[Copypasta] Cathie Wood owns 100% of palantir and 110% of Tesla

December 2021. Cathie Wood owns 100% of palantir and 110% of Tesla (Elon Musk invented a more efficient form of security). ARK ETFs are trading at minimum $1,000 a share and investors are signing 10-year pledges just for the privilege. I log on to my Tesla taxi app and order a car. A vintage Roadster pulls up with EDM playing at a tasteful volume. "Where to, King?" asks the anime girl on the console. "You know where", I reply. Palantir knows. We both laugh and the car takes off to Wendys.
March 2021

WallStreetBets

https://www.reddit.com/r/wallstreetbetsOGs/comments/lx47ty/what_are_your_moves_tomorrow_march_04_2021/gplg7qp
I used to be a real ad
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The Battle of Gamestop rages on.

The Battle of Gamestop rages on. Pre-market we could hear the bears in no-manโ€™s land, baiting us towards higher prices so the shorts could do their dirty work. I was stationed at the 13.80 line, and knew the morning was going to be hot. I shoveled a breakfast of tendies and said a quick prayer to Father Cohen. When the bell rang, the bears surged into our trenches. Blood and rainbow fur filled the air and littered the ground. The Diamond Division has seen worse days, and we held firm. As the bears retreated we gave chase to retake ground weโ€™d lost in the past week. As I caught my breath near the 14.50, I could see bodies everywhere; paper hands who had fallen in earlier battles. One of them groaned and reached a hand towards me. I spat on him and kept moving. No honor in retreat, and no sympathy for self-inflicted wounds. This war wonโ€™t be won in a day, but it will be won. Tell my wifeโ€™s boyfriend to tell her I love her.
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Buying calls on Gamestop

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GME $1000 IS NOT A MEME

๐Ÿš€๐Ÿš€๐Ÿš€ UPVOTE/GILD SO PEOPLE CAN SEE ๐Ÿš€๐Ÿš€๐Ÿš€ LISTEN TO ME. DO NOT SELL TOMORROW. OR ANY DAY THIS WEEK. Drops are coming. They are counting on fear to beat us. Itโ€™s the only weapon they have on us, but it wonโ€™t work because we are retarded. The people are finally taking the power back from these boomer hedge fund big money shorting douchebags - the same people who fucked everyone over in 2008 with CDOs and continue to fuck you over to this day. Get ready to make Melvin throat hard retard dick. We only have strength if we stay in this TOGETHER. HOLD THE LINE. THE SHORT SQUEEZE HASNT HAPPENED YET. Donโ€™t pussy out you fucking idiots. $1000 IS NOT A MEME. I love you all, you beautiful autistic bulls. Hang tight while we ride this thing into the FUCKING STRATOSPHERE. APES TOGETHER STRONG ๐Ÿฆ ๐Ÿ’Ž ๐Ÿš€
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Classic

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