[Copypasta] Masturbation on a plane should be socially acceptable

Flying, and travel in general, is stressful. And want to know one of the best stress relievers? That's right, masturbation. So what if a person wants to relieve some of that tension by spanking the monkey or flicking the bean? There's nothing wrong with paddling the pink canoe or Jackin' the beanstalk. It's totally natural to give yourself a nice little under the pants handshake. We all need to visit the purple headed soldier from time to time. It's not hurting anyone so if it's not your forte, just put on your headphones and ignore the man next to you playing a solo on his skin flute. Society should be way more accepting of masturbation on airplanes.
March 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Trump nuclear ramble

Look, having nuclearβ€”my uncle was a great professor and scientist and engineer, Dr. John Trump at MIT; good genes, very good genes, OK, very smart, the Wharton School of Finance, very good, very smart β€”you know, if you’re a conservative Republican, if I were a liberal, if, like, OK, if I ran as a liberal Democrat, they would say I’m one of the smartest people anywhere in the worldβ€”it’s true!β€”but when you’re a conservative Republican they tryβ€”oh, do they do a numberβ€”that’s why I always start off: Went to Wharton, was a good student, went there, went there, did this, built a fortuneβ€”you know I have to give my like credentials all the time, because we’re a little disadvantagedβ€”but you look at the nuclear deal, the thing that really bothers meβ€”it would have been so easy, and it’s not as important as these lives are (nuclear is powerful; my uncle explained that to me many, many years ago, the power and that was 35 years ago; he would explain the power of what’s going to happen and he was rightβ€”who would have thought?), but when you look at what’s going on with the four prisonersβ€”now it used to be three, now it’s fourβ€”but when it was three and even now, I would have said it’s all in the messenger; fellas, and it is fellas because, you know, they don’t, they haven’t figured that the women are smarter right now than the men, so, you know, it’s gonna take them about another 150 yearsβ€”but the Persians are great negotiators, the Iranians are great negotiators, so, and they, they just killed, they just killed us.
September 2021

Donald Trump

Mic Muted

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March 2015

Classic

Dog Face (no space)

twitchquotes: FrankerZ = Dog Face (no space)
twitch chat
March 2014
TheOddOne

I'm leaving this community, jerma can't keep getting away with this

I'm leaving this community, jerma can't keep getting away with this After jerma's recent apology video, it seemed like the only thing he cared about before going live was his looks. He came onto stream and honestly seemed slightly drunk. He proceeded to spend time talking about how fun it was to 'woohoo' death. He used another term, but due to me actually caring about the people here, I decided it's better to censor myself. He did briefly apologize for the Amelia situation, but that twitlonger she wrote really exposed the absolute horror of being stood up and finding your date in bed with the reaper of souls himself. I think the worst part of the apology was how he kept saying "that isn't who I am" but proceeded to fall asleep once again at the end. Also I'm fairly certain he was still on the toilet. I heard a few weird noises. I really hope this psycho gets banned. p.s. I'm starting to think the 'jerma speared and killed a man' conspiracy theory may have had been real.
March 2022
Jerma985

TWITCH PLAYS POT OF GREED

twitchquotes: TWITCH PLAYS POT OF GREED EleGiggle IT PLAYS TWO MORE ADS EleGiggle TWITCH PLAYS POT OF GREED EleGiggle IT PLAYS TWO MORE ADS EleGiggle TWITCH PLAYS POT OF GREED EleGiggle IT PLAYS TWO MORE ADS EleGiggle
twitch chat
October 2017
TwitchPresents

YuGiOh Ad Marathon

Text-to-Speech Playing