[Copypasta] you are NOT a Pokémon Trainer

twitchquotes: you are NOT a Pokémon Trainer. true trainers understand that battling requires us to see our opponents as equals. you flaunting Pokémon Showdown, whilst aiding in this riot, only shows your ignorance in what it means to be a trainer.
twitch chat
January 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Don Han'Cho tells Kripp to disenchant his collection

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp its Don Han'Cho SMOrc SMOrc from da grimy goons. I got a job for yah. I know about a warehouse holding thousands of pounds of arcane dust. I got a tip that this place is called "collecteen manajaire" sounds french or somethin I don know. Anyways what I want you to do is da sneak in to dis place and look for a button called "deez ench ant". You whack dat and da goons will take care of da rest. You game?
twitch chat
December 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

I saw 1.9293948382% of a girl's shoulders today

I saw 1.9293948382% of a girl's shoulders today. I immediately fell to my knees, as the rush of dopamine caused my the impending earth-shattering orgasm started making me moan loud enough to deafen everyone in the immediate vicinity. What followed was a torrential downpour of every single sperm cell I ever have or ever will produce, shot out so hard that my dick was ripped apart by my übernut accelerating to 5% the speed of light by the time it left my urethra. It vaporized the girl as it punched right through her, barely slowed, before cutting through a structural support beam in the school as if it were a nuclear-powered angle grinder. The sheer weight of this historical nut, combined with the total destruction of everything in its path, caused the school to collapse, and every female in the state of New Jersey to fall pregnant with my children. When the final death toll was tallied, there were 146 deaths, 458 injuries, and over 4 million pregnancies. As I lay dying under the rubble of my high school, I rest easy, knowing every one of my sons will repeat my glorious actions.
August 2021

Quibi is shutting down

twitchquotes: Quibi is shutting down. What’s the fuckin point anymore? Now what am I supposed to do when I go to a restaurant and they tell me my table won’t be ready for another eight minutes? How am I supposed to pass those eight minutes using a cell phone and internet connection without quibi exclusive content only available on quibi? Where else can i get “quick bites” of content streaming directly to my mobile phone for viewing on the go? As if 2020 wasn’t bad enough now I can’t watch any more murder house flip, the show where they renovate houses where human beings have lost their lives at the hands of their loved ones and sell those houses to rich cosmopolitan couples looking to move out of the city? What’s the point? I for one am not “content” with the current state of the “content”
twitch chat
October 2020

PepeRip

⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⣉⣉⣉⡙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠹⠟⣡⣶⡿⢟⣛⣛⡻⢿⣦⣩⣤⣤⣤⣬⡉⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠄⢀⢤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠿⢮⡃⣛⣛⡻⠿⢿⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡟⢡⣴⣯⣿⣿⣿⣉⠤⣤⣭⣶⣶⣶⣮⣔⡈⠛⠛⠛⢓⠦⠈⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠏⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⡪⢛⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣼⣿⣿⣿⣶⣮⣄⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣾⡭⠴⣶⣶⣽⣽⣛⡿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠇⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣝⣛⢛⡛⢋⣥⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⠱⣿⣿⣛⠾⣭⣛⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠑⠽⡻⢿⣿⣮⣽⣷⣶⣯⣽⣳⠮⣽⣟⣲⠯⢭⣿⣛⣛⣿⡇⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠈⠑⠊⠉⠟⣻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣾⣭⣿⣛⠷⠶⠶⠂⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠁⠙⠒⠙⠯⠍⠙⢉⣉⣡⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
July 2019

Pepe

Professional headmeat physician

twitchquotes: ce: Hello Tyler, this is Dhanraj Ameer, the professional headmeat physician, thank you for contacting me last week. My team and I have been looking at x-rays of your skull and we are interested in a procedure that involves taking the head meat from the sides of your head and using it to fill in the dent in the middle. Due to the severity of your head meat slabs this procedure only has a 10% likelihood of success due to the extreme invasiveness the slab removal will take. Let me know
twitch chat
July 2019
Tyler1
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