[Copypasta] Oh, these? My boobies?

Oh, these? My boobies? My massive fucking titties? My super stuffed milkies? My honker bonker doinky boinkies? My fucking fabric stretching wind flapping gravity welling sex mounds? You mean these super duper ultra hyper god damn motherfucking tits?
April 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

It's Chad from your freshman English class

twitchquotes: Hey you little gayboy, nice hat. It's Chad from your freshman English class, remember me, dork? I thought I'd pop in after finishing my first 60 reps at the gym - y'know, that place REAL men go to? Anyways, guess you're still playing video games like a sissy cuck - AS USUAL. Thought maybe you'd man up after highschool, but now you're wearing skirts and makeup for a bunch of dweebs online. Have a nice life, dumbass.
twitch chat
April 2018
Sneaky

KappaPride

Tanner from High School

I sexually identify as a Minecraft creeper

twitchquotes: I sexually identify as a Minecraft creeper. Ever since I was a child I dreamed of stalking people in the dead of the night, making an erotic hissing noise, and then spewing my particles all over them. People say to me that a person being a monster in a dying Swedish pixel game is impossible and I’m more autistic than a Fortnite default, but I don’t care, I’m beautiful. I’m having a doctor fill me with gunpowder and implementing green and black pigments into my skin. From now on I want you guys to call me "Creepus Explodus” and respect my right to appear on retarded children's backpacks and sweaters. If you can’t accept me you’re a mob-phobe and need to check your entity privilege. Thank you all for being so understanding.
twitch chat
March 2019

I sexually Identify as

Navy Seals Copypasta in Yoda Language

You just fucking say about me what the fuck did, you little bitch? Graduated top of my class in the navy seals I have, and involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Qaeda I've been, over 300 confirmed kills and I have. Trained in gorilla warfare and the top sniper in the entire us armed forces I am. Hing to me but just another target you are not. Never been seen before on this earth. Wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has, I will, mark my fucking words. You can get away with saying that shit to me over the internet you think? Again think, fucker. Contacting my secret network of spies across the USA I am, and being traced right now your IP is. So prepare for the storm as we speak, you better ,maggot. Your life the storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call. Fucking dead, you are, kid. Anywhere I can be, anytime, and kill you in over seven hundred ways, I can , and with my bare hands ,that's just . Extensively trained in unarmed combat not only am I, access to the entire arsenal of the united states marine corps, I also have, and use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, I will, you little shit. Known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you if only you could have. Held your fucking tongue maybe you would have. But you couldn't, you didn't, the price and now you're paying, you goddamn idiot. shit fury all over you, I will and drown in it, you will. Fucking dead, you are kiddo.
December 2020

Navy Seal

Nyan Cat

________β–„β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–„______ _______β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆ_____ _______β–ˆβ–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–€β–€β–„β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–„β–€β–€β–„_ __β–„β–„___β–ˆβ–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–“β–“β–“β–ˆ_ β–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–€β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–€β–„_ _β–€β–„β–„β–“β–“β–ˆβ–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–„β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–„β–“β–„β–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆ_ _____β–€β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–“β–’β–’β–“β–„β–“β–“β–„β–“β–“β–„β–“β–’β–’β–ˆ ______β–„β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–„β–“β–“β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–“β–„β–€_ ____β–„β–€β–“β–€β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–€β–€___ ____β–ˆβ–„β–„β–€_β–ˆβ–„β–„β–€_______β–ˆβ–„β–„β–€_β–€β–„β–„β–ˆ_____
November 2014

Rania came to the wrong dongerhood

twitchquotes: ΰΌΌ ΒΊΩ„ΝŸΒΊΰΌΌ ΒΊΩ„ΝŸΒΊΰΌΌ ΒΊΩ„ΝŸΒΊ ΰΌ½ΒΊΩ„ΝŸΒΊ ΰΌ½ΒΊΩ„ΝŸΒΊ ΰΌ½ YOU CAME TO THE WRONG DONGERHOOD, RANIA ΰΌΌ ΒΊΩ„ΝŸΒΊΰΌΌ ΒΊΩ„ΝŸΒΊΰΌΌ ΒΊΩ„ΝŸΒΊΰΌΌ ΒΊΩ„ΝŸΒΊ ΰΌ½ΒΊΩ„ΝŸΒΊ ΰΌ½ΒΊΩ„ΝŸΒΊ ΰΌ½
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing