[Copypasta] Dear Kripp, I own the apple orchard outside Toronto

twitchquotes: Dear Kripp, I own the apple orchard outside Toronto and I am begging you to stop drinking so much OJ. Since you became popular on the Twitch our sales have decreased by over 69% because Canadians want to be like you. For *** sake please drink some apple juice! If you continue drinking OJ, I wont be able to feed my family anymore
twitch chat
July 2015
Kripp
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Kripp's kidney stone surgery

twitchquotes: There was a heated discussion among the medical experts gathered around an operating table, on which laid an unconscious Romanian man in his 30s. "The salt levels are off the charts!" exclaimed a cardiologist. The head surgeon sighs, "I guess this is what you get when you combine a vegan diet and a sedentary lifestyle playing a children's card game." Upon those words the body suddenly stirs, from which a muted voice barely croaks, "Tell...Rania...not to press...the button".
twitch chat
September 2016
Kripp

CATTARIAN WAS A SLOW AND DELICIOUS DINNER

twitchquotes: ( ͠° ͟ʖ ͡°) CATTARIAN WAS A SLOW AND DELICIOUS DINNER ( ͠° ͟ʖ ͡°)
twitch chat
August 2015
Kripp

It's NOT Sudoku or Subaru. It's Seppuku or Harakiri.

twitchquotes: I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Nihongo (Japanese for you gaijin), and I’ve been involved in numerous study abroad trips to Japan, and I have memorized over 300 kanji characters. You need to learn that the correct term for ritual suicide is Seppuku or Harakiri. It's NOT Sudoku or Subaru. Please educate yourselves.
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Eredar Lord of the Casual Legion

twitchquotes: ＹＯＵ ＦＡＣＥ ＫＲＩＰＰＡＲＲＩＡＮ： ＥＲＥＤＡＲ ＬＯＲＤ ＯＦ ＴＨＥ ＣＡＳＵＡＬ ＬＥＧＩＯＮ
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Kripp found dead

twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp
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