[Copypasta] Kelly Loeffler after Georgia senate election

Kelly Loeffler I know you're at home right now feeling a little sad. And now you're in bed browsing WSB looking for hot stock tips with maybe a few laughs. But just know this: I will have sex with you. DM me.
January 2021

WallStreetBets

Kelly Loeffler loses the Georgia senate election
I used to be a real ad
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Apple announces an EV program

Oh boy I can't wait until 2024 when I can wake up to my Apple Homepod Siri alarm and check my Apple Watch for notifications and take a shower in my Apple Big Douche then put my makeup on before work in my Apple Mirror then take my Apple Car to my job at Apple Phone Plant #584 so I can work on my Mac Pro workstation designing the latest Apple Product the iShit smart toilet that syncs with your iAsshole to sense when you have a massive log brewing in my large intestine and sends me a notification to my apple colonoscopy bag. Russian hackers will know what I had for dinner.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Police clearing out a homeless encampment

On my way into the office today I saw the police clearing out a homeless encampment under a bridge, forcing them into the cold and rain. I keep playing it over in my head and haven’t been able to focus on work all day because of my erection.
January 2021

WallStreetBets

GME to the moon

.γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€ ✦ 　　　　   γ€€ γ€€γ€€γ€€Λšγ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€*γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€β€ˆ β€ˆγ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€.γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€. γ€€γ€€β€ˆγ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€ ✦ γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€ γ€€ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€ γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€,　　   　 .γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€.γ€€γ€€γ€€οΎŸγ€€β€‚β€‚γ€€γ€€γ€€.γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€β˜€οΈif we holdγ€€γ€€. ,γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€.γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€β€ˆβ€ˆβ€ˆβ€ˆγ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€ γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€β€ˆ γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€. γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€.γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€. γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€β€Šβ€Šβ€Šβ€ˆβ€ˆβ€Šβ€Šγ€€β€ˆβ€ˆβ€ˆγ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€β€Šβ€Šβ€Šβ€ˆβ€ˆβ€Šβ€Šγ€€β€ˆβ€ˆβ€ˆ ✦ 　   　　　,γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€β€ˆβ€Šβ€Šβ€ŠπŸš€ gme γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€ γ€€γ€€,γ€€γ€€γ€€ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ γ€€ γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€.γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€β€ˆγ€€γ€€ γ€€γ€€γ€€.γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€β€ˆγ€€β€Šβ€Šβ€ˆβ€ˆβ€ˆβ€ˆβ€ˆβ€ˆβ€ˆβ€Šβ€Šγ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€Λšγ€€   　　　　,γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€β€Šβ€Šβ€Šβ€Šβ€Šβ€Šβ€Šγ€€β€Šβ€ˆβ€ˆβ€ˆγ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€.γ€€γ€€γ€€ β€ˆγ€€γ€€β€‚β€‚β€‚β€‚γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€β€ˆγ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€.γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€.γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€* γ€€γ€€   　　　　　 ✦ γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€β€Šβ€Šβ€Šβ€Šβ€Šβ€Šβ€Šβ€Šβ€Šγ€€β€ˆβ€ˆβ€ˆβ€ˆβ€ˆβ€ˆβ€ˆβ€ˆγ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€ γ€€γ€€β€ˆγ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€β€ˆγ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€.γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€.　　　　　    　　. γ€€β€ˆγ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€.γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€ πŸŒ‘ γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€β€Šβ€Šβ€Šγ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€.γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€.γ€€ Λšγ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€οΎŸγ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€.γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€. γ€€γ€€β€ˆγ€€ 🌎 ‍ ‍ if we sell ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ,γ€€ γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€* .γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€β€ˆγ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€.γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€ ✦ Λšγ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€*γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€β€ˆ β€ˆγ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€.γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€.
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January 2021

WallStreetBets

Classic

Bloomberg terminal vs toilet trading

Imagine spending 20K on a bloomberg terminal and thousands on hardware just to get smoke checked by some retards on the toilet trading on their phone that are not only on the spectrum but might be the actual spectrum.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

MSFT Infinite Money Glitch πŸš€πŸš€πŸš€

Disclaimer: I am not a financial or investment advisor. Before this subreddit was ruined by ten million people, solid DD used to get done. Do you ever find yourself reminiscing about the good β€˜ol WSB days? Well, your prayers have been answered. Degenerates gather around, as I am bringing you a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to make some serious $MSFT tendies πŸš€ Today, Bill Gates announced that after twenty-seven years of marriage, he will be divorcing. Do you know what this means? Bill is single and ready to mingle. Step 1: Use Wife’s Tinder Account Step 2: Match with Bill Gates Step 3: Wife goes on date with Bill, they fall in love, he proposes, no pre-nup Step 4: Wife marries Bill and becomes $MSFT royalty Step 5: Continue to date wife Step 6: Cash out πŸš€πŸš€πŸš€ For those too retarded to read: https://preview.redd.it/tts3psz5q0x61.jpg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5f68092ae47d414627c6dee8a0c4afd6808bcc57 Congratulations. You are now your own wife’s boyfriend.
May 2021

WallStreetBets

Classic

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