If you angerly masturbate to another guy's money and jizz in your mouth and compliment yourself for the taste when you're on your shift at work, then you've committed all 7 sins... with room to spare.
I used to be a real ad
More Classic Copypastas
It has been 4 hours since I successfully sucked...
It has been 4 hours since I successfully sucked my own penis. Things are different now. As soon as mouth-to-penis contact was made I felt a shockwave through my body. I have reason to believe I have super strength and telekinesis now.. 3 hours after contact I noticed a van parked on my street but no one has entered or exited the car since its arrival. I fear for my safety, I'm not sure what sort of power I may have stumbled upon but it's possible that the government has found out
Classic
I spend all day working my ass off at the pasta factory
twitchquotes:
I spend all day working my ass off at the pasta factory trying to provide pasta to hard-working people all across the world. After a long day of work, I come to Kripp's chat to unwind and have thought-driven discussions about my favorite game and favorite streamer. When I get here, however, all I see is pasta after pasta. All I want to do is escape my miserable life, but you fucks keep spamming.
twitch chat
Classic
I hate Twitch Chat
What is inside that taco? Reynad's tournament wins
twitchquotes:
WHAT IS INSIDE THAT TACO 
0 OH NO IT'S REYNAD'S TOURNAMENT WINS 
WHAT IS INSIDE THAT TACO 0 OH NO IT'S REYNAD'S TOURNAMENT WINS
twitch chat
Reynad
Classic
Hearthstone
Math is "mental abuse to humans"
twitchquotes:
You know how some people say that math is âmental abuse to humansâ? Well, lemme tell you one thing: âMathâ is an abbreviation for âmathematicsâ, so youâre only looking at 36% of the whole thing. What does the other 64% stand for? It stands for âexcept mostly at truly intelligently cool studentsâ! That means, if you think math is mentally abusing you, youâre not truly intelligent or cool! Youâre dumb and lame! So the next time someone gives you the first 36% of this ridiculous acronym, give them the other 64%. Donât forget to tell them that they suck at etymology.
twitch chat