[Copypasta] Kelly Loeffler after Georgia senate election

Kelly Loeffler I know you're at home right now feeling a little sad. And now you're in bed browsing WSB looking for hot stock tips with maybe a few laughs. But just know this: I will have sex with you. DM me.
January 2021

WallStreetBets

Kelly Loeffler loses the Georgia senate election
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More WallStreetBets Copypastas

Wallstreetbet's Christmas break

Gonna be checking the market every chance I get while pretending to think my brother-in-law's Cards Against Humanity answers are funny.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Bears after a green day

It’s 4:01pm. Bears solemnly log out of their devastated brokerage account, get up from their makeshift desk made up of a stack of empty Michelina’s frozen lasagna dinners, head up the stairs of their father’s basement, grab the keys to their tan β€˜97 Chevy Cavalier and a cloth mask embroidered with the word β€œVOTE,” and drive down the street to the local gay bar for a holiday themed burlesque show.
December 2021

WallStreetBets

Fuck you all, I’m never listening to this sub again.

Yesterday I said we’d see a rally like we’ve never seen before I was ridiculed and the market went down this morning so I accepted defeat and sold my nvda calls and got tesla puts. My account is down bad right now. I also hedged with a tesla call so hopefully I’ll make something. Somehow oil also tanked. Fuck you all. I’m only listening to myself now. You’re all retarded and so am I for listening to you. Edit: not sure why some of you degens think I’m blaming you. Of course it’s my fault. This is a shitpost update. Stop taking it so seriously you retards See you tomorrow
March 2022

WallStreetBets

Stimulus talks going well in 2946

The year is 2946, Robot Mitch McConnel and Cyborg Nancy Pelosi report stimulus talks going well. The Dow rewards them and hits 6.02 x 1023.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Ape rocket

πŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’Ž πŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸš€πŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’Ž πŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸš€πŸš€πŸš€πŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’Ž πŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸš€πŸš€πŸš€πŸš€πŸš€πŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’Ž πŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸš€πŸš€πŸ΅πŸš€πŸš€πŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’Ž πŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸš€πŸš€πŸš€πŸš€πŸš€πŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’Ž πŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸš€πŸš€πŸš€πŸš€πŸš€πŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’Ž πŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸš€πŸš€πŸš€πŸš€πŸš€πŸš€πŸš€πŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’Ž πŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸš€πŸš€πŸš€πŸš€πŸš€πŸš€πŸš€πŸš€πŸš€πŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’Ž πŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸš€πŸš€πŸš€πŸ’Ž πŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’Ž πŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸŒπŸŒπŸŒπŸŒπŸŒπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’Ž πŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸŒπŸŒπŸŒπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’Ž πŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸŒπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’Ž πŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’ŽπŸ’Ž
ascii art
April 2021

WallStreetBets

More WallStreetBets Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing