[Copypasta] Masturbation on a plane should be socially acceptable

Flying, and travel in general, is stressful. And want to know one of the best stress relievers? That's right, masturbation. So what if a person wants to relieve some of that tension by spanking the monkey or flicking the bean? There's nothing wrong with paddling the pink canoe or Jackin' the beanstalk. It's totally natural to give yourself a nice little under the pants handshake. We all need to visit the purple headed soldier from time to time. It's not hurting anyone so if it's not your forte, just put on your headphones and ignore the man next to you playing a solo on his skin flute. Society should be way more accepting of masturbation on airplanes.
March 2021
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More Copypastas

Pedo bear: come into my house

twitchquotes: __Μ΄Δ±Μ΄Μ΄Μ‘Μ‘Μ‘ ̑͌lΜ‘Μ‘Μ‘ ̑͌lΜ‘*Μ‘Μ‘ Μ΄Μ‘Δ±Μ΄Μ΄Μ‘ Μ‘Μ‘Ν‘|Μ²Μ²Μ²Ν‘Ν‘Ν‘ Μ²β–«Μ²Ν‘ Μ²Μ²Μ²Ν‘Ν‘Ο€Μ²Μ²Ν‘Ν‘ Μ²Μ²Ν‘β–«Μ²Μ²Ν‘Ν‘ Μ²|Μ‘Μ‘Μ‘ Μ‘ Μ΄Μ‘Δ±Μ΄Μ‘Μ‘ ̑͌lΜ‘Μ‘Μ‘Μ‘.__come into my house Κ•β€’α΄₯β€’Κ”
twitch chat
September 2014
Kripp

EPICLY TROLLING MY CLASS WITH AMONG US!!!!

So today I trolled my class with Among Us in an epic way. We were doing a test and were putting numbers into the computer to log into the test. It reminded me of Among Us so I shouted, "IS THAT AN AMONG US REFERENCE?!?!" I then pointed at the kid next to me, who was wearing a red shirt, and yelled, "RED SUS! RED SUS! VOTE OUT RED HE'S SUS!" The teacher tried to pull me out of the classroom but I stabbed him with a pencil epic John Wick style! I proceeded to scream, "DEAD BODY REPORTED!" Then they EXPELLED me and it was kind of sus the way they did it. On my way out of the school I saw a vent so I grabbed the nearest kid and shoved him into the vent! I cracked his skull but it was just a joke so it's okay. My therapy starts tomorrow
April 2021

Among Us / Amogus

Clap

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September 2020

Kripp reviews a card

twitchquotes: ☐ I got the beast in my sights ☐ Hoot hoot ☐ That belongs in a museum ☐ Let me change your mind β˜‘ I looked at this card originally, and I thought, you know, it’s a card, and you play this card. The card will be that card that you’ve played, so you’re playing a card. So it is one thing to play a card if your opponent doesn’t really have any cards. The card will screw up the card pretty hard, and that means it’s a pretty good card.
twitch chat
May 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

Undertale Annoying Dog

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–„β–€β–„β–€β–€β–€β–€β–„β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–‘ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–„β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–„β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–„β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–„β–€β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘
March 2016
Text-to-Speech Playing