Flying, and travel in general, is stressful. And want to know one of the best stress relievers? That's right, masturbation. So what if a person wants to relieve some of that tension by spanking the monkey or flicking the bean? There's nothing wrong with paddling the pink canoe or Jackin' the beanstalk. It's totally natural to give yourself a nice little under the pants handshake. We all need to visit the purple headed soldier from time to time. It's not hurting anyone so if it's not your forte, just put on your headphones and ignore the man next to you playing a solo on his skin flute. Society should be way more accepting of masturbation on airplanes.
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas
Will this affect my Wayne
twitchquotes:
Hello, Reynad I have been the butler of a very prestigious family for a very long time. Couple I work for has just recently been shot and killed, I have been left to take care of him but, he has resort to a life of crime fighting which is very dangerous. Will this affect my Wayne.
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Reynad
We will not go quietly into the night!
twitchquotes:
We will not go quietly into the night! 
We will not vanish without a fight! We’re going to live on! We’re going to survive! Today, we celebrate our Independence Day! BROTHERS, HOLD THE LINE 🏥 _🔪
We will not vanish without a fight! We’re going to live on! We’re going to survive! Today, we celebrate our Independence Day! BROTHERS, HOLD THE LINE 🏥 _🔪
twitch chat
Kripp
EHE TE NANDAYO
twitchquotes:
EHE TE NANDAYO 
EHE TE NANDAYO EHE TE NANDAYO EHE TE NANDAYO EHE TE NANDAYO EHE TE NANDAYO EHE TE NANDAYO EHE TE NANDAYO EHE TE NANDAYO EHE TE NANDAYO PunO
EHE TE NANDAYO EHE TE NANDAYO EHE TE NANDAYO EHE TE NANDAYO EHE TE NANDAYO EHE TE NANDAYO EHE TE NANDAYO EHE TE NANDAYO EHE TE NANDAYO PunO
twitch chat
Weebs
This ELO IS UNFAIR
twitchquotes:
THIS ELO IS UNFAIR! TIMTHEFATMAN IS IN THERE! LOSING EVERY GAME SESSION! GIVING HIS TEAM DEPRESSION!
THIS ELO IS UNFAIR! TIMTHEFATMAN IS IN THERE! LOSING EVERY GAME SESSION! GIVING HIS TEAM DEPRESSION!
twitch chat
TimTheTatman
Overwatch
Trolling My Dad's Office with Among Us (Office Series Part 5, Finale 2)
That's right. I am the IMPOSTER. I just killed my boss. I now had to convince everyone that I wasn't the imposter. "Chad is the imposter!" I randomly yelled out. Another coworker said "Well, I did see him running towards the stairs/elevator. "Wait, think about this!" Chad stated. "How do you know I'm the murderer? It could be him!" "Hmm.." My coworker, John, said. "Why do you think it's him, Darrius?" "Well," I started, "The same reason as you. I saw him running towards the elevator when the killing happened. "Wait, wait, wait!" Angelica proclaimed. "How do we know it happened on the top floor?" Another coworker, Adam, pointed out the window towards the paramedics wrapping up my boss' mangled corpse in a body bag." Oh!" Angelica said." That's a bit sussy," I said. "I think it must have been Angelica, she's pretending she doesn't know anything?" "Hmm, you might be right." My coworker Dave spoke up. "But I think that it might be you, Darrius." "Wait woah woah, why is it me?" I defended myself. He said "I saw you enter the elevator right before the murderer hit!" He said. Shit. he's onto me." Woah, you could be lying! I was in my cubicle doing my office work!" I yelled back." Oh really, what were you doing?" Dave said." I was uh.. scanning for viruses on my computer!" "Hmm.. okay." "I think that we should get rid of Liam." Angelica proclaimed. "Woah woah woah, pretty lady! Why do you think that?" He quickly hopped to his defense. "I haven't been a part of this discussion at all!" "Well, you're pale, and you work on the closest floor to the boss." Angelica replies. "Yeah, that's sus, Liam." I said. "We should get rid of him." "I agree." Chad said." Me too!" Adam said." Me three!" John said. And so we decided to throw him out the window.