฃพโฃฟโฃฟ โฃทโฃ„โก€โ „โ „โฃ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ ฐโฃฟโฃฅโกฟโ โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ ฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโก‡โ „โ ˜โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โฃคโฃพโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโ „โ „โ „โ „โฃฐโฃถโ †โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ พโขฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโก„โ „โ  โ šโฃ‰โฃฟโ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โ ฐโฃขโฃดโ „โ „โ „โ  โ „โขฐโฃถโฃพโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโกโฃทโฃคโก„โฃถโฃฟโฃฟโฃโ ’โ คโ „โ „โ „โ „โ ‘โฃฎโฃปโก†โ „โ „โ „โ „โฃนโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃ‡โกŸโขฉโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃทโฃพโฃฆโฃคโฃคโ „โ „โ šโ ˆโ โ ˜โฃคโฃ€โฃ โฃทโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃทโฃฌโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโกฟโ „โ „โ „โ „โ „โฃคโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃ‹โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโกฟโ „โขˆโฃ€โ „โ „โ „โขคโก™โขปโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฏโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโกโ ฐโ บโ โ „โ „โข€โฃ€โฃฟโกคโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃพโฃจโ ‰โ ‰โ „โฃพโฃฟโฃฟโก—โ โ „โ ™โ ปโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟ
ascii art
November 2021
Forsen

Emote

I am wondering if you are selling cat meat

twitchquotes: Dear Mr. Morosan. Hello. I am wondering if you are selling cat meat. I hear from reliable swords that you cook cat regular. Please give me some, I give you my wife. Thank
twitch chat
July 2015
Kripp
More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing