I'm starting to think the people telling me to buy BB at $20 were being serious about not being financial advisors
I used to be a real ad
More WallStreetBets Copypastas
Christmas for a wsb trader
As the tree blinks from white to red to green, you look at the void under the tree that previously held presents. Fewer this year than usual, but some.
How did you get here? Boredom? In March, you felt trapped with your wife and infant. You needed something to pass the time. Something you could throw yourself into fully.
βAre you coming to bed?β your wife yells down the stairs. It seemed harmless at first, but as the pandemic drew on, so did your investment. Youβll stop soon, though. βSoon!β you reply, and you hear her feet climb the steps.
The lights start to blink chaotically. You cringe because you could only afford the junk strands at CVS. Suddenly they haltβthe alternation feature brokenβon red. The red fills the room and covers your flesh. You look down at your hands, and they look like theyβre bleeding. Like your calls.
After a timeβhours?βyou realize youβre sitting in complete darkness. Your lights have expired, worthless.
WallStreetBets
Kelly Loeffler after Georgia senate election
Kelly Loeffler I know you're at home right now feeling a little sad. And now you're in bed browsing WSB looking for hot stock tips with maybe a few laughs. But just know this: I will have sex with you. DM me.
WallStreetBets
Stock space rocket
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γγγΛγγγγγγγγγγγγγγ*γγγγγγ
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β¦ γγγγγγγγγγ γ β β β β γγγγ γγγγγγγγγγγγ,γγβββγ
.γγγγγγγγγγγγγ.γγγοΎγββγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγγγγ.
γγγγγγ,γγγγγγγ.γγγγγγββββγγγγ
γγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγββοΈ γγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγβββ
γββββββγγγγγββββββββγγγγγγγγγγγγγ.
γγγγγγγγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγγγγ.
γγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγβββββββγβββγγγγ γγγγγγγγγγγγγ
γγβββββββγβββγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγβββββββγβββ β¦
βββγγγ,γγγγγγγγγγ[stock ticker]π γγγγ γγ,γγγ β β β β γ
γγγγγγγγγγγγ.γγγγγβγγ γγγ.γγγγγγγγγγγγγβγββββ
ββββββγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγΛγγγ γ ββγγγγ,γγγγγγ
γγγγβββββββγββββγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγ.γγγ
βγγββββγγγγγβγγγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγγγγγγ* γγ
ββγγγγγ β¦ γγγγγγγβββββββββγββββββββγγγγ γγβγ
γγγγγβγγγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγ.γγγγγββββγγ.
γβγγγγγ.γγγγ π
γγγγγβββγγγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγββ
γΛγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγοΎγγγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγγγγγ
. γγβγ π β β β β β β β β β β ,γ γγγγγγγγγγγγγγ*
.γγγγγβγγγγγγγγγγγγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγ β¦ γγγγββ γ
γγγΛγγγγγγγγγγγγγγ*γγγγγγβ βγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγ.
WallStreetBets
Red futures :(
Bought a bunch of calls thinking I was going to be able to afford an escort to shit on my chest, now it's these red futures that are shitting on my chest.
WallStreetBets
If Apple opens super green tomorrow
If Apple opens super green tomorrow, I will buy a green Apple and cut a 1/4in hole in it and fuck it with my peen.