[Copypasta] I've been making fake sub names for Kripp

twitchquotes: Hey, my name is Carlton Pasterino. I have something to confess. For the last 3 years I've been making fake sub names for Kripp. He pays me pennies and dimes to come up with 50 new names a day. From Thundercuck to MrRabbit69, I've made over 80% of his subs up for him. I'm tired of working like a child laborer. I'm ready to go back to college and make something of myself. I'm here to let the world know.
twitch chat
December 2016
Kripp

Classic

I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas

Kripp reviews a card

twitchquotes: ☐ I got the beast in my sights ☐ Hoot hoot ☐ That belongs in a museum ☐ Let me change your mind ☑ I looked at this card originally, and I thought, you know, it’s a card, and you play this card. The card will be that card that you’ve played, so you’re playing a card. So it is one thing to play a card if your opponent doesn’t really have any cards. The card will screw up the card pretty hard, and that means it’s a pretty good card.
twitch chat
May 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

Hitler's message to Kripp

twitchquotes: Well Met Kripp. This is Hitler from 1940. I came here to recruit your mods to be officers in my third reich army. please no copy seig heil pasterino .
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

MODS

A donger with a monocle

twitchquotes: (╭ರ_⊙) what, never seen a donger with a monocle? (╭ರ_⊙)
twitch chat
May 2015
Kripp

Art of Conquest Developer visits Kripp's stream

twitchquotes: 🔧(Art of Conquest™ Developer): Hey Kripp! Just popping on to make sure you started streaming our game on time. Remember to read the script we sent at the appropriate times, as stated. We have arranged for your requested reward of various veggies and rainbowed colored 10-inch cucumbers to arrive within a week at your house. We will send you some thick broccoli if you include "not sponsored" in your stream title. We hope you will enjoy your rewards and wish you and your vegan family a good day.
twitch chat
January 2018
Kripp

sellout

I can no longer resist the pizza

twitchquotes: I can no longer resist the pizza. I open the box and unzip my pants with my other hand. As I penetrate the gooey cheese, I moan in ecstacy. The mushrooms and Italian sausage are rough, but the sauce is deliciously soothing. I blow my load in seconds. As you leave the bathroom, I exit through the front door....
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing