[Copypasta] There's no reason to have a Dad Bod when push ups exist

There's no reason to have a Dad Bod when push ups exist. I'm always finding time to crank out a few p-ups. Ahh yep, I do maybe a thousand p-ups a day and I'm a father of two. Those nerds coloring with crayons? Time to squeeze in a few p-ups. Little dorks eating mac and cheese? It's p-up time. I'm like a leathered marble statue of a really muscular guy, my muscles are so tight and rugged. Hell, I took a p-up break while typing this comment. The ladies at work, these little work ladies, love when I crank out p-ups right there in front of them and come up off the floor red faced and with a sizeable bulge in my slacks. That bulge is unrelated to the p-ups, by the way, I'm just a guy who's always one hard nipple poking through a shirt away from a full meat platter. Hell, I'd cheat on my wife with one of these little work ladies if she wasn't one of the little work ladies I work with. We bone in the bathroom. I get jacked on p-ups and then we bone in the bathroom and there's nothing my boss can do about it because my vascularity is way too intimidating. I tell him he should do some p-ups if he wants to fuck my wife. It's the only way she gets that slizz juiced and loosed. She wants to see multitudinous p-ups and she wants to see those p-ups now! Whoops! Haha, okay, looks like she's watching me type this over my shoulder. Uh oh. See ya later, nerdbags. I'm gonna p-ups myself up to a full plumper and pump that honey ham rump of my little work lady wife.
April 2021
I used to be a real ad
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The Picture

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp, Micheal here. Yes, your highschool boyfriend. I still have our private picture. "The picture". If you dont want this to be posted on internet - send me your cat.
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November 2014
Kripp

Lost to EU at Worlds

twitchquotes: FeelsBadMan Lost to EU at Worlds FeelsBadMan Lost to EU at MSI FeelsBadMan Lost to EU at Rift Rivals FeelsBadMan EU lul... I guess... FeelsBadMan at least I can laugh at H2K FeelsGoodMan Nvm still more semis than us FeelsBadMan 🔫
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August 2018

League of Legends

EU vs NA

DAPPER NO

twitchquotes: smallcat why are you so small FeelsGoodMan mellow why are you so cute FeelsGoodMan Lisha i love you FeelsGoodMan DAPPER NO FeelsBadMan
twitch chat
July 2017
imaqtpie

Kurumx's head with a bird

⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⣩⣴⣶⣦⣍⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⢏⣾⣿⣿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣌⢻⠛⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⠟⣩⣬⣭⠻⣿⣀⣿⣿⣿⢟⣤⠄⠈⠄⠉⠛⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣷⣤⣒⠲⠶⢿⣘⣛⣻⠿⣿⣸⣿⣿⣷⣌⠄⠄⠄⠄⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠄⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣌⠈⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣇⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣀⣤⣤⣶⣶⣶⣦⣤⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠈⢀⠄⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠻⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠈⠎⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠠⣻ ⣿⣿⣯⢰⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠿⠛⠻⠻⠻⢿⣿⣧⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣾ ⣿⡿⢿⡀⠄⠄⠈⠉⠻⠋⣧⠄⢀⠈⠉⠈⢀⣀⣤⣤⠄⠄⣀⣴⡦⣨⢻ ⣿⣧⣤⣭⡄⠄⠄⠄⣴⣦⢙⣿⣦⣼⣶⡿⣼⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿⢻⣿⣯⣿ ⣿⣿⣝⣿⠏⢀⠄⢰⣿⣿⣿⣦⣭⣭⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢵⣿⣿⣿⢿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⠓⠺⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⡥⣬⣿⣿⠋⣾⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠄⠁⠄⠄⣊⣊⣐⣀⠄⢹⣿⣿⠿⢣⣲⣴⣿⣿⠄⠄⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠈⣍⣭⣿⣿⡟⠈⠁⢲⣡⡤⡙⢾⢿⣿⣶⣶⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠄⠄⠈⠿⠟⠟⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⣲⣿⣿⣿⡻⢿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿
March 2021
Kurumx

Teamfight Tactics

Twitch Popo

twitchquotes: Hi Forsen. This is the twitch popo. I heard you wanted me to "come at you?" I'm here to give you the bannerino
twitch chat
November 2014
Forsen
Text-to-Speech Playing