[Copypasta] That's the power of cargo pants

twitchquotes: Excuse me? Cargo pants, motherfucker. My pockets have pockets. You can't stop the storage. And when it gets too hot, just unzip and remove the lower half of the legs. Utility, motherfuckers. Want me to hold your phone for a second? how about I hold one of every phone on the market, each with their own individual pocket. Want me to hold your souvenir from your vacation to Europe? How about I put Europe in my pocket. That's the power of cargo pants, motherfuckers
twitch chat
August 2019
I used to be a real ad
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Response to Pokimane saying she's disgusted by cum tributes

Really tired of being treated like Public Enemy #1 sometimes. There are a lot worst things going on in the world than a bunch of guys whipping out their cocks and sharing pics and vids of them and our loads. Especially when a lot of us are some of your biggest fans and simps who wouldn't hurt a fly and are just showing support in our own way. Just leave me in peace when I've had a bad day, need a release and you helped me through it.
July 2022
Pokimane

Pretending I'm Ahri

twitchquotes: Sometimes I like to put 9 towels into my anus and pretend I'm Ahri. Please no coperino and pasra macaroni, thank you! Sorry for bad England, I walk many Egyption miles to come watch.
twitch chat
December 2018

Classic

League of Legends

Trump wakes up with a scream and hugs his stuffed bear

twitchquotes: Trump wakes up with a scream and hugs his stuffed bear, "I just had the most awful dream, I was about to be tucked by Kibler!" Trump's bear replies, "That wasn't a dream." As Trump recoils in horror, Kibler smirks, "It seems I'm about to tuck Frump."
twitch chat
June 2015
Trump

Did you ever hear the tragedy of the man who fell into the river in Lego city?

Did you ever hear the tragedy of the man who fell into the river in Lego city? I thought not. It's not a story the Playmobils would tell you. It's a LEGO legend. Man Lego was a Dark Lord of building, so powerful and so wise he could use the bricks to influence the constructions to create rescue helicopters… He had such a knowledge of building that he could even keep the ones he cared about from falling. The dark side of the LEGOs is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice threw him into the river in LEGO city. Ironic. He could rescue others from the river, but not himself.
December 2020

Lego City

Tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise

you are now manually breathing

twitchquotes: :) you are now manually breathing :) you are now manually blinking :) you are aware that your tongue cannot find a comfy place in your mouth :) you are aware of all the itches on your body that need to be scratched :)
twitch chat
July 2017
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