My kids were listening to old town road by Lil Nas X and one of my kids asked me doesn’t he worship satan? Thinking face I said yes son sadly he does. I had to turn on No role modelz by J Cole to cheer him up My kids idolize someone better now! Thank you J Cole you’re a life saver!
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
Here's a brofist for you.... nah just kidding
twitchquotes:
( ° ͜ʖ͡°) 
Hey Kripp, here's a brofist for you.... nah just kidding ( ° ͜ʖ͡°)╭∩╮ go *** yourself 
Hey Kripp, here's a brofist for you.... nah just kidding ( ° ͜ʖ͡°)╭∩╮ go *** yourself
twitch chat
Kripp
A man was spotted coughing in his apartment in Lego city
A man was spotted coughing in his apartment in Wuhan city.
Start the acetylene torch.
HEY!
Build the acetylene torch.
Lock him up in his apartment.
Weld the door shut.
And censor the media.
The new events that didn't happen from Wuhan city.
(sets not available in China)
Coronavirus
Lego City
COVID
Puts on sunglasses
Sounds to me like...
( •_•)
( •_•)>⌐■-■
[punch line]
(⌐■_■)
Twitch is ruining my life!
PLEASE HELP!!! Recently my wife has introduced me to a streaming platform known as twitch. I got so into it I spent a full week only watching my favorite twitch streamers like pokimane and sukkuno. All was well until February 15th where I was having a very important presentation at my job. All eyes were on me when I instinctively said KEKW with a straight face and veins bulging through my neck; I burst out of the workplace so fast my shoes fell off and I slammed into my car so hard I created a sonic boost in the wind and cried to myself saying sadCHAMP. Last Saturday was my grandmas funeral and guess WHAT? I SAID F IN THE CHAT GIVING MY MEMORIAL SPEECH. ARRRGGHHHH I HATE TWITCHC ITS RUINING MY LIFE!!!!1!!1!
XL Super Sized Monster
twitchquotes:
"Oh my God," gasped Raina. That thing is HUGE, its going to make me so wet!. Kripp smirked, "Yup." He began pumping furiously as the pressure built up and his Vegan strength began to dwindle. "Are you ready?" Kripp said cheekily. "I don't know about this, I think we should..." but it was too late. Kripp blasted her point blank, gentlely bruising her skin with a pressure rating well above 2. "Next time you can do me," said Kripp as he put away his XL Super Sized Monster.
twitch chat
Kripp