[Copypasta] I have done it, 80 years and not a single nut bust

I hate gaming laptops

Today when I walked into my economics class I saw something I dread every time I close my eyes. Someone had brought their new gaming laptop to class. The Forklift he used to bring it was still running idle at the back. I started sweating as I sat down and gazed over at the 700lb beast that was his laptop. He had already reinforced his desk with steel support beams and was in the process of finding an outlet for a power cable thicker than Amy Schumer's thigh. I start shaking. I keep telling myself I'm going to be alright and that there's nothing to worry about. He somehow finds a fucking outlet. Tears are running down my cheeks as I send my last texts to my family saying I love them. The teacher starts the lecture, and the student turns his laptop on. The colored lights on his RGB Backlit keyboard flare to life like a nuclear flash, and a deep humming fills my ears and shakes my very soul. The entire city power grid goes dark. The classroom begins to shake as the massive fans begin to spin. In mere seconds my world has gone from vibrant life, to a dark, earth shattering void where my body is getting torn apart by the 150mph gale force winds and the 500 decibel groan of the cooling fans. As my body finally surrenders, I weep, as my school and my city go under. I fucking hate gaming laptops.

December 2020

All hail Wildturtle!

twitchquotes: OMG Its The Real Wildturtle! The best player in the whole NA Server! We are so blessed to be graced with this stream. All Hail Wildturtle!!! Please copy and paste this to show the great Wildturtle our love!

twitch chat

November 2014

WildTurtle

Avoid embarrasing incidents

twitchquotes: Hey chat, take it easy please. Sometimes I see the same message posted twice. Take your time to actually read chat to avoid embarrassing incidents like this. Thank you.

twitch chat

December 2018

Classic

No longer afford drugs after playing Star Wars Force Arena

twitchquotes: (sponsored viewer): My dad has been struggling with drug addiction for the last 20 years. After I showed him this game, he can no longer afford drugs! Thank you Star Wars™: Force Arena! SeemsGood

twitch chat

February 2017

Kripp

sellout

Pikachu

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ascii art

November 2014

[Copypasta] I have done it, 80 years and not a single nut bust

I hate gaming laptops

All hail Wildturtle!

Avoid embarrasing incidents

Classic

No longer afford drugs after playing Star Wars Force Arena

sellout

Pikachu

Pokemon

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