[Copypasta] Masturbation on a plane should be socially acceptable

Flying, and travel in general, is stressful. And want to know one of the best stress relievers? That's right, masturbation. So what if a person wants to relieve some of that tension by spanking the monkey or flicking the bean? There's nothing wrong with paddling the pink canoe or Jackin' the beanstalk. It's totally natural to give yourself a nice little under the pants handshake. We all need to visit the purple headed soldier from time to time. It's not hurting anyone so if it's not your forte, just put on your headphones and ignore the man next to you playing a solo on his skin flute. Society should be way more accepting of masturbation on airplanes.
March 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

The Ghost of Gaming Future

twitchquotes: The Ghost of Gaming Future shows Kripp a nice house in the Toronto suburbs. Inside, Kripp, Rania and their sons are happily gaming as a family. "This isn't so bad," says Kripp. "Look closer," speaks the Ghost. Kripp looks in horror to see his sons are using tablets and playing browser cash-shop games. "This is your future Casualarrian."
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

There was nothing I could do but donate

twitchquotes: ☑ “These Hafu nudes are CRAZY!” ☑ “My dick can't stay limp against nudes like that” ☑ "She NEEDED precisely those two nips to win" ☑ “She took the only nudes that could make me beat off” ☑ "She had the perfect muff" ☑ “There was nothing I could do but donate” ☑ “She cried profusely"
twitch chat
October 2014

SeemsGood

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⠟⠋⠉⠉⠉⠉⠛⢿⣦⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣾⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⢿⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⡿⠁⠀⠀⣀⣤⣴⣶⣶⣦⣀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⠃⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠈⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⣛⠧⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⡆⠀⣿⣯⣭⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣷⣄⣾⡿⡿⠿⢟⣿⣿⣿⣟⣿⣭⣡⣶⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⡀⢻⣿⣿⣷⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⢧⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣞⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡧⠝⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣘⣿⣿⣾⣿⡽⣿⡿⢟⡃⠈⣉⡀⠈⠍⠙⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⠿⢛⣋⣅⠹⠰⣴⣷⣾⠿⠿⢿⣿⣦⠽⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠇⠈⠹⢿⣧⣾⣤⠹⡿⠃⣠⡿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⠞⠿⣦⣈⠉⠘⠏⠁⣀⣴⡿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⣏⣩⣤⣤⠄⠀⠉⠛⠻⠿⠿⠟⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠿⢿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
October 2020

If I see one more AYAYA

twitchquotes: Hey guys, I'm really trying to fucking watch the fucking channel and you all fucking spam your fucking copypastas non-fucking-stop and it's getting really fucking annoying. If I see one more fucking AYAYA, monkAS, "Press 1 if", :), counting, dancing emotes, "Only the true champion can champ this pog", or worst of all LONG TEXT COPYPASTAS, I'm going to fucking sign up for the fucking mars mission you fucks.
twitch chat
August 2018

I hate Twitch Chat

Only the saltiest one can hold both salts

twitchquotes: PJSalt ___ PJSalt only the saltiest one can hold both salt cans ⎝ Kappa
twitch chat
May 2016
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing