[Copypasta] I, as a heterosexual man

twitchquotes: I, as a heterosexual man, would never feel attraction to another man. Not even a slim, supple young lad with hyper feminine features in the most endearing cat outfit you could possibly imagine. That doesn't seem attractive to me at all. If you find pictures of men like this, you can just send them to me so I know what to watch out for and avoid.
twitch chat
November 2020
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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What are these mods doing?

twitchquotes: What the fuck are these mods doing? The whole chat is being spammed and absolutely nothing is being done about it. This is the worst fucking stream I have ever watched. I have wonder why anybody would purchase a subscription to this shit hole. This message will probably be drowned out by the circlejerk going on in chat. Fuck you, you fucking spammers. You ruined my fucking day.
twitch chat
August 2018

MODS

I hate Twitch Chat

If Biden wins, I'm moving to Alaska

twitchquotes: I simply will not stand to live in a country ruled by Biden. So if he wins the election, I am packing my bags and moving far away, where Joseph "Malarkey" Biden cannot reach me. I will be starting a new life in Alaska.
twitch chat
November 2020

2020 US Election

bruh moments

My gf gets mad when I call her cheating “bruh moments” and I’m not sure what to do She hooked up with some guys and instead of breaking down and crying or whatever she wanted me to do I just played bruh bass boosted for five minutes while staring at her so she’s angry now but what should I do
July 2022

Confessions

I hate Among Us

I can't fucking take it. I see an image of a random object posted and then I see it, I fucking see it. "Oh that looks kinda like the among us guy" it started as. That's funny, that's a cool reference. But I kept going, I'd see a fridge that looked like among us, I'd see an animated bag of chips that looked like among us, I'd see a hat that looked like among us. And every time I'd burst into an insane, breath deprived laugh staring at the image as the words AMOGUS ran through my head. It's torment, psychological torture, I am being conditioned to laugh maniacly any time I see an oval on a red object. I can't fucking live like this... I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't! And don't get me fucking started on the words! I'll never hear the word suspicious again without thinking of among us. Someone does something bad and I can't say anything other than "sus." I could watch a man murder everyone I love and all I would be able to say is "red sus" and laugh like a fucking insane person. And the word "among" is ruined. The phrase "among us" is ruined. I can't live anymore. Among us has destroyed my fucking life. I want to eject myself from this plane of existence. MAKE IT STOP!
February 2021

Among Us / Amogus

You better wear the TSM T-Shirt

twitchquotes: Hello TSM_Kripp, TSM manager here. We can see that you aren't wearing our TSM T-shirt. Remember that it is a vital part of our contract. If you want the fuckmaster-vol7ron you better wear the damn shirt.
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp
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