[Copypasta] Kripp please lick knee twice

twitchquotes: ʜᴇʟʟᴏ ᴋʀɪᴘᴘᴀʀʀɪɴᴏ ᴍʏ ʟᴏᴠᴇ, ᴛʜɪs ɪs Rᴀɴɪᴀ. Mʏ ᴛᴏɴɢᴜᴇ ᴀʟʟ ᴛɪʀᴇᴅ ᴏᴜᴛ ғʀᴏᴍ ʟɪᴄᴋɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜʀ sᴡᴇᴇᴛ ᴋɴᴇᴇ ᴊᴜɪᴄᴇ ᴀʟʟ ɴɪɢʜᴛ. ᴘʟᴇᴀsᴇ ʟɪᴄᴋ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴋɴᴇᴇ ᴛᴡɪᴄᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ɪɴ ʀᴇᴡᴀʀᴅ ɪ ʀᴀɪsᴇ ᴜʀ ᴅᴏɴɢᴇʀ. ᴘʟᴇᴀsᴇ ɴᴏ ᴀʟ ᴘᴀᴄɪɴᴏ.
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp
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Are you going to pay for another pizza?

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp! So here I was enjoying my favorite food (pizza) and watching your stream having a good time when it started to taste extra salty. It turns out you were being super salty and now have ruined my pizza. Are you going to pay for another pizza or will I have to call the cops? This is serious.
twitch chat
March 2015
Kripp

Classic

Hearthstone

salty

Brofist and crofist

twitchquotes: Dear Kripp, I am a lawyer and I represent StrifeCro. I notice that your 'brofist' is strikingly similar to StrifeCro's 'crofist'. Given that StrifeCro owns the 'fisting' patent, I request that you immediately cease and desist from 'brofisting' any more subs, or my client will take you to court. Yours sincerely, Eddie Barristerino.
twitch chat
February 2015
Kripp

Mr. Morosan's deceptive practices

twitchquotes: Twitch Chat (“Chat”) respectfully submits this memorandum of law in support of its motion to enjoin Octavian Morosan (“nl_Kripp”) from distributing false and deceptive advertising for his stream. The "nl" of Mr. Morosan's streaming identity refers to "no life." This is a blatantly deceptive and demonstrably false claim as it can be qualitatively determined that Mr. Morosan does indeed have a life. The Lanham Act merits an injunction preventing Mr. Morosan's deceptive practices.
twitch chat
April 2017
Kripp

Kripp has contracted Casualitis

twitchquotes: The average length of Kripp's stream has decreased over the past 3 years from an average length of 11 hours to the current average of 5 hours. In 2 more years, Kripp will stream for 0 hours. What's the cause? Sources say Kripp has contracted a terminal illness - Casualitis. Soon he will join Katarrian in Heaven. BibleThump
twitch chat
November 2015
Kripp

Kripp subscribes to life

twitchquotes: Ｉ　ｕｎｓｕｂｓｃｒｉｂｅｄ　ｆｒｏｍ　ｌｉｆｅ　ｔｏ　ｗａｔｃｈ　Ｋｒｉｐｐａｒｉａｎ，　ｄｅｖｏｔｅｄ　ａｎｄ　ｓｕｂｓｃｒｉｂｅｄ　ｍｙｓｅｌｆ　ｔｏ　ｈｉｍ，　ｈｉｓ　ｃｈａｎｎｅｌ；　ｈｏｗ　ａｍ　Ｉ　ｒｅｐａｉｄ？　Ｋｒｉｐｐ　ｂｅｔｒａｙｓ　ｍｅ，　ｓｕｂｓｃｒｉｂｉｎｇ　ｈｉｍｓｅｌｆ　ｔｏ　ＬＩＦＥ！　i’ｍ　ｓｏｒｒｙ　Ｋｒｉｐｐ，　ｂｕｔ　ＴＨＩＳ　ＭＯＮＴＨ　ｙｏｕ　ａｒｅｎ’ｔ　ｇｅｔｔｉｎｇ　ｙｏｕｒ　ｄｏｎｇｅｒｓ，　ＵＮＳＵＢＢＥＤ．
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp
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