[Copypasta] Luigi's donger

twitchquotes: In 2018 Nintendo released official marketing art that featured Luigi in Mario Tennis, fans were able to figure out the length of Luigi’s penis by measuring the tennis racket compared to luigi’s bulge in the image. Since Tennis rackets are 28 inches long in real life, by measuring the pixels we were able to mathematically deduce that Luigi’s penis is 3.7 inches flacid.
twitch chat
December 2020
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Response to the Vaporeon copypasta (Vaporeons are dangerous)

Hey guys did you know that in terms of water Pokemon inland, Vaporeon would be very capable of hunting grown humans? Their bodies being the size of a medium dog and weight are just enough to pounce on a man and throw him to the ground. Their bulky stats would allow them to shrug off and outlast any attempts by the human to fight them off, and that's not getting even into moves like Hydro Pump and Scald. But that's not all these water dogs have up their sleeves. Their bodies being so similar to water not only lets them hide in bodies of water and become nearly invisible to catch prey off guard, but allows them to enter the body through almost any orifice. Things do not get any better once a Vaporeon is inside of you. If asphyxiation doesn't kill you, the internal bleeding and displacement of internal organs certainly will. In addition, they are able to learn Charm, allowing them to take advantage of certain... desires humans may have and create even more opportunities to go in for the kill. But wait, there's more. Since Vaporeon is an omnivore, its cells would need to be able to digest proteins, such as those in meat. This only opens even more possibilities as to what these creatures are capable of.
March 2022

Pokemon

SMOrc

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣴⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣾⣿⣯⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣿⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣯⣽⣶⣶⣾⣕⣝⣧⣣⢫⡋⡿⠿⣇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⢖⢬⣍⠻⣿⣿⡜⢧⠑⣴⣿⣿⣦⠀⠀ ⠀⠐⠻⣿⣿⣟⣛⡻⠶⣦⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡗⢿⣿⣿⢙⠛⣃⠬⢄⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣿⣿⠁⠀⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⣚⣏⣴⢟⣟⠁⣰⠀⡇⣄⣽⣿⡄⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣶⡾⠿⢻⣿⣿⡛⠋⠁⣠⢏⣵⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⡘⡜⡿⠃⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠿⣿⡿⣿⢻⡧⢀⡞⣡⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣷⢁⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⡿⣼⣳⢿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣶⣶⡶⠶⣶⣍⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⢷⣿⣿⣿⡿⢋⠀⢶⠂⠶⠀⠄⠄⡤⣤⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⠈⣿⣿⠟⠀⣰⡇⢀⡀⠀⠠⠀⠀⠀⠉⣤⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⡇⠼⠷⢿⣇⢸⣷⡀⣾⡆⣾⣷⠠⡿⠆⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⣽⣿⣷⣿⡿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣷⣦⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠛⠛⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣤⣈⡉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠁⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣯⣭⣯⣭⣤⣶⣶⣶⣶⣦⣤⡈⠁⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠛⠿⠛⠛⠁⠈⠉⠙⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀
ascii art
October 2020

Please put an NSFW tag on this

Please put an NSFW tag on this. I was on the train and when I saw this I had to start furiously masturbating. Everyone else gave me strange looks and were saying things like “what the fuck” and “call the police”. I dropped my phone and everyone around me saw this image. Now there is a whole train of men masturbating together at this one image. This is all your fault, you could have prevented this if you had just tagged this post NSFW.
December 2021

Reddit

I hate Reddit's new avatars

They look so incomprehensibly fucking STUPID. WHO CAME UP WITH THEM? I liked the old avatars, they were simple and friendly. Now every time, EVERY. SINGLE. FUCKING. TIME. I look at someone's username, I see this ugly little shit, an abomination. Makes me almost fucking VOMIT. THEY LOOK SO DAMN STUPID I'M FUCKING TIRED OF KT. IT LOOKS LIKE AN ALIEN HAD SEX WITH A COCKROACH, THEN WORE SOME UGLY SHIRT AND PANTS. THE REDDIT CREATURE DUDES ARENT SUPPOSED TO BE WEARING THIS STUPID ABOMINABLD SHIT. I HATE it. I want to BURN IT WITH FIRE. Sadly you can't burn JPGs. BUT EVERY TIME I SEE ONE IT MAKES ME WANT TO CRY AT FUCKING SPEZ
September 2021

Reddit

not an asexual thing

twitchquotes: ‘not an asexual thing’. try living a day in my shoes, walking around terrified of encountering sex everywhere i go. wherever i look, parents with children, people sucking each others’ faces. it makes me and millions of other aces out there feel really attacked.
twitch chat
February 2019

Classic

More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing