Flying, and travel in general, is stressful. And want to know one of the best stress relievers? That's right, masturbation. So what if a person wants to relieve some of that tension by spanking the monkey or flicking the bean? There's nothing wrong with paddling the pink canoe or Jackin' the beanstalk. It's totally natural to give yourself a nice little under the pants handshake. We all need to visit the purple headed soldier from time to time. It's not hurting anyone so if it's not your forte, just put on your headphones and ignore the man next to you playing a solo on his skin flute. Society should be way more accepting of masturbation on airplanes.
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas
SUS
β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬
β¬β¬π΄π΄π΄π΄β¬π΄β¬β¬π΄β¬π΄π΄π΄π΄β¬β¬
β¬β¬π΄β¬β¬β¬β¬π΄β¬β¬π΄β¬π΄β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬
β¬β¬π΄π΄π΄π΄β¬π΄β¬β¬π΄β¬π΄π΄π΄π΄β¬β¬
β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬π΄β¬π΄β¬β¬π΄β¬β¬β¬β¬π΄β¬β¬
β¬β¬π΄π΄π΄π΄β¬β¬π΄π΄β¬β¬π΄π΄π΄π΄β¬β¬
β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬
Among Us / Amogus
Kripp can't beat anyone
twitchquotes:
My dad beats me 
My mom beats me My brother beats me My sister beats me At least I feel safe with Kripp, because he can't beat anyone 
My mom beats me My brother beats me My sister beats me At least I feel safe with Kripp, because he can't beat anyone
twitch chat
Kripp
Classic
Hello this is Dan from the next room over
twitchquotes:
Hello this is Dan from the next room over. Can you be quiet for 2 minutes it's almost 2am and I can still hear you. I have had a hard day doing REAL work for 13 hours and all I want is a bit of peace and quiet. LOL just kidding it's Tanner from highschool again, enjoy playing your kids games while I'm hanging out with Becca. We're watching re-runs of that time you lost that video game tournament. Peace out!
twitch chat
Tanner from High School
Hikaru and Magnus fanfic
twitchquotes:
"Your chess is insane." Hikaru said, as he slipped his feminine hand into Magnus's pants and smirked. "Are you trying to mate me?" protests Magnus, as Hikaru blushes, the boyish figure undressed before Magnus. "Weak tempo play, Hikaru." The two kissed, deeply and passionately, and afterwards Magnus places his Rook into Hikarus open line.
twitch chat
GMHikaru
Chess
Please put an NSFW tag on this
Please put an NSFW tag on this. I was on the train and when I saw this I had to start furiously masturbating. Everyone else gave me strange looks and were saying things like βwhat the fuckβ and βcall the policeβ. I dropped my phone and everyone around me saw this image. Now there is a whole train of men masturbating together at this one image. This is all your fault, you could have prevented this if you had just tagged this post NSFW.