[Copypasta] GME revamp

GME should keep their retail stores but make it more of an experience like Hooters. Workers should be hot big tiddy goth girls or whatever other fetish gamers have. Bonuses if they have active social media (Instagram, Tik Tok, Only Fans, etc.) and extra bonus if they also stream on Twitch. 100% guaranteed increase traffic and sales in stores (simp farms). Literally cannot go tits up.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

https://www.reddit.com/r/wallstreetbets/comments/k9c95d/gme_earnings_thread/gf3phtf
I used to be a real ad
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We should buy Reddit

We should buy Reddit. Not the stock. The actual company. If we all get together and own 51% then we will own this entire website. We could make the rules, profit from the advertising, and finally get paid for the memes we make. I've even come up with a list of things we could do as new owners: Reddit mods can apply for paid-internships at Reddit. This is much closer to having a real job than what they currently do and would benefit the organization. Your flair is your official title at the company. IE: instead of "CFO" you'll be "PotatoFart" NSFW posts will receive special protections--and if you happen to work in our new skyscraper then NSFW posts are automatically considered SFW. Everyone gets a turn in the corporate jet. Elon becomes a mod. He can also apply to become a paid intern. We have a monthly party on our company yacht: The S.S. VisualMod. Our corporate cafeteria is a dining hall with fast food restaurants along the side--but they're all Wendy's. I think this is a great idea. Keep it high and tight. ๐Ÿ‘–๐Ÿš€๐Ÿ‘–๐Ÿš€๐Ÿ‘–๐Ÿš€
December 2021

WallStreetBets

Reddit

GME $1000 IS NOT A MEME

๐Ÿš€๐Ÿš€๐Ÿš€ UPVOTE/GILD SO PEOPLE CAN SEE ๐Ÿš€๐Ÿš€๐Ÿš€ LISTEN TO ME. DO NOT SELL TOMORROW. OR ANY DAY THIS WEEK. Drops are coming. They are counting on fear to beat us. Itโ€™s the only weapon they have on us, but it wonโ€™t work because we are retarded. The people are finally taking the power back from these boomer hedge fund big money shorting douchebags - the same people who fucked everyone over in 2008 with CDOs and continue to fuck you over to this day. Get ready to make Melvin throat hard retard dick. We only have strength if we stay in this TOGETHER. HOLD THE LINE. THE SHORT SQUEEZE HASNT HAPPENED YET. Donโ€™t pussy out you fucking idiots. $1000 IS NOT A MEME. I love you all, you beautiful autistic bulls. Hang tight while we ride this thing into the FUCKING STRATOSPHERE. APES TOGETHER STRONG ๐Ÿฆ ๐Ÿ’Ž ๐Ÿš€
January 2021

WallStreetBets

Classic

Mitch is the type of dude who...

Mitch McConnell shaves his face with the same razor he shaves his nuts and butt hole Mitch the type of guy to put on sunglasses to get another free sample at Costco Mitch the type of guy that says "you too" when the waitress tells him to enjoy his meal. Mitch the kinda guy to leave โ€œsmile moreโ€ on the tip section of a receipt Mitch is the type of dude who says "Ni Hao" to the waiter at a Thai restaurant Mitch the type of guy to shower then shit Mitch McConnell claps when the plane lands Mitch is the type of dude who thinks crest toothpaste is spicy Mitch the kind of guy that uses self checkout with a full cart.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

So Iโ€™m an AMC shareholder

So Iโ€™m an AMC shareholder, which means I own some of the business. Because the stock kept getting halted today I decided to go to my local AMC and support the stock by buying some concessions. I went up to the stand and told the casher (his nametag said Melvin) that I was a shareholder and wanted to support the business. He looked excited and told me to close my eyes and hold out my hand for a surprise shareholder treat. I canโ€™t believe it, but he just covered my hands in liquid butter! Now Iโ€™m typing this at home and cant get it off my hands, and my keyboard is all greasy typing this, What do I do?
January 2021

WallStreetBets

My wife told me to talk dirty to her

So the wife and I were getting into it and she told me to talk dirty to her. So I called her a filthy slut. She said โ€œdirtier!โ€ So I smacked her around and told her I was going to use her like the cheap whore she is. She said โ€œdirtier!โ€ So I said โ€œIโ€™m gonna stick some SQQQ in your portfolio. Iโ€™m gonna put it in long and deep. Iโ€™m gonna fill you up with way OTM SPY puts.โ€ She then slapped me, packed a bag and took the kids. I think weโ€™re getting a divorce.
April 2021

WallStreetBets

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