[Copypasta] These are classic hedge fund tricks.

WHAT'S HAPPENING RIGHT NOW IS NOT A SELL-OFF. Melvin Capital is going to throw a lot of tricks at us that will make it look like the stock is dropping. Don't fall for it. Do not sell if you see any of these things happen: GME drops by 30% or more after hours SEC filings show that shorts have all exited their positions GME drops below $1 a share The Gamestop locations near you start closing GME files for bankruptcy GME is delisted from the stock exchange Your bank forecloses on your home for late payment Your children have children of their own who grow up and become investment bankers and tell you that you should stop telling people you're "diamond handing" a company that went out of business 30 years ago These are classic hedge fund tricks.
February 2021

WallStreetBets

What happened to this ad? :(
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February 2021

WallStreetBets

Am I The Asshole for not being able to trade options for my dad? I’m 6.

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September 2021

WallStreetBets

Am I The Asshole?

My wife told me to talk dirty to her

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April 2021

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Buying calls on Gamestop

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January 2021

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