Flying, and travel in general, is stressful. And want to know one of the best stress relievers? That's right, masturbation. So what if a person wants to relieve some of that tension by spanking the monkey or flicking the bean? There's nothing wrong with paddling the pink canoe or Jackin' the beanstalk. It's totally natural to give yourself a nice little under the pants handshake. We all need to visit the purple headed soldier from time to time. It's not hurting anyone so if it's not your forte, just put on your headphones and ignore the man next to you playing a solo on his skin flute. Society should be way more accepting of masturbation on airplanes.
What happened to this ad? :(
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Clash Royale
You have posted a bad meme
twitchquotes:
Greetings. It appears as though you have posted a "bad meme". Now, it isn't too late to rectify your error! With these simple steps, you can redeem yourself int he eyes of your internet peers. 1) ctrl + w 
twitch chat
How I got into Harvard
Many people always ask me how I was able to get into Harvard as a 16 year old who skipped 3 grades of high school. They think I got in because of my scholarly records, but no the key is the interview.
As I sat in the Harvard Dean's office in front of the board of reviewers for my application, the Dean asks me "Why should you be a good candidate for this school?" They seemed bored but I replied "Well I was born a child prodigy, placed 1st in my state spelling bee for three consecutive years, I can speak eight different languages not counting Latin, play four different instruments, I skipped grades 4 through 6, and graduated my high school as valedictorian at the age of 14. I then worked as an intern at both Telsa, and NASA." Suddenly the room burst into laughter and many of board instantly started scribbling down "No" near the application check marks. The Dean says "Sorry but you are just not the type we are looking for." But then I said "Excuse me but I wasn't finished... I watch Rick and Morty" The Dean looked at me like an idiot and said "So....?" Then I replied with a smile "And I understand all the references and subtle jokes" An audible gasp let out by the board was so loud the secretary had to come in. You could hear a pin drop and then suddenly all at once the entire board clicked their pens on the "Approved Box" and I was instantly handed a diploma and now I'm teaching advanced physicals there. I guess you can say I'm pretty smart.
Rick and Morty
Commonwealth of Veganism
twitchquotes:
We have claimed, for Electoral Vote purposes, the Commonwealth of Veganism (which won’t allow legal meat eaters) the State of Twitch, and the State of Kripparian, each one of which has a BIG Vegan lead. Additionally, we hereby claim the State of Lettuce if, in fact, there was a large number of secretly dumped carrots as has been widely reported!
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Kripp
Are you Reynad's dad?
twitchquotes:
I went to a MTG tournament in Denver to meet Brian Kibler and ask him in person "Are you Reynad's dad?" I needed the truth. I approached Kibler and asked him for a semen sample. Kibler gave a coy smile, "There's only one way you're getting semen out of me." I got on my knees and took the sample. I still don't know if Kibler is Reydad but we've been dating for 5 days now.
twitch chat
Reynad