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[Copypasta]Red futures :(
Bought a bunch of calls thinking I was going to be able to afford an escort to shit on my chest, now it's these red futures that are shitting on my chest.
Bought a bunch of calls thinking I was going to be able to afford an escort to shit on my chest, now it's these red futures that are shitting on my chest.
Jack Ma is making poop emoji pillows in a factory now 11 hours a day and you guys are making jokes about him š
Bears after a green day
Itās 4:01pm. Bears solemnly log out of their devastated brokerage account, get up from their makeshift desk made up of a stack of empty Michelinaās frozen lasagna dinners, head up the stairs of their fatherās basement, grab the keys to their tan ā97 Chevy Cavalier and a cloth mask embroidered with the word āVOTE,ā and drive down the street to the local gay bar for a holiday themed burlesque show.
Itās 4:01pm. Bears solemnly log out of their devastated brokerage account, get up from their makeshift desk made up of a stack of empty Michelinaās frozen lasagna dinners, head up the stairs of their fatherās basement, grab the keys to their tan ā97 Chevy Cavalier and a cloth mask embroidered with the word āVOTE,ā and drive down the street to the local gay bar for a holiday themed burlesque show.
Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth JPOW The Wise?
Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth JPOW The Wise? I thought not. Itās not a story the Motley Fool would tell you. Itās a š³ļøāšš» legend. Darth JPOW was a Dark Lord of the FED, so gay and such a bear he could use his money printer to influence the economy to create inflation⦠He had such a knowledge of the economy that he could even keep stonk prices from falling. The dark side of the economy is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be⦠transitory. He became so powerful⦠the only thing he was afraid of was losing his tendies, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught Nancy Pelosi everything he knew, then she sold at the top. Ironic. He could save others from market corrections, but not himself.
Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth JPOW The Wise? I thought not. Itās not a story the Motley Fool would tell you. Itās a š³ļøāšš» legend. Darth JPOW was a Dark Lord of the FED, so gay and such a bear he could use his money printer to influence the economy to create inflation⦠He had such a knowledge of the economy that he could even keep stonk prices from falling. The dark side of the economy is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be⦠transitory. He became so powerful⦠the only thing he was afraid of was losing his tendies, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught Nancy Pelosi everything he knew, then she sold at the top. Ironic. He could save others from market corrections, but not himself.
I'm buysexual
Iām buysexual, sometimes Iām a top (when I buy) and sometimes a bottom (when I sell)
Iām buysexual, sometimes Iām a top (when I buy) and sometimes a bottom (when I sell)
Christmas for a wsb trader
As the tree blinks from white to red to green, you look at the void under the tree that previously held presents. Fewer this year than usual, but some.
How did you get here? Boredom? In March, you felt trapped with your wife and infant. You needed something to pass the time. Something you could throw yourself into fully.
āAre you coming to bed?ā your wife yells down the stairs. It seemed harmless at first, but as the pandemic drew on, so did your investment. Youāll stop soon, though. āSoon!ā you reply, and you hear her feet climb the steps.
The lights start to blink chaotically. You cringe because you could only afford the junk strands at CVS. Suddenly they haltāthe alternation feature brokenāon red. The red fills the room and covers your flesh. You look down at your hands, and they look like theyāre bleeding. Like your calls.
After a timeāhours?āyou realize youāre sitting in complete darkness. Your lights have expired, worthless.
As the tree blinks from white to red to green, you look at the void under the tree that previously held presents. Fewer this year than usual, but some.
How did you get here? Boredom? In March, you felt trapped with your wife and infant. You needed something to pass the time. Something you could throw yourself into fully.
āAre you coming to bed?ā your wife yells down the stairs. It seemed harmless at first, but as the pandemic drew on, so did your investment. Youāll stop soon, though. āSoon!ā you reply, and you hear her feet climb the steps.
The lights start to blink chaotically. You cringe because you could only afford the junk strands at CVS. Suddenly they haltāthe alternation feature brokenāon red. The red fills the room and covers your flesh. You look down at your hands, and they look like theyāre bleeding. Like your calls.
After a timeāhours?āyou realize youāre sitting in complete darkness. Your lights have expired, worthless.