I own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.
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More Copypastas
Pleb Test Passed
twitchquotes:
β amazW β krippW β trumpW β reynadW β kolentoW β bajW β dewW β emjaneW β forsenW β krippW β loidW β mitchW β reckW β sodaW β taymooW β PLEB TEST PASSED.
twitch chat
Kripp
plebs vs subs
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Classic
This guy's brofist is CRAZY
twitchquotes:
β This guy's brofist is CRAZY!β β βMy knuckles can't win against a fist like thatβ β "He NEEDED precisely those 2 fingers to win" β βHe brofisted the only sub that could beat meβ β "He had the perfect fist β βThere was nothing I could fistβ β βI fisted that perfectlyβ
twitch chat
Kripp
The year is 2025. Kripp lies on his deathbed
twitchquotes:
The year is 2025. Kripp lies on his deathbed, the countless years of veganism finally having taken their toll. He struggles to adjust his eyes to the glare of his computer screen, yearning to view his beloved twitch chat one more time. All he sees is degenerate weeb spam. His eyes brim with tears. He begins gasping his final breath, and in his final moments he tells Rania "K"
twitch chat
Kripp
My dong strong and hard as diamond
twitchquotes:
No one believed in my dong, but when I raised it, QTpie saw it and found a shred of potential in it. Then he believed. And all the others did as well. QTpie believes, and now so do I. I shall climb these mountains of Gold, destroy those Platinum plebs, and then, and only then, my dong will be strong and hard. As a diamond.
twitch chat
imaqtpie