I want to fuck a cheeseburger. Just having that cheesy goodness melt all around my cock would make me feel at ease with the world again. Being able to cum inside a dead cow makes me feel so alive. I have been banned from 231 McDonald’s for public masturbation. Whenever I see an ad for McDonald’s I get so fucking horny. God I want to fuck a cheeseburger.
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas
Lord Microsoft
10:43 PM, Microsoft Tower, Washington.
A figure stands in shadow, red lights from the theistic ceiling flood the spacious hall. Along the sides, hallmark pieces of technology are proudly displayed on golden pedestals. The Xbox, Windows, Hololens; At the center of it all, the vaccine.
"Microsoft Microbe Covid-19" the label on the syringe reads. A glowing substance can be seen sitting still inside.
Monitors flicker to life at the end of the hall, each one showing the point of view of an innocent civilian. The light draws a silhouette of a man. His body, frail. His skin is leathery and rugged. Breathing apparatus cover his face, a cold green mist slowly spewing out.
The grand door opens, humanoids armed with weapons drag an unkempt and furious man towards the being in shadow. They throw him to the floor, spit slathering the ground.
"This is the last one?" the figure asks.
"Yes, Lord Microsoft. all 4,607,423,673 other citizens have been accounted for."
The rugged man looks upwards, his face bloodied and bruised. His eyes meet Lord Microsoft's. Puffed from tears, his eyes can only show one emotion: anger.
"Bill Gates, you piece of shit. I swore to Samantha that if I ever-"
"Silence, creature!" Lord Microsoft slaps him with the back of his hand. "I am lord Microsoft, and you will refer to me as such!"
The guards grab the man, hoisting him up.
"Now, let us delay no further. It has taken me years to get to this point, and I will not have my victory denied!" Lord Microsoft grabs the vaccine and primes it for injection.
"Such a small thing, isn't it? Yet, it has afforded me the right to dominate all life on Earth. Covid was a blessing, not a curse."
The man's eyes widened, he screams in retaliation, but the guards shut his mouth with force. Lord Microsoft pierces his flesh with the needle. A flourescent orange liquid can be seen coursing through his veins. He falls to the floor, his muscles tightening and constricting in unnatural fashion. His eyes bulge from his skull and he shouts in pain.
He slumps over, and in only a moment he comes back to his feet. His pupils dilated and his skin, pale.
"How may I serve you, my lord."
COVID
Coronavirus
Indian Zven
Jagjeevan "Zven" Shirishkumar is a LoL professional player playing for Chakla 9 (C9) in the Indian Sub-league. He currently works as a tea farmer in Mahasamund. He aspires to be an electrical engineer in Chennai.
C9Zven
League of Legends
This endeavor of knowledge 5Head
twitchquotes:
🍷 Ah yes, I can feel my head throbbing with knowledge and wisdom as I sip upon this Sauvignon blanc. Come chatroom, who will join me in this endeavor of knowledge 🍷
🍷 Ah yes, I can feel my head throbbing with knowledge and wisdom as I sip upon this Sauvignon blanc. Come chatroom, who will join me in this endeavor of knowledge 🍷
twitch chat
Classic
Among us ritual
Go to the bathroom at 3:33 am, then open youtube and play among us drip song then do the jerma sus face and repeat the word "sus" in front to the mirror for 666 times, if the ritual worked then a voice from your parents room will say "shut up", you will then hear a creature walk to the bathroom, at this point destroy the mirror before he enters In the bathroom if the ritual worked then the next day your parents will start discussing about you having mental problems
Among Us / Amogus
Spam emotes every time Mario does his jump attack
twitchquotes:
Hey guys, I'm here from Maple Story, just wanted to say that I can see why you were being a bunch of immature children in chat - seeing as you literally play a kids game. Honestly, it's just sad seeing you losers spam emotes every time Mario does his jump attack or whatever. Grow up!
twitch chat