Flying, and travel in general, is stressful. And want to know one of the best stress relievers? That's right, masturbation. So what if a person wants to relieve some of that tension by spanking the monkey or flicking the bean? There's nothing wrong with paddling the pink canoe or Jackin' the beanstalk. It's totally natural to give yourself a nice little under the pants handshake. We all need to visit the purple headed soldier from time to time. It's not hurting anyone so if it's not your forte, just put on your headphones and ignore the man next to you playing a solo on his skin flute. Society should be way more accepting of masturbation on airplanes.
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas
Qt has finally reached rank one
twitchquotes:
The year is 2050, league is played by less than 100 people. Qt has finally reached rank one, "Lisha I did it!" he yells excitedly. The sound echoes through the empty mansion. Lisha left long ago...
twitch chat
imaqtpie
Classic
League of Legends
Oh great! Another 2 sentence long pasta!
Oh great! Another 2 sentence long pasta! What a game changer! I'm sure the 5 measly lines of text you just posted are going to be the next big copypasta in no time! This is hilarious! Great Stuff! I can really see this being the next big thing! It's gonna be the next "Navy Seal" or "Penguin Of Doom", I can feel it! I love how short and boring it was! Extra points for being extremely forgettable with no interesting lines, a complete lack of tone, and, as I mentioned earlier, an extremely compact 30 to 40 word length! You know what you should do? You should, unprompted, post this godawful pasta in the comments of a post on a separate subreddit and when people downvote you you can post it to r/AteThePasta! Now that would be funny! Almost as funny as the pasta itself, which, may I remind you, is extremely short! God I can't believe you came up with this all on your own! Thanks so much for this! It's truly a gift! And it made me realise that no matter how hard I try I will never find a copypasta as funny as this roughly 30 word paragraph that has already been forgotten by the 47 people who upvoted it, and the 20 people who commented !thesaurizethis over and over again! And I should give up all hope of coming up with such a great pasta in my life, so I'm simply going to kill myself tonight! This is your fault! Your copypasta made me kill myself! I'm going to write your reddit username in my suicide note, as well as the entire copypasta, which I should have no trouble fitting on the page since it's so fucking short! Thanks again! 😁
Artosis is glad Kripp is a sellout like him
twitchquotes:
ＷＥＬＬ ＭＥＴ ＫＲＩＰＰ， ＩＴ＇Ｓ ＭＥ ＡＲＴＯＳＩＳ． Ｉ＇Ｍ ＧＬＡＤ ＹＯＵ＇ＲＥ ＪＯＩＮＩＮＧ ＴＨＥ ＷＡＹ ＯＦ ＴＨＥ ＳＥＬＬＯＵＴ． ＣＯＮＴＩＮＵＥ ＢＥＩＮＧ Ａ ＣＡＳＵＡＬ ＳＥＬＬＯＵＴ ＬＩＫＥ ＭＥ ＡＮＤ ＹＯＵ＇ＬＬ ＧＲＯＷ ＩＮＴＯ Ａ ＪＥＷ ＮＯＳＥＤ ＧＡＭＥＲ ＪＡＣＫＥＴ ＳＥＬＬＯＵＴ
twitch chat
Kripp
How can this guy call himself a professional streamer
twitchquotes:
😡 How can this guy call himself a professional streamer when he CLEARLY has no clue about what he's doing. You're supposed to kill the application process tree not alt+f4 like a fucking monkey 
Seriously I'm done watching this guy and if I see any one of your fuckers copypaste this I'll delete my account 😡
Seriously I'm done watching this guy and if I see any one of your fuckers copypaste this I'll delete my account 😡
twitch chat
not an asexual thing
twitchquotes:
‘not an asexual thing’. try living a day in my shoes, walking around terrified of encountering sex everywhere i go. wherever i look, parents with children, people sucking each others’ faces. it makes me and millions of other aces out there feel really attacked.
twitch chat