[Copypasta] Can I get my dick sucked by a tornado?

If you get pulled by a tornado, would the intense winds and stuff on your cock make you cum? And what would happen if that cum get thrown on something like a public park or near a school? Would you get registered if they found out it's your cum?
February 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Hi Tyler, this is the riot balance team

twitchquotes: Hi Tyler, this is the riot balance team contacting you due to your expertise in the game known as League of Legends. We wanted to invite you here, to riot studios, to singlehandedly write the code for the next big patch, rebalancing the game anyway you want! we know youre a much better player, coder, and balancer of games than we are. Thank YOU T1!!!
twitch chat
April 2018
Tyler1

League of Legends

Look, kid. You wanna give up?

twitchquotes: Look, ๐Ÿ‘€ kid. ๐Ÿ‘ฆ You ๐Ÿ‘ˆ wanna ๐Ÿ™ˆ give ๐Ÿ‘‰ up? ๐Ÿ”บ Fine. ๐Ÿ‘Œ But ๐Ÿ‘ you ๐Ÿ‘ˆ didn't ๐Ÿšซ get ๐Ÿ”Ÿ here ๐Ÿ‘ by ๐Ÿ˜ˆ giving ๐Ÿ˜˜ up. ๐Ÿ”บ You ๐Ÿ‘ˆ didn't ๐Ÿšซ get ๐Ÿ”Ÿ this ๐Ÿ‘ˆ far ๐ŸŒŒ by ๐Ÿ˜ˆ giving ๐Ÿ˜˜ up. ๐Ÿ”บ You ๐Ÿ‘ˆ didn't ๐Ÿšซ get ๐Ÿ”Ÿ all ๐Ÿ’ฏ these ๐Ÿ‘ˆ followers, fans, admirers, and ๐Ÿ‘ hot ๐Ÿ”ฅ groupies by ๐Ÿ˜ˆ giving ๐Ÿ˜˜ up. ๐Ÿ”บ Don't ๐Ÿšซ give ๐Ÿ‘‰ up. ๐Ÿ”บ You're ๐Ÿ‘‰ the ๐Ÿ‘ champ. You're ๐Ÿ‘‰ the ๐Ÿ‘ boshy.
twitch chat
September 2017
MOONMOON

I fucking hate gaming laptops

I fucking hate gaming laptops. Today when I walked into my economics class I saw something I dread every time I close my eyes. Someone had brought their new gaming laptop to class. The Forklift he used to bring it was still running idle at the back. I started sweating as I sat down and gazed over at the 700lb beast that was his laptop. He had already reinforced his desk with steel support beams and was in the process of finding an outlet for a power cable thicker than Amy Schumer's thigh. I start shaking. I keep telling myself I'm going to be alright and that there's nothing to worry about. He somehow finds a fucking outlet. Tears are running down my cheeks as I send my last texts to my family saying I love them. The teacher starts the lecture, and the student turns his laptop on. The colored lights on his RGB Backlit keyboard flare to life like a nuclear flash, and a deep humming fills my ears and shakes my very soul. The entire city power grid goes dark. The classroom begins to shake as the massive fans begin to spin. In mere seconds my world has gone from vibrant life, to a dark, earth shattering void where my body is getting torn apart by the 150mph gale force winds and the 500 decibel groan of the cooling fans. As my body finally surrenders, I weep, as my school and my city go under. I fucking hate gaming laptops.
January 2022

Google employees complaints

Reading Google employees complaints about workplace is like watching Becky cry on social media how her life's ruined when she only got a new Hyundai for graduation instead of the audi she asked. Bitch give me that 300k job and I will deal with "my voice not being heard" all day every day.
January 2021

WallStreetBets

Among Us teaches us to punish minorities

Among Us (coloquially termed "amogus") teaches us to punish the minority and hate those who are different and unique as "impostors." Instead, I like the breath of fresh air this problem provides as a new perspective on deduction that is not "red is sus, red vented, etc." that has been dominating the jokes of my peers and the view of my feed. Yet, by trying to force this problem to conform to "amogus," you yourself are trying to crush originality and uniqueness. Among Us is a game ultimately convincing us to conform to menial labor as "tasks" and accept the deal of being just like the rest of the crewmates.
October 2021

Among Us / Amogus

Text-to-Speech Playing