I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas
Stream snipers
twitchquotes:
One day, the Papa asks Kripp to go fishing, Kripp shrugs, βAlright, but catch and release only β Iβm vegan.β They arrive at the local pristine clear waters of an Ontario stream brimming with wild trout and prepare to fish. Suddenly Kripp shouts, βGet down!β. A crack sounds through the air, and the Papa sees Kripp on the ground bleeding. His final words are, βFucking stream snipers.β
twitch chat
Kripp
Hearthstone
Hi Kripp, sleazy video game developer here
twitchquotes:
Hi Kripp, sleazy video game developer here. I understand you are willing to sell yourself out like a cheap Romanian hooker to any two-bit game development outfit as long as they dangle some shekels in front of your beady little eyes? Great! Because I have this brilliant game in beta testing right now called "Watching Paint Dry" and I am willing to pay you $5.00 USD to play it for 24 hours straight. Let me know what you think, you glorious sellout!
twitch chat
Kripp
sellout
Classic
A few feet offscreen, Dex sits in a cage
twitchquotes:
A few feet offscreen, Dex sits in a cage far too small for himself. Malnourished because of his "vegan" diet, his ribs are clearly visible through his coat. He barely has the energy to move, let alone enjoy life. Yet, he knows there's hope. He knows he could draw attention to himself, as he hears Kripp constantly talking to someone. In a single act of defiance, Dex barks to draw attention to his dire situation. "Quiet, Dex" is his only reply as Kripp ignores his pleas yet again.
twitch chat
Kripp
Hello Kripp, proud brony here
twitchquotes:
πππππππππππ Hello Kripp, proud brony here. I was just wondering if you could played the "dreadsteed" deck as it reminds me of my waifu Twilight Sparkle. Thanks, it would mean soooo much to me (βΏβ―βΏβ―βΏ) ππππππππππππππ
twitch chat
Kripp
Hearthstone
Dear Kripparian, how dare you
twitchquotes:
Dear Kripparian, how dare you... I have dedicated my life to Hearthstone. I am a proud Hearthstoner and so are the rest of your fans. You cannot betray us and start playing a Hearthstone competitor. I can fall asleep to your HS streams because of how casual it is, but this game is too complicated and it keeps me awake. If you betray us we will rise up, you have been warned.
twitch chat
Kripp