[Copypasta] Burger King tweet thread: women belong in the kitchen tweet

Women belong in the kitchen. If they want to, of course. Yet only 20% of chefs are women. We're on a mission to change the gender ratio in the restaurant industry by empowering female employees with the opportunity to pursue a culinary career. #IWD - We are proud to be launching a new scholarship programme which will help female Burger King employees pursue their culinary dreams!
March 2021
Burger King tweet fail: https://globalnews.ca/news/7683800/burger-king-womens-day-kitchen-tweet/
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Chat has just turned into a cesspool

twitchquotes: At this point in the night the chat has just turned into a cesspool. There is no point in trying to have a meaningful discussion with anyone, it's just copy pasta this PJ Salt that. And the worst part is no one in the chat knows how to play the game so they just give ass advice. If this gets copied I will leave.
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I hate Twitch Chat

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Greetings Michael, this is your Mother

twitchquotes: Greeting Michael, this is your Mother. I heard earlier that you "maybe" 420 blaze it. I am very concerned. I dont like that Pobelter boy and I dont think you should hang out with him anymore. I hope the rest of you concerned mothers in twitch chat will copy paste this so my son will see...
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what's a fella gotta do to get some apple juice?

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⠄⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢀⣤⠖⢋⡤⠊⠁⠀⠀⣀⣠⣤⣤⣦⣤⣄⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣾⠁⢀⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢠⡿⣫⣶⣿What's⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿a⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢀⣿fella⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠉⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠁⠈⠻⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣾⣿gotta⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⣀⡀⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢠⣤⡀⠀⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀ ⠀⢸⣿⣿do⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⢸⣿⣿⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠃⢠⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀ ⠀⣼⣿⣿around⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣾⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀ ⠀⢸⣿⣿here⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⠋⠀⠀⣀⡈⠉⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⠀ ⠀⢸⣿⣿to⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣤⣤⠾⠛⣿⡶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢿⣿get⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣌⠳⣄⣀⡿⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠀⢀ ⠀⠀⠈⢿⣿some⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣮⣭⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⢀⣴⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿apple juice?⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣫⣶⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣶⣤⣄⡀⠈⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
ascii art
April 2019

Oh my gourd, I am financially ruined (agricultural futures)

I have lost everything, and I'm not sure how to continue. This summer I invested $17,500 (six months salary and my entire life savings) into ornamental gourd futures, hoping to capitalize on this lucrative emerging industry. After watching a video about Vincent Kosuga and his monopoly on onions, I decided I'd try to do something similar with another vegetable. I did some research and found out many agricultural forecasters expected this year's gourd yield would be far smaller than the past, due to deteriorating soil conditions in central Mexico and a warmer-than-average spring. At first, demand soared around Halloween and prices skyrocketed, but the gourd bubble burst on November 12th. Unfortunately, the coronavirus caused a massive drop-off in demand due to fewer families decorating their tables for thanksgiving, and prices plummeted. I had invested early enough that I thought I would still be fine, but then on the morning of December 2nd, a new email in my inbox caused my stomach to turn into a pretzel. The massive gourd shipment from Argentina, scheduled for early March, had arrived. I was planning on selling off my futures right before this, in February, but this ruined everything. To top it off, the gourds in this shipment were absolutely gargantuan, some topping 4 pounds each, causing the price-per-pound to drop like an anchor into the range of 6 cents per pound. I am ruined.
January 2021

Classic

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