[Copypasta] Red futures :(

Bought a bunch of calls thinking I was going to be able to afford an escort to shit on my chest, now it's these red futures that are shitting on my chest.
February 2021

WallStreetBets

https://www.reddit.com/r/wallstreetbetsOGs/comments/lp6i1r/what_are_your_moves_tomorrow_february_22_2021/gob8p5c/
I used to be a real ad
More WallStreetBets Copypastas

bears are fuk

I hate people saying bears are fuk or bulls are fuk. Stop saying that. It's very rude. Just say bears are fuk
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Google employees complaints

Reading Google employees complaints about workplace is like watching Becky cry on social media how her life's ruined when she only got a new Hyundai for graduation instead of the audi she asked. Bitch give me that 300k job and I will deal with "my voice not being heard" all day every day.
January 2021

WallStreetBets

GME short squeeze

Lets dumb this down for you apes: - Let's say 5 banana's currently cost 10 dollar - One ape on the market has 5 banana's - Snake asks to borrow 5 banana's for a bit and instead sells the 5 banana's thinking price will go down soon (shorting). he thinks he can buy them later for less and give them back to ape, so he make's profit on the difference. - Group of apes notice what stupid snakes are doing and decide to buy all banana's on the market until snakes have no other choice than to buy from the group of apes in order to return what they borrowed - If group of apes stay strong then price will go 🚀🚀🚀
January 2021

WallStreetBets

GME bank consultation

Short story-time for amusement reasons only: some days ago, I went to my bank (Austria). I am the owner of quite a number of GME shares and my broker app is actually just the bank-intern bond trading app, where I need to pay transactional feed everytime I buy (what is sell?) GME shares. I informed myself about the reasoning of those transactional fees beforehand and found out that by paying them, I have the right of consultation by my bank about the shares they‘re trading/I‘m buying. So, I went to the main national building of my bank, they were really friendly at the beginning, enthustiatically, I mentioned GME to them and that I wish for professional consultation about the financial details involved with that stock (I am not a financial guy, actually, I don‘t exactly know what‘s going on, it‘s all pretty crazy to me). Suddenly, their posture and mimick changed pretty suddenly. I was told, they are not allowed to consult about GME. To my question, why this was the case, they told me, because GME is „too irrelevant for the big stock market“. They are „aware of the past short squeeze, but one should no longer focus on GME“. They acted as if GME was some „childish financial playground“ that should be forgotten about. When I confronted them with the huge recent naked short attacks and if they could explain to me possible effects of them if they were not covered, they just repeated themselves how „GME is not relevant, please focus on stocks like Apple or Amazon to be safe“. I left the bank, buying more GME shares.
April 2021

WallStreetBets

Stimulus hopes in the year is 2025

The year is 2025. House speaker Nancy pelosi's brain jar has agreed with Mitch McConnell's new human skinbody to vote on the $12 covid stimulus package. This is the 37th revision to the package initially introduced in late 2020. One dollar will be split between all americans, two between all illegal immigrants, and the rest to Jeff bezos. Due to stimulus hopes, SPY has rallied to 600.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

More WallStreetBets Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing