[Copypasta] Magic Sex Gun YouTube ad script

This is my magic sex gun. All I do is point it at a woman I want to fuck, and BANG! She's all over me. How does it work? Go to MagicSexGun.com. You can have your own! And it's not buying hookers, not using personal sites, and definitely not spanking it to p**n... so go to MagicSexGun.com before we take the site down. This magic sex gun works especially well on younger women. Point your magic sex gun at your innocent-looking young coworker and bam! She's sucking your d**k below the desk. Point it at the cute young French woman bagging your groceries and bam! She's letting you rail her behind the dumpster. And of course... point it at any girl on a dating app site, and well... you'll feel like you have a sex machine gun with all the women you're mowing down. This is only if you go to MagicSexGun.com. Get it right now: MagicSexGun.com. There's only so many magic sex guns available, so you want to get in while the getting is good. MAGICSEXGUN.COM!
January 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

I used to work at an abortion clinic

I used to work at an abortion clinic and I saw some extremely fucked up shit there which is why I'm so anti-abortion now. This is just SOME of the horrible stuff I personally witnessed: • ⁠A 23 year old woman came in 11 months into her pregnancy and said "I don't want my stupid baby anymore, kill it" and the doctor said "okay" and he put jumper cables up her baby hole and connected them to a car battery and let it run for six days straight • ⁠A little 8-year old girl wandered in and said "I want an abortion but I am not pregnant" and the doctor said "we'll fix that" and he stole a baby and cut the girl open and put the baby inside her and sewed her shut and then woke the girl up and said "congratulations it's a healthy six year old boy" and the girl said "can I keep him" and the doctor said no and then backed over her in the parking lot with his brand new Ford Raptor • ⁠They made me sign an agreement promising to stop drinking from the medical waste container (I signed somebody else's name) • ⁠One of the doctors there developed a futuristic ray gun that could make anything he shot have an abortion, even trees, cars, or barns • ⁠The receptionist threw nail polish at an elderly man • ⁠The doctor's assistant invented this thing she called "the silly slide" and it was a really fun little water slide that connected a woman's vagina to a paper shredder so a newborn baby could briefly "enjoy the high life" • ⁠The oldest child we aborted was in his late 70s, we didn't even know he was a baby until his wife brought in photos • ⁠The doctors put all sorts of crap up a woman's uterus including a clown nose, bicycle handlebars, a calendar, and an entire Sears retail outlet (before bankruptcy) • ⁠During every successful abortion, the doctor would shout "take that, baby" and he'd push a red button that made sirens go off and confetti fell from the ceiling and we'd all get Del Taco for free
August 2021

NSFW

PewDiePie saying the N word

⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⣌⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢸⣭⡇⢽⣿⣿⠏⣀⣶⡇⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣾⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣭⣛⢃⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡛⠈⠛⠁⠙⠉⠛⠿⠛⢟⡿⣿⣷⡝⢿⡿⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡹⠄⢀⣷⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⡍⠹⡿⠆⠙⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⢫⣷⣧⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⢀⣴⣶⣏⡛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⢸⣿⣿⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠁⠄⠄⣾⣿⣿⣿⡟⣨⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡘⣿⣿⣧⣀⣀⣹⣏⢀⣀⣀⣀⣠⡄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣷⣼⣋⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠄⠈⠛⢿⠏⢙⠈⠁⠄⠙⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠄⠹⠟⠛⠉⠡⠿⣿⡏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⣿ ⣿⣿⠿⠃⠄⠄⣀⡀⠄⠄⠈⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢹ ⠄⠄⢀⡆⣰⠟⠷⣤⠤⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⢀⠎⠄⠃⢀⠞⠉⢳⣴⣶⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀
December 2018

There is a bunch of Twitch overlords

twitchquotes: There is a bunch of Twitch overlords who grow batches of streamers from genetically modified eggs. When these eggs hatch and grow, they are given their first computer and start streaming a Dora the Explorer game. As they grow up, the most popular streamers advance and are given more complex games to stream, from CoD to Hearthstone. Each streamer lives in a small cubicle, and there are hundreds upon hundreds of cubicles on the grounds of the Twitch Headquarters. deIlluminati
twitch chat
March 2016
Kripp

Only the chosen wizard can wear his hat

twitchquotes: AMPEnergyCherry Only the chosen wizard can wear his hat つ◕౪◕つ──☆*:・
twitch chat
May 2016
Reynad

40% of the chat are 41 year olds pretending to be 14

twitchquotes: This chat disgusts me. 40% of the chat are 41 year olds pretending to be 14. The other 40% are 14 year olds pretending to be 41. And the remaining 30% just copy pastes the longest message they can find in the chat. Grow up chat, grow up. FailFish
twitch chat
January 2019

Classic

I hate Twitch Chat

Text-to-Speech Playing