[Copypasta] I, as a heterosexual man

twitchquotes: I, as a heterosexual man, would never feel attraction to another man. Not even a slim, supple young lad with hyper feminine features in the most endearing cat outfit you could possibly imagine. That doesn't seem attractive to me at all. If you find pictures of men like this, you can just send them to me so I know what to watch out for and avoid.
twitch chat
November 2020
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Let's build a wall chat

twitchquotes: Let's build a wall chat KKona β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄β”€
twitch chat
November 2016

2016 US Election

I want to give you head

twitchquotes: I want to give you head. Yes, head. Not the one you're thinking of. Not even in a sexual way. I want to give you heads up about the walk for charity. Yes, a walk for charity through which we can touch the lives of children living in extreme poverty.
twitch chat
February 2019

Not your naked body

Lord Microsoft

10:43 PM, Microsoft Tower, Washington. A figure stands in shadow, red lights from the theistic ceiling flood the spacious hall. Along the sides, hallmark pieces of technology are proudly displayed on golden pedestals. The Xbox, Windows, Hololens; At the center of it all, the vaccine. "Microsoft Microbe Covid-19" the label on the syringe reads. A glowing substance can be seen sitting still inside. Monitors flicker to life at the end of the hall, each one showing the point of view of an innocent civilian. The light draws a silhouette of a man. His body, frail. His skin is leathery and rugged. Breathing apparatus cover his face, a cold green mist slowly spewing out. The grand door opens, humanoids armed with weapons drag an unkempt and furious man towards the being in shadow. They throw him to the floor, spit slathering the ground. "This is the last one?" the figure asks. "Yes, Lord Microsoft. all 4,607,423,673 other citizens have been accounted for." The rugged man looks upwards, his face bloodied and bruised. His eyes meet Lord Microsoft's. Puffed from tears, his eyes can only show one emotion: anger. "Bill Gates, you piece of shit. I swore to Samantha that if I ever-" "Silence, creature!" Lord Microsoft slaps him with the back of his hand. "I am lord Microsoft, and you will refer to me as such!" The guards grab the man, hoisting him up. "Now, let us delay no further. It has taken me years to get to this point, and I will not have my victory denied!" Lord Microsoft grabs the vaccine and primes it for injection. "Such a small thing, isn't it? Yet, it has afforded me the right to dominate all life on Earth. Covid was a blessing, not a curse." The man's eyes widened, he screams in retaliation, but the guards shut his mouth with force. Lord Microsoft pierces his flesh with the needle. A flourescent orange liquid can be seen coursing through his veins. He falls to the floor, his muscles tightening and constricting in unnatural fashion. His eyes bulge from his skull and he shouts in pain. He slumps over, and in only a moment he comes back to his feet. His pupils dilated and his skin, pale. "How may I serve you, my lord."
August 2021

COVID

Coronavirus

Discord user cracks after seeing the word β€œsus”

oh my god among us isnt FUCKING FUNNY ANYMORE ITS BEEN MONTHS MONTHS IM SICK OF THIS SHIT JUST FIND SOMETHING ELSE PEOPLE OH MY GOD EVERYTHING ABOUT AMONG US IS UNCOOL LITERALLY EVERYTHING IT SCREAMS β€œIM A VIRGIN” AND GODDAMNIT THAT WHEN THE IMPOSTER IS SUS SHITB ITS NOT FUNNY ITS A DUDE ON METH WHY DO PEOPLE LAUGH AT THIS LIKE WHAT THE HELL BRO PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD HOLY SHIT HUMANITY IS FUCKed THIS IS AN ABSOLUTE ALL TIME LOW OH MY FYCKING LOOORDDD DUDE @everyone STOP MAKING AMONG US JOKES ITS NOT FUCKING FUNNY holy shit fuck anybody who finds among us funny im done with this shit
July 2021

Among Us / Amogus

-15 LP Delivery

β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–Œβ–β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–Œ β”€β”€β”€β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–ˆ BEEP BEEP β–„β–„β–„β–Œβ–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–ˆ -15 LP DELIVERY β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–Œ β–€(βŠ™)β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€(βŠ™)(βŠ™)β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€(βŠ™
July 2022

Teamfight Tactics

League of Legends

Text-to-Speech Playing