[Copypasta] Can I get my dick sucked by a tornado?

If you get pulled by a tornado, would the intense winds and stuff on your cock make you cum? And what would happen if that cum get thrown on something like a public park or near a school? Would you get registered if they found out it's your cum?
February 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

She sells seashells on a seashore, but the value of these shells will fall

She sells seashells on a seashore But the value of these shells will fall Due to the laws of supply and demand No one wants to buy shells 'cause there's loads on the sand Step 1: you must create a sense of scarcity Shells will sell much better if the people think they're rare, you see Bare with me, take as many shells as you can find and hide 'em on an island stockpile 'em high until they're rarer than a diamond Step 2: you gotta make the people think that they want 'em Really want 'em, really fuckin want 'em Hit 'em like Bronson Influencers, product placement, featured prime time entertainment If you haven't got a shell then you're just a fucking waste man Three: it's monopoly, invest inside some property, start a corporation, make a logo, do it properly ""Shells must sell"", that will be your new philosophy Swallow all your morals they're a poor man's quality Four: expand, expand, expand, clear forest, make land, fresh blood on hand Five: why just shells? Why limit your self? She sells seashells, sell oil as well! Six: guns, sell stocks, sell diamonds, sell rocks, sell water to a fish, sell the time to a clock Seven: press on the gas, take your foot off the brakes, Run to be the president of the United States Eight: big smile mate, big wave that's great Now the truth is overrated, tell lies out the gate Nine: Polarize the people, controversy is the game It don't matter if they hate you if they all say your name Ten: the world is yours, step out on a stage to a round of applause You're a liar, a cheat, a devil, a whore And you sell seashells on the seashore.
August 2021

PEPEGA

⣿⠛⣷⠀⠀⢸⣟⡛⠀⠀⣿⠛⣷⠀⠀⢸⣟⡛⠀⠀⣴⢟⣛⡀⠀⠀⣸⢿⣇⠀ ⣿⠉⠉⠀⠀⢸⣯⣥⠀⠀⣿⠉⠉⠀⠀⢸⣯⣥⠀⠀⢿⣮⣽⡇⠀⢠⡿⠶⣿⡄
July 2019

Valor To Me!

twitchquotes: (ง ͠° ͟ʖ ͡°)ง ᴠᴀʟᴏʀ, ᴛᴏ ᴍᴇ (ง ͠° ͟ʖ ͡°)ง <;º ༽ sǫᴜᴀᴀᴋ <;º ༽
twitch chat
August 2014
imaqtpie

voting booth inspection is not required

twitchquotes: So I was waiting in line to vote when all of a sudden this voting "official" came up to me and said that there was something wrong with my voter registration and asked me to follow him to the back. When we went around back he said that I had to take off my pants and show my cock because penis size is the most accurate way to confirm voter identity. Because I thought he was a voting official I swiftly removed my pants and underwear to show him my member. After he fondled it for a bit he said it was good and I could go back into the line. It was only after I voted I realized that he forgot to check my balls too!!! He was obviously not certified to check such an area and I immediately contacted the security guards about his presence. Please do not fall for any tricks like I did! stay safe and happy voting!
twitch chat
November 2020

2020 US Election

Putin had a private screening of Morbius

Vladimir Putin had a private screening of Morbius at the Kremlin. Rumor has it when he walked out, he burst into tears, called up his top generals, and ordered a full withdrawal of Russian troops from Ukraine. He then flew to Kyiv and personally signed a peace treaty with Volodymyr Zelenskyy, pledging the Russian ruble equivalent of $500 billion to the Ukrainian people to help repair damages caused by the war. When asked why he had this sudden change of heart, Putin responded “I have encountered the Morb, and he has Morbed in my heart. I now believe we must all allow ourselves to be Morbed for the sake of world peace.”
June 2022

Morbius

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